October 2023

Seniors Issue

Human Connection

Transforming The Way We Think, Feel & Live

Thursday, November 2, 2023

12:00–2:00pm

Hilton La Jolla Torrey Pines

Join us for an inspiring conversation with Rabbi Sharon Brous as we explore the topic of human connection and its power to transform the way we think, feel, and live.

Drawing from ancient Jewish wisdom and contemporary social science, together we’ll gain a greater understanding for connection, kinship, and how to create a more loving and just society.

Rabbi Sharon Brous is the founding and senior rabbi of IKAR, a leading-edge Jewish community based in Los Angeles. Her TED talk “Reclaiming Religion” has been translated into 23 languages and her book, “The Amen Effect: Ancient Wisdom to Mend Our Broken Hearts and World,” will be released in early 2024.

Rabbi SHARON BROUS

In Conversation with Michael Hopkins, CEO of JFS

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Join us at the redesigned Hyatt Regency La Jolla at Aventine for a night unlike any other. Expect a beautiful Havdalah service in partnership with Shabbat San Diego, interactive experiences that highlight Federation’s key priorities and initiatives, the opportunity to make a meaningful contribution that support our programs and services, and lively entertainment to end the night.

San Diego Jewish life offers something for each of us, and we want everyone to learn about, see, and experience it.

Saturday, November 4, 2023 | 7 p.m.

Hyatt Regency La Jolla at Aventine

Co-Chairs: Glen Brodowsky & Jon Segal and Jon & Lisa Pearl

To learn more, purchase tickets or get involved, visit jewishinsandiego.org/federation360.

PUBLISHERS

Mark Edelstein and Dr. Mark Moss

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Jacqueline Bull

ASSISTANT EDITOR

Makayla Hoppe

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR

Eileen Sondak

CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Donna D’Angelo

SENIOR CONSULTANT

Ronnie Weisberg

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Emily Bartell, Linda Bennett, Leorah Gavidor, Emily Gould, Judith Fein (Senior Travel Correspondent), Paul Ross (Senior Travel Photographer), Patricia Goldblatt, Pat Launer, Sharon Rosen Leib, Andrea Simantov, Marnie Macauley, Rabbi Jacob Rupp, Rachel Eden, T.S. McNeil, Sybil Kaplan.

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Father Joe’s Villages Food Services Programs provide nearly a million meals a year. It is crucial that our neighbors have their basic needs met before they can achieve long-term independence, and three nutritious meals a day are essential to their overall well-being. Help ensure no neighbor goes hungry.

Don’t abandon your investment plan. Rethink it.

If market uctuations and economic uncertainty have you second-guessing your investment plan, it’s time to take a closer look. With an Envision® plan, you can help ensure your goals are measurable, reprioritize them if necessary, and adjust your strategy to re ect realistic expectations and your own comfort level for risk. Call today to get started.

e Plans of Man

I pride myself in being a competent host and tour guide of San Diego when I have out-oftown guests. I have a portfolio of suggestions of where to eat, what to go see, what to do, how to get there, when is the best time. I have my iron-clad recommendation for every first-time visitor: Balboa Park, at least one beach (that I tailor my suggestion to their needs) and the zoo. My suggestions are all things that I’m happy to accompany my guests on. My interests are varied and something that is fun once is likely to be fun a couple months later.

The one thing I always tell visitors is that I’m happy to do any capital “T” tourist things with them, but the thing I absolutely won’t do any more is go see the seals. It’s not what you think. I like seals. I like animals. I like sea animals. I have stood quiet and still and watched from the railing the seals wiggling on the sand to sun themselves. I have gasped in awe when a seal breached out of the water a couple yards from me and my paddleboard in Mission Bay.

I have also gritted my teeth when I’ve seen people shimmy up to a seal with a selfie stick and a goofy grin. I have heard loud squeals and peals of laughter from the people walking down to the sand near them. (And as any La Jollans would know, I’ve also been downwind of them.)

In general, I’m a rule-follower, especially in regards to being respectful of others. You would never catch me playing music or talking on speakerphone in public. I don’t cut the line and always return my shopping cart at the grocery store. When someone’s actions are causing distress to others, then I truly get upset. Watching people be idiots around animals is always a blood pressure test and after a couple visits with out-of-town guests, I had to draw my line in the sand.

This matter has come to the fore when I read Point La Jolla will be closed year-round to protect the sea lions. The children’s pool seems to still be on the same schedule where it is closed during the pupping season only.

What to do about the seals and seal lions, I’ve come to find out, is one of those hyper-local controversial issues. Most people are in agreement that they wish people would act more respectfully around the sea life and keep their distance (though there is some disagreement on whether they are noble and fragile beasts or ugly and smelly nuisances); the real sticking point is usually in regards to Children’s Pool. It is a little funny that we built this big breakwater with a sandy beach that is soft and shallow for the intention of bringing our children to a beach tailored to their safety and then the seals decided it was a good place for their kids, too.

Perhaps this is a lesson in entropy, the power and vastness of the ocean, or the Yiddish saying “Man plans and G-d laughs.”

The Scene

2023 Globe Gala: Glitz & Glamour

PHOTOS

(From top, clockwise) Hilit and Barry Edelstein, Veronica and Miguel Le , Carol and Joel Ewan.

(At left) Gala Co-Chairs Pam Farr, Vicki Zeiger, Sue Major and Susan Hoehn.

Jerusalem Zoo Luncheon

The San Diego Friends of the Tisch Family Zoological Gardens in Jerusalem celebrated 20 years of its youth exchange program by inviting San Diego alumni of the program for a meet and greet at its annual luncheon. As usual, the event was held in the Treetops Room at the San Diego Zoo.

This year, there were no exchange students from Israel, but several veterans of the program shared their memories and the valuable lessons learned from the experience.

They credited the program for giving them an opportunity to interact with people from di erent backgrounds and to gain knowledge and experience in caring for zoo animals.

There were several special guests on hand, such as retired Congresswoman Susan Davis. Congressional certificates were distributed to several deserving supporters of the program. Another highlight of the afternoon event was watching a video about the Jerusalem Zoo and its current renovation, after 30 years in the Malha neighborhood.

Making critically important family decisions in the aftermath of emotional life changes can be extremely difficult. Our dedicated family law attorneys can help you navigate the complex divorce process with clarity.

Making critically important family decisions in the aftermath of emotional life changes can be extremely difficult. Our dedicated family law attorneys can help you navigate the complex divorce process with clarity.

Divorce, high conflict child custody, alternative dispute resolution, and more.

Making critically important family decisions in the aftermath of emotional life changes can be extremely difficult. Our dedicated family law attorneys can help you navigate the complex divorce process with clarity.

Divorce, high conflict child custody, alternative dispute resolution, and more.

Divorce, high conflict child custody, alternative dispute resolution, and more.

Legal Experts with Humanity

Legal Experts with Humanity

In emotional ceremony, heirs to ‘Cabaret’ inspiration

Fritz Grünbaum take back 7 Egon Schiele works stolen by the Nazis

They had seen the pictures before, in the collections of the museums that owned them until earlier this year. But the heirs of Fritz Grünbaum, a Viennese cabaret performer killed in the Holocaust, said the works had conveyed a powerful e ect now that they had been restored to Grünbaum’s estate.

“When viewing these artworks, imagine Fritz and Elisabeth in their lively Vienna apartment, singing, dancing, cracking jokes,” Timothy Reif, a distant relative, said in his remarks during a somber ceremony in downtown Manhattan. He was referring to Grünbaum’s wife, who is presumed to have been killed by the Nazis in 1942. “Remembering their lives defeats Hitler’s plan to erase this brave Jewish man’s name from the book of history.”

Claudia Sheinbaum is on track to become Mexico’s first Jewish and woman president

The way things stand now, Mexico is headed to elect its first woman president next year. The two leading candidates in the polls for the 2024 election are Claudia Sheinbaum, Mexico City’s former mayor, and Xóchitl Gálvez, a senator representing the center-right opposition bloc.

The polls point to another first: Sheinbaum, currently the frontrunner, could become the country’s first Jewish president, too.

How ‘Had Gadya’ inspired famed Catholic painter Frank Stella, a leader of the Minimalist art movement

“Had Gadya,” the playful song about a destructive chain of events starting with one little goat, may be best-known for rousing sleepy children at the end of a long Passover seder.

But it is also the basis for a series by Frank Stella, the 87-year-old Catholic American artist credited with catalyzing the Minimalist movement of the 1960s. His 12 vibrant, abstract “Had Gadya” prints, completed between 1982 and 1984, are now on display at the Dr. Bernard Heller Museum in New York City.

Continue reading these stories at sdjewishjournal.com

LIVING ON THE FRONT PAGE

Autumn Blessings

With the holidays almost behind us, I’ve been struggling to find a way to hold onto the freshness, the hope, the giddy sense of expectation and blessing that has been a hallmark of the past two months. The cosmic irony of this desire is how closely it juxtaposes darkening autumnal skies. As the light, sultry summer days and starry nights become a fading memory, papaya smoothies and salads give way to hot cider and stews. Still, I’m trying to hold onto the sunshine and anticipation that were de facto elements of summer.

A March 2023 article in Forbes asserted that a respected survey discovered that 55% of respondents kept their January New Year’s resolutions for less than a year, with a whopping 11% lasting at least six months. 19% maintained their iron-clad (sic) commitments for at least one month and 11% couldn’t last for thirty days. Indeed, the breaking of promises that typically accompany the Gregorian New Year is so prevalent that two mid-January days have been uno cially designated as “Ditch New Year’s Resolutions Day” and “Quitter’s Day.”

At the time of this writing, my extended family and I are observing Sukkot. I’m a long distance from Jerusalem, visiting America’s East Coast. Days and nights are cooler than I’m used to and it would seem more logical to stay indoors, especially when the wind howls or it begins to rain. But this is precisely why we hunker down in a flimsy hut. Sitting inside of a strong house with

beautiful lighting, elegant furniture, soft pillows and other unimaginable comforts, we could become complacent, believing that we, ourselves, are the sources of all material acquisitions and communal recognition. Diplomas and expensive artwork that adorn our walls further add to feelings of deservedness.

Judaism places great value on community. We refrain from saying certain prayers unless a quorum of ten men are present. Friends who converted to the faith share that one of the first requirements was to live within walking distance of a traditional synagogue, accept invitations to holiday and Sabbath meals and learn in groups — chavrutot rather than by themselves. Participation is everything: safety and holiness in numbers.

As a member of a vibrant synagogue that sits smack-dab in the center of Jerusalem, it feels easy to swear allegiance to a merciful G-d who wants us to prosper, especially as I sit shoulderto-shoulder with others who sway with equal fervor. When I hear another woman crying, my eyes well up with tears. Hearing the pleas that emanate from the heart of a woman who struggles with infertility while dreaming of being called ‘Mommy,’ I shrink in humility from the blessings of my many children and grandchildren.

So, yes, observant Jews also make resolutions to lose weight, get back to the gym, stop smoking and get organized. And our respective failures undoubtedly mirror the accepted statistics. Because

continues on page 23 >>

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT AND JUDAISM THIS WAY TO EDEN

This is 40

When I was a kid, I would wake up to my birthday with a song sung by my family in unison (and usually o -key) and a loaded question: So? How does it feel to be X years old? Like chicken soup or warm apple pie, I felt that good fuzzy feeling inside with that familiar question. The only part of the question that changed was the number. Even my answer would always stay the same. “Same as yesterday!” I’d smile. But a remarkable phenomenon has happened to me since I turned 40 years old. I don’t feel the same. I’m not talking about a sore knee from running or being a lighter sleeper or the cracks my bones make from simply moving, I’m talking about the persona and identity I have today that feels entirely di erent from just a few months ago.

Firstly, I’ll just say it and hopefully I don’t sound as contemptible or obnoxious as I think I might: I’ve leveled up. Beyonce (heard of her?) has three children, is 42 years old and is completing a five-month tour of over 56 shows. Not only that, but her tour has broken records across the board and her album has glowing critical reviews. She’s only growing more relevant with time, boasts the most loyal fanbase of arguably any celebrity and has been notably feeling lighter and having more fun this tour. Not too shabby. I’m finding myself projecting ideals, values and feelings onto her that I’m quite sure don’t exist, but are undeniably important for me.

For example, I think a lot about her ability to avoid exhaustion on tour and her willingness to be acutely present at home and at work. I’m reflecting on the frequency she’s traveling and how she must really nourish herself between trips to stay in peak performance mentally and physically. I’m noticing that despite all the wealth she’s accrued, she’s choosing her art form over retirement every day of this tour. As I expand my own leadership, wellness, ability to create, impact and connect, I’m noticing that I’ve upped my game thanks to all these Beyonce reflections. Most importantly, I’ve upped my willingness to check in and ask myself what I need to turn up the volume in all parts of my life.

A powerhouse of a woman, Geeta Nadkarni (also early 40s) built a sevenfigure consulting practice called Impact with Influence. I’ve long admired her communication skills, her ability to be open about her challenges while leading fearlessly and her ambition — so much ambition! I was in a state of shock when I discovered she went o the grid, let go of her team and shut down her business. Some time later, she revealed in an article that she had been su ering from personal lack of alignment and little energy. More time went by and she was finally diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. She had an existential crisis, no longer recognizing herself as the Type A she had been and was suicidal. She began to write of her

experiences. I reached out to her and she shared with me the best advice she had received: Don’t push past your energy envelope. Wow, I thought, I finally got it. Beyonce, Geeta, and I (we’re a team, of course) need to constantly check in with ourselves and honor our own needs instead of dismissing them in order to live and work and play at the highest levels. I’ve become really good at asking myself: What do I want? What do I need to get there? What’s an actionable step I can take to give myself what I need to create what I want?

This is 40. My body looks and feels di erent, but I also feel braver, bolder, more comfortable in my own skin and more confident in my leadership. I’ve always reflected a lot on leaving a legacy in this world and unlocking all of my potential. But it’s taken me all this time to realize that my ability to expand my own success, happiness, impact, wellness and wealth has everything to do with my willingness to slow down and ask myself check-in questions and generally give to myself abundantly so I feel great. I imagine Beyonce lavishing herself with massages, coaching appointments, quality time with the family and chill time for herself before undergoing 56 concerts and a whole lot of frequent flier miles. So? How does it feel to be 40 years old? Pretty. Darn. Good. A

RELIGION POST-POLITICAL

Into the Winter

With the flurry of High Holidays behind us, we “descend” into the Jewish winter of the year. Simply named as such because we don’t have anything major to celebrate, so to speak, until Hanukkah. On a deeper level, we go into the “growth stage” of winter where the seeds of what we want to accomplish lie under the dirt, pounded by the rain and wind, seemingly dead to the world while deep inside there is a slow, steady growth.

So how do we face the “winters” of our lives, where change doesn’t come fast enough, or the results we seek seem out of reach? What insights might we leverage from our sources to give us frameworks to handle the challenges?

Judaism teaches two concepts, emunah and bitachon. Emunah means, on the surface, faith. Bitachon is applied faith: acting in accordance to what you know is true. The Torah teaches us to embrace this perspective, assuring us that even in the face of adversity, there is a purpose. We are taught to see challenges as opportunities for personal growth and development. By nurturing faith and trust, you can find the strength to overcome life's hurdles with hope and purpose, recognizing that everything you encounter is tailored to you to allow you to reach your ideal.

Reflecting on the Torah portions found in the first two books, Genesis and Exodus, we also see the context for “winter,” stories of all of our patriarchs and matriarchs facing down challenge after challenge. From Abraham's

unwavering faith to the Israelites' trials in the desert, these stories reveal a fundamental lesson: adversity is a profound teacher. The Torah encourages you to reflect on your own life experiences, learn from them, and use that knowledge to empower your future.

In addition, consider the value of adaptability and flexibility when life takes unexpected turns. Think of Joseph, who thrived by adapting to life's ever-changing circumstances. Starting as the favored son, falling to the role of prisoner and then rising again to rule Egypt, Joseph focused exclusively on the task at hand and the role he saw G-d placing him in. He forgave his brothers and rebuilt the Jewish people for their future in Egypt. No one would have faulted him for failing and giving up every step of the way, but his model of dealing with “winter” allowed him to consistently thrive.

When things really go south (or even somewhat south), lean on the community. Sometimes the easiest way forward is not to deal with our

particular challenge but to stand by our fellow human beings during tough times. Building resilience is not a solitary journey; it's about seeking and o ering support from others. When you feel beleaguered, find people to pull you up and people who you can pull up. When you shift the focus from yourself to your community, you find yourself focusing less on the pain you experience and more on the pleasure of supporting and supporting others.

And finally, seek to focus on gratitude. Gratitude is perhaps the most recurring theme in Judaism. Our very name, Yehudi, means to be grateful. We are consistently trained to focus on what we have, the blessings in our lives, as a recurring theme to find happiness and success. Negative thoughts and positive thoughts are both contagious and the faster we can focus on what’s going right, the easier we can generate positive thoughts and solutions.

After a particularly challenging year in Yeshiva, I remember almost coming undone to one of my mentors. I felt like I was lost, with no idea of what I was doing or if I had accomplished anything. He reminded me of this concept of the “winter” and how, if you just recognize that this is a season like every other season, you’ll value the work instead of just wishing it gone. And in retrospect, I wish I had actually enjoyed the process more. Eventually, everything works out. We just have to borrow that perspective in the future and live it now. A

Seek to focus on gratitude. Gratitude is perhaps the most recurring theme in Judaism.

LITERATURE WRITTEN IN FIRE

tremcneil1980@gmail.com

Laughing Into the Abyss

The formation of new phrases is far from an exact science. More a matter of random chance, there is no telling what might go into common usage later on. Shakespeare, a fairly popular South Bank entertainer in his own time, unwittingly added roughly 1,700 words to the English language.

Someone else to achieve a rather more modest feat was the American author Joseph Heller. Random chance and basically blind luck leading him to title his 1962 novel “Catch-22.” A concept and phrase that continues to this day, largely as an example in logical philosophy.

Adding to the irony of an o -thecu title and initially throw-away line therein, is the fact that, as with much of Heller’s intentions, it had started o as a joke. Heller being one of the most successful and straight-faced satirists in 20th-century letters.

More gentle than others taking on the powers that be, especially at the time, such as Franz Ka a or Harlan Ellison who tended to be more pointed in their criticisms, Heller was always more in the Horatian tradition of satire. (Named for the Ancient Roman poet Horace, Horatian refers to a satire that is less cruel or specific, instead gently ridiculing the absurdities of humans and their institutions, the ultimate goal being a smile of recognition.)

Heller’s most famous work is his 1961 novel “Catch-22” and the 1970 film of the same name. A cunningly subtle

black comedy, set during WWII, the novel exposes the deadly absurdities of not only large-scale conflict, but the protocols of those involved, requiring largely ine ective if not outright ridiculous bureaucracy to oversee it.

This becomes most clear when it is pointed out that the main character, American fighter pilot Yossarian, is told he can’t be grounded on grounds of insanity. He would have to be insane to want to fly missions, so if he asks not to fly them he can’t be crazy and has to fly missions. A situation described as “catch-22.”

Far from being seen as the breakout it turned out to be, Heller only ever meant for it to be at most the length of a novelette, the eventual page count (453) surprised him most of all. He had originally stopped writing with only one-third of the manuscript finished, deciding not to go on if no one was

interested. The chunk he had was sold to Simon & Schuster within a month.

Far from a one-trick pony, Heller actually published a further seven novels over the next 37 years, published six collections of short stories and scripts for stage, film and television, including an episode of the war sitcom “McHale’s Navy” in 1962.

Lightening up a little, his post “Catch-22” work took a page from Jane Austen by focusing largely on the relatable absurdities of the middle class, especially the promises of suburbia made after WWII, getting somewhat undercut by the late Vietnam era.

His first major literary work after “Catch-22” was “Something Happened” published in 1974. Considered by some to be Heller’s best work, the novel is constructed of a personal narrative from the point of view of a businessman, getting ready for a promotion at work. It has a delivery similar to “The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin” by David Nobbs, which was published a year later.

Delving into many aspects of life, Heller used him as a focal point or microcosm of Middle America at the time.

In a similar vein, “Good As Gold” features a protagonist, in this case a Jewish professor of English, who could be considered successful according to the standards of society, despite being loathed by almost everyone, with the exception of those who outright ignore

continues on next page >>

Heller worked as an apprentice, messenger boy and file clerk, giving valuable insight into both hard labor and the workings of bureaucracy.

Written in Fire continued

him. A situation he gets the chance to change after a surprising o er from the sitting president.

“G-d Knows,” published in 1984, takes a slightly di erent approach than anything Heller had done before. Another narrative work, the point of view character in this case is King David of Israel in what is described, in the context of the novel, as being his memoirs.

Heller’s slightly absurdist view of the world, as reflected in his novels, makes sense in the context of his background. Born to poor Russian Jewish immigrants in New York, he worked as an apprentice, messenger boy and file clerk, giving valuable insight into both hard labor and the workings of bureaucracy.

In 1942 he joined the Air Corps, flying a reported 60 bombing missions during WWII, making “Catch-22” very much a case of “write what you know.”

Refusing to let the bastards get him down, Heller took the opportunity to go to college on the G.I. Bill and earned a B.A. in English from USC, before going on to get an M.A. from Columbia. He levereaged his experience into a position as a Fulbright scholar at Oxford University before teaching at Penn State, while also writing. A

Israeli Lifestyle continued

they are personal, centered on self, it is so easy to disappoint and or cheat oneself.

Dwelling in a sukkah evokes thoughts of life’s fragility and helps keep High Holy Days resolutions a tad more poignant and worthy of extra e ort. Born of dust, returning to dust, how much time will we remain angry with a child, a spouse or a boss? Ignoring the brevity of a lifespan, how much envy is spent on seeing what others have, what a sibling earns, the e ortless beauty of another gal in our Pilates class? When will we address a miserly nature which encourages one to hold back desperately needed and available funds, compassion and/or tolerance, especially when we ourselves are in need of sustenance, compassion and tolerance?

A sukkah can be built on a patio, in a parking lot, a beautifully landscaped garden or city fire escape. For me, the most important sukkah is the one I’m continually trying to erect within my heart and dwell there throughout the year in order that the resolutions I earnestly made will not fade but, rather, expand and keep me, my family and entire community of man, tethered to Heaven. A

Big Changes Coming to Scripps Medicare Beneficiaries

Beginning Jan. 1, 2024, Scripps Coastal Medical Center and Scripps Clinic will no longer take Medicare Advantage plans. Beneficiaries receiving services through these Scripps organizations will lose their providers unless they switch to another Medicare plan. This change will a ect 40,000 San Diego seniors.

“They’re either going to have to pay a lot more money for a traditional plan, or they’re going to have to switch gears altogether and go to another medical group,” said Tina Bernard, a sales representative at SBHIS Insurance Services. “The challenge is, where do you move 40,000 people from an institution as large as Scripps into other medical groups? So, it’s very disruptive to the community.”

Oct. 15 through Dec. 7, 2023 is the open enrollment period for Medicare. Beneficiaries must choose either their new plan or a new provider during this time.

Traditional Medicare — Parts A and B — cover hospital and outpatient medical services. Drug coverage, known as Medicare Part D, can be added separately. However, these traditional plans only cover 80% of the cost. Medicare Supplements, otherwise known as Medigap, can be

purchased to cover this remaining 20%. Unfortunately, this comes with a monthly premium. For this reason, many people opt for Medicare Advantage. This option operates as an HMO with many plans including drug coverage and some services that traditional Medicare does not cover, like dental and vision.

If an a ected beneficiary is looking to stay with their provider at Scripps Coastal Medical Center or Scripps Clinic, switching from Medicare Advantage to Medicare Part B and an additional Medicare Supplement will allow them to stay with that provider. However, their premiums could be more than $300 per month, as opposed to the $0 they previously paid.

is also talk of this happening to other medical groups in San Diego.

“We’re in a disruptive situation right now, and seniors need to know that this is happening and they need to know that there are people they can turn to for help,” Pat said. “They’re not alone. It’s not unique to Scripps right now. We have UCSD Medical Group with two formal terminations on the table already.”

If switching to Medicare Part B and an additional Medicare Supplement, unfortunately, new members have to deal with underwriting: an eligibility review based on health history and conditions. Pat says that those a ected by the Scripps change will automatically be accepted into a Medicare Supplement plan if they choose, without the underwriting.

“So it’s a blessing in disguise for some,” Pat added, “because they’ll be able to get a product that maybe they’ve been wanting.”

The upcoming change can be confusing, a ecting all people across the board.

Pat Salas, CEO of SBHIS Insurance Services, believes that the agency is prepared to help San Diego seniors with the upcoming changes in any way they can.

“We will have a call center with 60 people and answer the phone all day long...We’re really good at what we do... which means we really care. So we’re quite invested in our members,” she said. “You know, we treat [members] like they’re family, and the goal is to provide them with their options once a year to make sure that they’re in the plan that makes the most sense for them, that saves them the most money, and that works.”

There is no clear explanation as to why this change is happening at Scripps Coastal Medical Center and Scripps Clinic, but Pat says it is financial. There

“We’re just dealing with di erent demographics. You’re going to have people who can a ord the Medicare Supplement, and they’re just going to move over there because it’s a nonissue. You’re going have people who can a ord it and they’re going to be resistant to spending that money; they’re very budget and value-conscious, and that’s it. Then you’re going to have those who are not in a financial position [to switch],” said Tina.

“The important thing for them to know is that if they have an agent such as myself, there are so many programs and information that we have access to to help them get resources beyond just Medicare insurance,” she added. A

If you are a Scripps member and would like more information on the upcoming changes, you can contact SBHIS Insurance Services at 858-201-2667.

people they can turn to for help. happening and that there are Seniors need to know what is

Sitting Around the Table

When going to a restaurant we might look at the menu and discover we can order a five-course meal with dessert, co ee or tea and enjoy the chef’s decision. We might order one or two items, basically whatever we think we can eat, or we might order co ee and a sweet dessert because we just want a quick snack. And there are those that may just order a cup of co ee.

Many Jews look at Judaism the way we look at our food consumption. There’s the “Inclusive” Jew who is a synagogue member and goes to synagogue almost all Shabbats and holidays. Usually the “Inclusive” will celebrate all Jewish Holidays at home and in the synagogue. The “Inclusive” Jew generally has a positive love of Judaism. The “Inclusive” Jew takes advantage of extra opportunities to discuss Jewish events in and about Israel, the United States and all about Judaism’s past, present and future. Usually, everything that happens in the life of the “Inclusive” Jew takes on a Jewish context. The “Inclusive” Jew will often check the Jewish calendar to determine what Jewish Holiday or experience will soon be required. Most of the family needs include Jewish needs. A close look at the Jewish family life of

the “Inclusive” Jew would reflect the love of one another and the strong interest of the goings on of the Jewish community. Then there is the “À La Carte” Jew who usually is a member of a synagogue and who will attend synagogue often. They are Jews who might say, “Judaism is for special occasions like High Holidays, Passover and Hanukkah.” The children of “À La Carte” Jews usually become a bar or bat mitzvah and they generally will attend the b’nai mitzvah of their friends and relatives. The “À La Carte” children usually enjoy the family membership of the synagogue because of their youth group experiences. The close contact of families and friends and the minimal pressure put on family and friends creates the positive environment of the “À La Carte” Jewish experience.

The next grouping would be the “Quick Snack.” The “Quick Snack” is the Jew who thinks of his or her Judaism as a little bit here and a little bit there, but seldom as a full life experience. There are a number of circumstances where the “Quick Snack” is needed. Jews who are not members of synagogues are often caught o guard when a parent, relative, or a close friend passes away. Also there is the situation when a wedding or baby

naming is about to take place and there has been little or no knowledge as to what to do next. The “Quick Snack” might call upon a Jewish friend who practices “À La Carte” and can recommend a Rabbi to take care of ritual needs. When the baby naming or funeral or wedding is over, there can be future contact with the Rabbi (who can become a positive leader for that family). The services of the Rabbi can bring about warmth.

The last group, I call the “Just A Cup of Java Please.” This group is a wonderful group of people whose origin could be from anywhere in the world. The group is generally made up of Israelis. The ‘Java Please’ group is often fluent in Hebrew and English.

What we forget and often ignore is that because of our love of Judaism and the Jewish People, we are theoretically all seated at the same table in the same restaurant and ordering from the same menu.

It is my hope that the Jewish groups I have described can reach out to each other’s communities and bring our Jewishness together for peace and harmony. The religious and the secular need to smile and establish loving connections. A

Seacrest Foundation Presents “Take a Swing for Seniors”

This

“Proceeds from the ‘Take a Swing for Seniors’ event goes to Seacrest Foundation and will directly benefit the Resident Assistance Fund, which is a special fund that provides charitable care to residents that need financial aid at Seacrest Village Retirement

Communities,” said event chair Robert Haimsohn. “Charitable care helps with the cost of daily living such as rent, utilities, meals, nursing or assisted living care, memory care, transportation and housekeeping. It also provides for life enrichment events, outings and social activities that are crucial to the wellbeing of seniors.”

Over 150 participants are expected to attend at the Park Hyatt Aviara Resort &

Golf Club. Players of all levels and skills are welcome to attend. This year will include the return of the spa portion of the event, featuring the newly renovated Aviara Miraval spa.

According to the Foundation, “All registration fees include a welcome lunch, tournament or spa participation, a special gift, multiple contests and awards, green/court fees, complimentary snacks and beverages, access to the

Take a Swing continued

resort facilities, hosted hors d’oeuvres and cocktails at the awards ceremony.”

The golf portion of the event includes longest drive, closest to the pin, straightest drive and hole-in-one. There are special prizes for winners and the first-place golf and top tennis and pickleball players will have their names engraved on the trophy that is housed at Seacrest Foundation.

In addition to the sports and spa, the event will hold an online auction, a ra e drawing for $1,000 cash and a mystery bottle of red or white wine.

Items featured in the online auction include: Golf foursomes at Fairmont Grand Del Mar, Morgan Run, Aviara and Hillcrest Country Club; private, gourmet, wine-paired dinner for 10 at Pamplemousse Grille; fine jewelry designer bracelets from ALOR; $1,000 gift certificate to Petrossian Restaurant & Boutique; and VIP Wine Tastings in Napa.

The Seacrest Foundation works with Guardians of San Diego to bring the event to the community.

“Guardians [of San Diego] is a dedicated group of volunteers that have worked with Seacrest Foundation for over 50 years to raise funds to support the charitable care needs of Seacrest Village Retirement Communities,” Robert said. “They organize the annual ‘Take a Swing for Seniors’ Golf, Tennis, Pickleball, and Spa event, which is always successful, fun, and well-attended and has raised over $2 million over the years to help care for San Diego’s elderly.”

Robert says that everyone from the local community to visitors from as far as Los Angeles travels to attend the event. Even Seacrest residents are welcome to join in on the fun. A

If you are interested in participating in the “Take a Swing for Seniors” Golf, Tennis, Pickleball & Spa Day, visit seacrestfoundation.org/golftennis.

Over the years, the event has raised over $2 million to help care for San Diego’s elderly.

Jewish Riders Club Seeks New Members

Shalom and Chrome of Southern California is a group of Jewish riders and part of the Jewish Motorcycle Alliance. They hold an annual fundraiser for Holocaust awareness. Shalom and Chrome is accepting new members. Contact President Steven Ratner at stevenratner@gmail.com.

Shabbat and Free Short Films at the JCC

Public Showing of Documentary “J’Accuse!” at the JCC

On Nov. 5, 2023 at 10 a.m., the JCC will be holding a public viewing of the film “J’Accuse!”, including a talk with director Michael Kretzmer. The awardwinning documentary tells the story of the Lithuanian Holocaust. Following two individuals whose families were directly a ected by the Holocaust, the story covers the rape, dehumanization and torture that over 200,000 Lithuanian Jews faced. The film has seen audiences in America, Israel, South Africa, England, and Australia. Visit lfjcc.org/jaccuse to register for this free viewing.

Five short films from around the world will be played at the JCC on Oct. 14 at 4 p.m. The event takes place at the Joyce Forum; tickets are free. Rabbi Yael Ridberg will lead a Havdalah experience after the viewing and light dinner. Visit bit.ly/46hksly for reservations.

Parachutist

“The film depicts the life of a downtrodden Ethiopian immigrant family through the eyes of the young boy Eli, who tries to live out his dream of becoming a parachutist by playing with plastic bags.”

Requiem for a Fish

“In a touching testament to his grandfather, an amateur diver he never met, director Gadi Rimer delivers a portrait of a unique Israeli pioneer. In Hebrew, subtitles in English.”

The Peacock That Passed Over

“A peacock mysteriously appeared on the grounds of a synagogue in Leeds, England four years ago, and never left. This whimsical film explores the responses from various members of this Yorkshire community.”

Reality Show

“After a music reality show contestant brings cameras into his parents’ home for an interview, the parents are asked to stage an argument to make it more interesting, revealing more than intended.”

Sevap/Mitzvah

“Zejneba realizes Sarajevo’s Jews are being rounded up by Nazis, putting her friend Rifka and Rifka’s family in danger, she risks everything to save them. Fifty years later, during the Bosnian War, it’s the Muslims who are being hunted down and Rifka has to find a way to rescue Zejneba and her family in turn.”

Free Showing of an Original Opera

Hillel of San Diego at UCSD will be showing an exclusive video concert preview of “The Golem of La Jolla” on Oct. 9 from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m.

“A prominent La Jolla synagogue is persuaded to accept a supernatural and unorthodox solution to ward o a violent White Nationalist march to their door.”

The opera was composed by Michael Roth with librettist Allan Havis. Roth and Havis will come together to speak about the piece and its inception. It premiered at La Jolla Playhouse’s WoW Festival in 2019. Visit bit.ly/3t3x4hU to reserve free tickets.

Solar Eclipse Viewing Party

The Fleet Science Center will be holding a viewing party for the solar eclipse on Saturday, Oct. 14. The event is free and The Fleet will provide complimentary NASA 3-D eclipse glasses. San Diegans will experience a partial eclipse.

The eclipse will begin at 8:09 a.m. The climax, when the Moon is closest to the center of the Sun, will be visible from San Diego at 9:26 a.m. Viewers will see the most exciting moments between 8:45 and 9:45 a.m., with the eclipse concluding at 10:52 a.m.

Lisa Will, Ph.D., The Fleet’s resident astronomer, along with additional local astronomy and eclipse experts, will be on hand to answer questions and converse.

New Festival In Little Italy This October

This year marks the inaugural Bella Vita Festival in Little Italy on Oct. 21 and 22, including more than 50 live chalk art paintings in addition to food and music. The festival was developed by ArtWalk San Diego and has been in the works for five years.

Little Italy has not had a chalk painting festival since 2016. The Bella Vita Festival was created to celebrate the artistry and tradition of the madonnari, famous Italian street painters.

Day passes are $15, and wine-tasting passes are $50. Proceeds from the event go toward the Little Italy Association of San Diego. Go to bellavitafest.com/tickets to purchase tickets.

Local O erings

BROADWAY SAN DIEGO

broadwaysd.com

Broadway-San Diego is bringing back the musical masterpiece, “Les Miséables” for a brief run at the Civic Theatre, Oct. 3-15. This brilliant work, based on the epic novel, has everything theater-goers could want in a musical theater piece – a powerful plot, stunning visuals and clever musical numbers.

CYGNET THEATRE

cygnettheatre.com

Cygnet Theatre will unveil a world premiere on Oct. 25. “The Little Fellow (or The Queen of Tarts Tells All”) is a historical drama that sounds fascinating. You have through Nov. 19 to see for yourself.

CORONADO PLAYHOUSE

coronadoplayhouse.org

Coronado Playhouse is mounting a production of the musical, “Xanadu,” Oct. 20 through Nov. 12.

LA JOLLA PLAYHOUSE

lajollaplayhouse.org

THRU OCT. 22: Sumo

This play focuses on an elite training facility in Tokyo dedicated to this martial arts form. It will pound out its saga to the beat of taiko drumming.

LAMB’S PLAYERS THEATRE

lambsplayers.org

The Lamb’s Players Theatre has an exciting world premiere on its stage. “Jane” is an adaptation of Charlotte Bronte’s masterwork, “Jane Eyre” and should be a hit with fans of the novel and plays until Nov. 12.

NEW VILLAGE ARTS

newvillagearts.org

New Village Arts is staging the provocative, Tony Award-winning “Doubt” at its Carlsbad home through Oct. 22.

NORTH COAST REP

northcoastrep.org

On Oct. 18, the unsettling world of “Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde” takes over NCRT’s Solana Beach home. The suspenseful drama has been described as “wicked and witty, passionate and terrifying.” It will keep audiences spellbound with its twists and turns through Nov. 12

SAN DIEGO INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL

sdfilmfest.org

San Diego International Film Festival will run Oct. 18 – 22, with a kicko reception and screening at the Museum of Photographic Arts.

SAN DIEGO MUSEUM OF ART

sdmart.org

The San Diego Museum of Art’s current exhibition of “Carlo Miranda: In Search of Sonder,” will be on view through Nov. 19.

SAN DIEGO OPERA

sdopera.org

The San Diego Opera will launch its season with a special concert, starring Latonia Moore and J’Nai Bridges. The performance is slated for Oct. 25 at the Balboa Theater, with accompaniment from the San Diego Symphony.

THE LA JOLLA MUSIC SOCIETY

theconrad.org

The La Jolla Music Society will kick o its season on Oct. 7 with Isata Kanneh-Mason on the keyboard, followed on the 13th by the Thibaudet/Batiashvili/Capucon Trio. Mariachi Herencia de Mexico & Marisol “La Marisoul” Hernandez is next on Oct. 15. Lila Dows performs on Oct. 22, followed by Banda Magda, to close out the month on Oct. 27.

THE OLD GLOBE THEATRE

theoldglobe.org

THRU OCT. 29: Dishwasher Dreams

The Globe’s theater-in-the-round is gearing up for the West Coast premiere of “Dishwasher Dreams,” an exploration of the American dream. This autobiographical solo play takes audiences on an emotional journey of discovery from 1930s Bangladesh to present-day Hollywood, through music and comedy.

Food

Sherbet for a Refreshing Dessert

When the temperatures are high, you may be looking for a cooling dessert. Sherbet is estimated to have originated in 6th century Persia. It is derived from the Arabic word “shariba” meaning “to drink.”

Fresh Mint Sherbet

MAKES 4 CUPS

Strawberry-Wine Sherbet

MAKES 2 PINTS

INGREDIENTS:

•1 envelope unflavored gelatin

•1 cup sugar

•4 ¼ cups water

•⅔ cup lemon juice

•2 tbsp. minced fresh mint

PREPARATION:

1.Mix gelatin and sugar with 1 cup water in a saucepan over medium heat. Stir until dissolved, about 5 minutes.

2. Remove from heat and stir in 3 ¼ cups water, lemon juice and mint. Stir into a freezer container and freeze until slushy.

3. Remove from the freezer. Beat until foamy, return to the freezer again until slushy.

4. Remove, beat until foamy and freeze until firm.

INGREDIENTS:

•¾ cup water

•⅔ cup sugar

•2 pints cleaned strawberries

•¾ cup fruity white wine

•1 tbsp. lemon juice

PREPARATION:

1.Place water and sugar in a saucepan and cook until sugar dissolves. Simmer for 3 minutes and cool.

2. Puree strawberries in a food processor and add to syrup. Let sit for 30 minutes.

3. Add wine and lemon juice, stir then pour into a freezer container and freeze for 2-4 hours. Stir after 1 hour and again at 2 hours.

4. Food process until smooth and flu y. Refreeze for 30 minutes. Food process again, cover and freeze 1-2 hours.

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How Adam Sandler’s ‘You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah’ imitates real life, from its stars to its parties

The world of extravagant, euphoric and angst-charged parties for 13-year-olds is the setting of Sandler’s new comedy, a coming-of-age drama that is also an onscreen vehicle for his real-life Jewish family. Sandler plays the befuddled, uncool dad Danny Friedman to Stacy and Ronnie Friedman, portrayed by his real-life daughters, Sunny and Sadie Sandler, while his wife Jackie Sandler has a smaller role as the mother of Stacy’s best friend Lydia.

The friendship between Stacy and Lydia makes up the backbone of the film, which is based on Fiona Rosenbloom’s 2005 book of the same name. The two girls start out planning

their dream bat mitzvah parties together, but a rift over Hebrew school stud Andy Goldfarb (Dylan Ho man) threatens to destroy both their friendship and their Jewish rites of passage.

The film shows Stacy practicing her Torah portion; agonizing over her “mitzvah project,” a service initiative that many congregations encourage; and meeting with her hipster, often-on-the-treadmill rabbi, played by comedian Sarah Sherman. (The movie, directed by Sammi Cohen and written by Allison Peck, filmed in part at a real Toronto Conservative synagogue, Beth Tzedec.) A

Active Aging Replaces Retirement: It’s all About Purpose in Life

The time has finally come to permanently toss out the word “retirement” and replace it with “active aging.” What once felt like an end is a dynamic new beginning.

The Lawrence Family Jewish Community Center has created a comprehensive 10-week program for those who are ready to embrace the next chapter with stamina and meaning. It’s a reinvigorated continuation of life, filled with building a nourishing community and cultivating purpose. The program focuses on expanding one’s community and relationships; it is not your typical financial lecture on retirement.

According to Jordan Fruchtman, Chief Program O cer at the Lawrence Family Jewish Community Center (LFJCC) and originator of this program, “This expansive pathway provides a plethora of practical new considerations and opportunities no longer to just fill your life, but to create one that is truly fulfilled. Some may even suggest we have now created a ‘new frontier’ for our Boomers.”

“Our approach has positioned relationships as our principal or core focus — content of the courses is secondary to the conversation,” Fruchtman said. “Boomers have become a substantial portion of today’s population (17%), and in the next ten years there will be

more people over 65 than children in the United States. Their quest for continuing purpose is perpetual. It was with all this in mind that we shaped and structured the curriculum,” he added.

The program was first introduced a few months ago and immediately filled to capacity. Fruchtman was not surprised, as members of the community were intrigued by the content. “I was actually elated when I received calls after the program ended, informing me of cohorts staying connected through lunches, dinners and home gatherings. In fact, some cohorts were actually creating companies together to better serve boomers who desire to assist local companies as accomplished executives with valuable experience and knowledge [who are] respected by many entrepreneurial companies here.”

The program will o er ten, 2-hour courses on three di erent weekdays, a 3-month membership to the JCC and a private coaching session with one of the highly experienced executive and retirement coaches.

The course fee is $500.00. A scholarship fund has also been established.

For more information, visit lfjcc.org/RA or call Jordan Fruchtman at 858.362.1123.

Marnie Takes On Seniors

Shalom my dear San Diegans: I just passed one of “those” B-days. I am now at the age where I can start using “halves” and “days” when asked my age. Yes, life is a circle. A toddler will say, “I am 2 and a half.” I can now say, “I am 98 and 31 days.” As an MOT, today I’m taking on two questions from others knee-deep in AARP o ers. As I am branding my Strategic Relationship Thinking method (SRT), let me show you how it works with a lovely senior in love.

Dear Marnie: Here I am at 61 and confused about love. Help! After having a failed marriage after 20 years, I divorced and later fell in love with a man that I thought was the love of my life. We were only together for a few years when he left. I was devastated and vowed I would never marry again. However, I did begin to date an extremely nice, decent man with good qualities. I feel very comfortable with him and I know that he loves me deeply. Here's my question: Since I didn't see any warning signs in this last failed relationship, I don't trust my judgment, but I don't want to be alone either. Please advise on love after 60. — Senior Needs Love Help in San Diego

MARNIE SAYS: “All my thoughts?” My dear you are a brave soul! But, as you’ve described your dilemma so well, my strategies and thoughts are all about

what you wrote. Now, I could tell you to make lists of clues you missed with loves past and set up red flags next to each. I won’t. Here’s why. You’re thinking incorrectly. You don’t mean to. But your beliefs and presumptions are false and that’s what’s getting to you. Here’s yours. “Because things didn’t work out, it must be me. So, why should I trust my judgments?”

Your Personal Strategies: Things got screwed up. Examples: failed marriage after 20 years and midlife hot guy who left. So you assume, “Oh it’s got to be me. More, my life is one big catastrophe.” Incorrect. Faulty.

Strategy: Correct your thinking. Ready? Read the following with feeling.

•I kept a marriage together for 20 years!

•In midlife I attracted a toe-curler who hung around for a few years of hallelujah loving!

•At 61, an adoring suitor still wants to whoop-de-doo with me — and more!

Strategy: This is proof–reality.

See it? Now repeat it. Sing it. Because that is you. You can choose to define your life by the “what went wrongs” or you can see it with love and truth. You’ve been pleasured and given pleasure for almost a half century — and you’re still in the game.

Strategy: You can’t you say?

You bet you can. If you get rid of those nasty beliefs that are mucking up your soul and vision. Let’s list them. I’ll start.

•“My husband left after 20. It’s my fault. I’m a total loser-failure.”

•“Toe-tingler left and I’m so clueless I made a speed bump shrewd.”

•“I like this current man, but what do I know?” (With the strains of “no wonder they all leave...” echoing.)

Strategy: Challenge each one of your errant beliefs with proof and truth. I’ll start:

•“There were good years with my ex. Maybe I stayed too long, maybe not; but hey, maybe I needed to do that. And who hasn’t erred or had rotten timing? I’m human and still one heck of a woman.” Need proof? List all the accomplishments of that pairing. Kids? Career? Managing to survive with verve — and wisdom.

•“Even when I thought my last lover was my soulmate and I missed a few clues or perhaps he’s a great ‘hider,’ not every love — even the ones I believed in — will work out. I’m not clairvoyant. Sometimes, even the good ones go or I let them. It happens. It hurts. But not every breakup is within my control. I’m still one heck of a woman.”

Strategy: Tell yourself, “I make way more good judgments than I’ve make lousy ones.” Proof? No woman could attract people and keep burning bright if their life is mostly lousy choices. (Sheesh!) Repeat it. Now write down some more of your outstanding choices.

Strategy: Record the following: “I will not think in absolutes. I will not define my worth by my mistakes.” No. My mistakes are my best teachers. Perfection is a myth. Boom! “And finally, no matter what, I’m still one heck of a woman. A woman who has both faults and magic.”

The point, my friend, is to quit abusing yourself with silly self-doubt and evil conclusions. Once you start upon this path of new STRATEGIC thinking, you may permit yourself to let your intuition, experience and brains do the thinking, in other words, the simple act of trusting you enough to let yourself go.

Now go climb, because my friend you haven’t even seen the top of that hill! A

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From the novella Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson

Winston Churchill is back!

DEFENDING LIBERTY

NOVEMBER 6 & 7 @ 7:30 PM

NOVEMBER 7 @ 2PM

Focusing on strong leadership and core principles, Randy Otto as Winston Churchill returns to caution humanity about a new threat — not from Nazis or Communism, but a Digital Iron Curtain shrouding liberty.

TUESDAY NIGHT COMICS

Hosted by Mark Christopher Lawrence

NOVEMBER 14 @ 7:30 PM

Arguably the funniest night of comedy in San Diego. MCL taps into his extensive list of talented comedian friends and shares the North Coast Rep stage with them.

(Rated R)

I’M NOT A COMEDIAN... I’M LENNY BRUCE

NOV 30-DEC 3 @ 7:30 PM

DEC 2 & 3 @ 2PM

starring ronnie marmo

Experience a daring reimagining of Robert Louis Stevenson’s timeless tale, filled with darkness, desire, love, and unbridled terror. In Je rey Hatcher’s gripping drama, we delve deep into the human psyche, exploring the eternal conflict between good and evil. Relentless forces engage in a deadly and electrifying cat-and-mouse showdown, vying for ultimate domination. Hatcher masterfully invites the audience to question their loyalties, blurring the lines between right and wrong, leaving us all in suspense. Prepare to be enchanted by this wickedly clever and sharply witty narrative, infused with passion and chilling suspense. It’s the perfect choice for thrill-seekers who crave a spine-tingling experience that captures the essence of the season.

Directed by Shana Wride

October 18–November 12

northcoastrep.org

box office: 858-481-1055 | group sales: 858-481-2155, x202

Directed by Joe Mantegna

Ronnie Marmo’s crowd-shocking portrayal of the undisputed comic legend, Lenny Bruce, brings the notorious funnyman to life with electrifying, insightful and comedic brilliance. (Rated R: Explicit language, Mature Content & very brief Nudity.)

2 PIANOS 4 HANDS DECEMBER 15-31

By Ted

and Richard Greenblatt

Get ready for an interlude of riotous laughter as Je erson McDonald and Matthew McGloin take us on a musical comedic journey while playing everything from Bach to Billy Joel.

scan for new season lineup & packages

“Smart, tenseand suspenseful.”

— SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE