Do You Wanna Dance? One-Act Edition by Music Theatre International

I B R E T T O

O C A L

O O K

ONE ACT VERSION

Mark

Book by Brymer and John

Jacobson

Music Adapted and Arranged by

Mark Brymer

All music, lyrics and dialogue contained in this book are the property of the Authors and are fully protected by copyright. Your organization’s performance license prohibits making any changes of any kind to the Play, including changes of music, lyrics, dialogue, sequence of songs and/or scenes, time period, setting, characters or characterizations or gender of characters in the Play, including interpolating new material (such as songs from any other version of the Play) and/or omitting existing material. Any changes shall constitute a willful infringement of the authors’ copyright and may subject your organization to civil liabilities and criminal penalties under the United States Copyright Act and other applicable statutes. This book is the property of MTI and must be returned at the conclusion of your production. You may not duplicate any portion of these materials, disseminate them in any way, in whole or in part, including electronic or digital transmission and posting on the Internet, or use them for performances other than those specified in your organization’s license agreement. Federal and international copyright law prohibit the public performance of the enclosed material without a performance license. MTI's delivery of the enclosed material does not authorize you or your group to perform the enclosed show(s) in any manner whatsoever. For example, it does not matter whether your audience pays for their tickets or not; it does not matter if your group is a school or not. The law requires you to obtain a license prior to performing the enclosed material. For further information regarding the penalties for copyright infringement, please visit www.copyright.gov. To report any violation of the above terms, contact at MTI at licensing@mtishows.com.

(Last Revised — June 2018)

C H A R AC T E R B R E A K D OW N LEAD ACTORS: DELANEY DUZWELL Delaney is a Senior, full of positive energy, at Snaphappy High. She is well-liked and natural leader at the High School. With her strong and upbeat character, Delaney can motivate all the other youth of Snaphappy. Dancing is her life. Age Range: 16-18 Gender: Female Vocal Range Top: C5 Vocal Range Bottom: G3 CHAD LIGHTFOOT Chad is the son of the town Mayor and a Senior at Snaphappy High. He’s a good kid, into sports as well as singing and dancing. Yet, there is a certain vulnerability in Chad due to the loss of his mom and his struggle to accept his new stepmother. He becomes Delaney’s boyfriend during the show. Age Range: 16-18 Gender: Male Vocal Range Top: F#4 Vocal Range Bottom: G3 MAYOR PETE LIGHTFOOT Mayor Lightfoot is an affable and beloved mayor who wants to do what is best for the town of Snaphappy. Unfortunately, he is blinded by his feelings for his new wife and easily allows her to lead him down a misguided path, much to the dismay of his son, Chad. Age Range: 40-60 Gender: Male MONA LIGHTFOOT Mona is the Mayor ’s complicated new wife. She has is a severe dancing phobia. When she arrives in Snaphappy her fears are laid bare when she learns that the entire town loves to dance. To mask her insecurity she behaves like a tyrant, alienating almost everybody, especially Chad. She insists on having things her way until she is finally won over by the accepting Townsfolk. Age Range: 30-50 Gender: Female Vocal Range Top: C5 Vocal Range Bottom: Ab3

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LUCAS Lucas is a true jock but not much of a dancer—or so he thinks. He is Chad’s best friend and fairly awkward with girls, until he meets Emma. Everything she does simply amazes him. Age Range: 16-18 Gender: Male Vocal Range Top: Bb4 Vocal Range Bottom: Bb3 EMMA Emma is an exuberant cheerleader and Delaney’s long time best friend. She is also more than a little infatuated with Lucas whom she impresses with her amazing flexibility and athleticism. For Emma there is always a reason to cartwheel, flip or do a jump or the splits. Age Range: 15-18 Gender: Female Vocal Range Top: Bb4 Vocal Range Bottom: Bb3 DAPHNE DUZWELL Daphne is Delaney’s mother and is the co-owner, with her husband Don, of the D-D-D Dance Studio. She has the same spunk as her daughter, Delaney. With a heart of gold, she loves her husband and all her dance students, which includes everybody in town. Age Range: 40-50 Gender: Female Vocal Range Top: D5 Vocal Range Bottom: A3 DON DUZWELL Don is Delaney’s father and co-owner of the D-D-D Dance Studio. He is a bit square and more of a worrier than Daphne, together, they manage to keep their Dance Studio afloat. Age Range: 40-50 Gender: Male PRINCIPAL MR. WIZZLE or Ms. WIZZLE He/she is the principal of the high school and a bit of a busy body. He/she loves all the students but is reluctant to buck the town leadership. Mr. or Ms. Wizzle is constantly irritated that everyone makes fun of their name—(Wizzle—not Weasel) Age Range: 35-104 Gender: Male or Female Vocal Range Top: D4 Vocal Range Bottom: G3

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MRS. SUSAN MANSFORD Susan is a mother and a student at D-D-D Dance Studio. She sings and dances with relish, but can be prone to faint in public. She is one of the Townsfolk and has a featured duet in “Shake your Groove Thing”. Age Range: 35-50 Gender: Female Vocal Range Top: C5 Vocal Range Bottom: E4 MR. BOB MANSFORD Mr. Mansford is a father and a student at the D-D-D- Dance Studio, and quite the dancer. His wife, Susan, keeps him on his toes. He is one of the Townsfolk and has a featured duet in “Shake Your Groove Thing”. Age Range: 35-50 Vocal Range Top: E4 Vocal Range Bottom: G3 POLICE OFFICER CARLISLE Officer Carlisle is the local Chief of Police who is charged with enforcing the new “dance tax”. Although it is painful for him, he reluctantly does so. Age Range: 30-60 Gender: Male or Female KID’S ENSEMBLE CHARACTERS: Overall group of 8 or more with some step out solos and dialog: CHEERLEADERS: Age Range: 10-18 Gender: Female/Male (4-8) Featured on random dialog and vocal solo lines thru-out show TWINS-JENNY & KATIE: (always speak and sing lines together) MATTIE: JESS: (Male or Female) SOPHIA: KYRA: DARBY: CHRISTIAN: (Male or Female) Age Range: 12-17

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TAYLOR SIMPSON Child of Mr. and Mrs. Simpson Age Range: 13-18 Gender: Female TANYA SIMPSON Child of Mr. and Mrs. Simpson Age Range: 13-18 Gender: Female NOAH Male athlete character Age Range: 13-18 Gender: Male BRANDON Brainiac Male character Age Range: 13-18 Gender: Male ASHLEY MANSFORD Child of Mr. and Mrs. Mansford Age Range: 13-18 Gender: Female TAMMY (TOMMY) Newspaper delivery person of Snaphappy Age Range: 13-18 Gender: Male or Female

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TOWNSFOLK ENSEMBLE CHARACTERS: Overall group of 8 or more with some step out solos and dialog. MRS. OGILVIE Opinionated, busybody about everything in Snaphappy. Age Range: 60-75 Gender: Female MR. & MRS SIMPSON Parents to Taylor and Tanya. Age Range: 30-75 Gender: 1 Male and 1 Female SISTER or REVEREND CARESALOT Church leader of Snaphappy Age Range: 30-75 Gender: Male or Female BRANDON’S MOM—SHERRY Typical Mom Age Range: 35-50 Gender: Female GRADUATION DJ Music DJ for Snaphappy Age Range: 19-30 Gender: Female or Male MR. & MRS. LESTER Parents Age Range: 30-75 Gender: 1 Male and 1 Female BLAKE BANKSTON Auto Mechanic for Snaphappy GENERIC ENSEMBLE CHARACTERS: The “Generic” Ensemble can be any other characters that might populate Snaphappy, Ohio. High school kids, parents, teachers, etc. The number can vary depending on how many ensemble performers are available to cast.

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SCENE DESCRIPTIONS PRESHOW **In the PROJECTION PACKAGE for this show, the PreShow backdrop features the Logo Of the Show against a star background.

SCENE 1 SET: TOWN CENTER PARK OF SNAPHAPPY, OHIO—Outdoors, against the backdrop of a Middle American small town street, this scene takes place in and around the Town Center Stage: a Gazebo style platform set piece, possibly rolling. There are also multiple park benches and streetlights scattered down stage giving the stage the look of a small town city center.

SCENE 1-A SET: TOWN CENTER PARK OF SNAPHAPPY, OHIO

SCENE 2 SET: TOWN CENTER PARK OF SNAPHAPPY, OHIO—The sky darkens, indicating dusk.

SCENE 3 SET: TOWN CENTER PARK OF SNAPHAPPY, OHIO. Downstage Scene begins with CHAD and DELANEY sitting on a park bench. As they start to sing, and some of the TOWNSFOLK enter, stars begin to twinkle above the backdrop of the town’s skyline.

SCENE 4 SET: STAGE LEFT—the Interior of the MAYOR’S HOME LIBRARY—In addition to bookcases, there is a chair, a side table and lamp. STAGERIGHT—is an outdoor setting, just outside of the Mayor ’s house.

SCENE 5 SET: TOWN CENTER PARK OF SNAPHAPPY, OHIO. It’s early morning. **In the PROJECTION PACKAGE for this show, the backdrop first shows an over-sized newspaper spinning to reveal the headline “MAYOR ANNOUNCES NEW TAX ON DANCING!” Then it fades into the TOWN CENTER Backdrop.

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SCENE 6 SET: D-D-D DAZZLE DANCE STUDIO- Interior of Don and Daphne’s D-D-D Dazzle Dance Studio located in Downtown Snaphappy. The set features a large, slightly gaudy, sign with the name of the studio on the wall. The walls are also adorned with posters of dancing couples, step patterns, etc. In addition, the set features a long dance bar, a coat rack, and a large potted plant for Mona to hide behind. **In the PROJECTION PACKAGE for this show, there are timed backdrop effects during “Boogie Wonderland”-Dancing Lighting effects

SCENE 7 SET: the Interior of the SNAPHAPPY POLICE STATION—The scene opens to reveal the waiting room/holding area of the Snaphappy Police Station. There’s a large sign labeled “Snaphappy Police Station” on the back wall of the prison, along with the outlines of a couple holding cells. Roll on pieces include a large desk for the OFFICER CARLISLE, a bench or two for the students to be sitting on, and possibly some holding cells.

SCENE 8 SET: STAGE LEFT—the Interior of the MAYOR’S HOME LIBRARY—In addition to bookcases, there is a chair, a side table and lamp. STAGE RIGHT—is an outdoor setting, just outside of the Mayor ’s house.

SCENE 9 SET: THE NEW, CONDENSED, D-D-D DANCE STUDIO—a much smaller and slightly rundown Dance Studio space now, a fraction of the space of the original D-D-D Dance Studio. It is clearly an abandoned space that Don and Daphne have just acquired. There is no signage for the studio, no pictures on the walls, only outlines where the former tenant had pictures at one time. The coat rack, plant and dance bar were moved from the old space. **In the PROJECTION PACKAGE for this show, the backdrop first shows an over-sized newspaper spinning to reveal the headline “MAYOR TRIPLES DANCE TAX!” Then it fades into the CONDENSED DANCE STUDIO Backdrop. Also, there are timed backdrop effects during “Shake Your Groove Thing/Booty”-Dancing Lighting effects

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SCENE 10 SET: TOWN CENTER PARK OF SNAPHAPPY, OHIO—It’s twilight. In the distant Town skyline, we see that the old D-D-D Dance location is boarded up, and a new, smaller storefront has appeared.

SCENE 11 SET: STAGE LEFT—the Interior of the MAYOR’S HOME LIBRARY—In addition to bookcases, there is a chair, a side table and lamp. STAGERIGHT—is a “Flashback” setting, just outside of the Mayor ’s house. It could be an Early 60’s Dance Studio, or a wavy striped backdrop indicating a “dream sequence”. Be creative. **In the PROJECTION PACKAGE for this show, the “Flashback” features a flicking old home movie backdrop that morphs into psychedelic colors.

SCENE 11-A SET: Actors appear either Downstage L or R in front of a curtain, or in the audience near the stage.

SCENE 12 SET: TOWN CENTER PARK OF SNAPHAPPY, OHIO—Outdoors, against the backdrop of a Middle American small town street, this scene takes place in and around the Town Center Stage, with a Gazebo style platform set piece, now decorated with bunting for the Graduation ceremony. There are also multiple benches lined up in two sets of rows Stage L and R, where the Students will sit on one side, and the Townsfolk will sit on the other. **In the PROJECTION PACKAGE for this show, there are timed backdrop effects during “Do You Wanna Dance (Up-tempo)—Fireworks, and during the “Mega Mix Bows”—Dancing Lighting effects

Note: the aforementioned PROJECTION PACKAGE is not available directly through MTI. Should you wish to license this resource, you may do so from Broadway Media Distribution. For information, please visit: www.broadwaymediadistribution.com

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MUSICAL NUMBERS 1.

Overture—Do You Wanna Dance? ................................................................1

Dancin’ in the Streets......................................................................................1

For He’s a Jolly Good Fellow .........................................................................8

Amen #1 ..........................................................................................................8

Amen #2 ..........................................................................................................9

Your Mama Don’t Dance/Why Can’t I Dance? ...........................................10

Dancin’ In The Streets Reprise .....................................................................14

Walkin’ On Sunshine (Underscore) ..............................................................16

Do You Want To Dance?................................................................................17

10. Dancin’ In The Streets (Underscore) ............................................................21 11. Orchestra Hits I .............................................................................................22 12. The Politics of Dancing (Underscore) ..........................................................24 13. Neutron Dance ..............................................................................................26 14. Neutron Dance (Underscore #1) ..................................................................28 15. Boogie Wonderland .......................................................................................29 16. Neutron Dance (Underscore #2) ..................................................................32 17. Dancin’ In The Streets—Protest ...................................................................33 18. The Politics of Dancing (Underscore #1) .....................................................36 19. Your Mama Don’t Dance (Underscore) ........................................................38 20. Neutron Dance (Underscore #3) ..................................................................39 21. Shake Your Groove Thing/Shake Your Booty .............................................40 22. Shake Your Groove Thing (Underscore) ......................................................45 23. Orchestra Hits II............................................................................................46 24. Bust a Move ...................................................................................................48 25. Boogie Wonderland (Underscore) ................................................................55 26. The Flashback Dance (Underscore) ..............................................................56 27. The Politics of Dancing (Underscore #2) .....................................................59 28. Pomp and CircumsDance .............................................................................61 29. Walking on Sunshine ....................................................................................64 30. Dancing Machine ..........................................................................................67 31. Do You Wanna Dance (Up Tempo)...............................................................71 32. MegaMix Bows ..............................................................................................72

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!"#$"%#&'(('#!'()*+#,##)"-$./012#("2/)*3# “Boogie Wonderland” Written by Allee Willis and Jonathan Lind Published by EMI Blackwood Music Inc., EMI April Music Inc., Almo Music Corp., Irving Music Corp. and Big Mystique Music. “Bust A Move” Written by Matt William Dike, Marvin Bruce Young, Luther Rabb and James Walters Published by BMG Firefly on behalf of Ex Vw, Inc., Arlovol Music c/o The Bicycle Music Company, and Microhits Music Corp. “Dancing In The Street” Written by Ivy Hunter, Marvin Gaye, and William Stevenson Published by Jobete Music Co. Inc., MGII Music, NMG Music, FCG Music, and Stone Agate Music (a division of Jobete Music Co. Inc.). “Dancing Machine” Written by Donald E. Fletcher, Hal Davis, and Weldon Dean Parks Published by Jobete Music Co. Inc. & Stone Diamond Music Corp. “Do You Wanna Dance” Written by Bobby Freeman Published by Bobby Freeman Music and Clockus Music "Neutron Dance" Written by Danny Sembello and Allee Willis Published by Universal Music Corp., Songs Of Universal, Inc. on behalf of itself and Streamline Moderne Music “Politics of Dancing” Written by Paul Fishman Published by Jambo Music Ltd. “Shake Your Booty” Written by Harry Casey and Richard Raymond Finch Published by EMI Longitude Music and Harrick Music, Inc. "Shake Your Groove Thing" Written by Frederick J. Perren and Dino Fekaris Published by Universal PolyGram International Publishing, Inc. on behalf of itself and Perren-Vibes Music, Inc. “Walking On Sunshine” Written by Kimberly Rew Published by BMG Platinum Songs “Why Can’t I Dance” Written by Mark Brymer and John Jacobson Published by Brymark Publishing Co. "Your Mama Don't Dance" Written by Kenneth Clark Loggins and James M. Messina Published by Universal Music Corp. and Almo Music Corp. on behalf of Jasperilla Music Co.

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#1—Overture—Do You Wanna Dance?

(Track 1)

SET—TOWN CENTER PARK OF SNAPHAPPY, OHIO—Against the backdrop of a Middle American small town street, this scene takes place in and around the Town Center Stage: a Gazebo style platform set piece, possibly rolling. There are also multiple park benches and streetlights scattered down stage giving the stage the look of a small town city center. The curtain rises on DELANEY DUZWELL, the happiest of all Snaphappy High School kids, as she dances her way to the celebration. Soon the TOWNSFOLK CHORUS and KIDS CHORUS filter on stage for the ‘May Day Celebration’ in the Town Square of Snaphappy, Ohio.

#2—Dancin’ in the Streets

(Track 2)

DELANEY enters down stage doing a fun dance step. MRS. OGILVIE enters

DELANEY (almost running into MRS. OGILVIE) Oh, hello Mrs. Ogilvie, great day for a May Day celebration, isn’t it?

MRS. OGILVIE You are so right, Delaney!

MR.& MRS. MANSFORD enter the stage doing a Mambo couples combination.

MR. & MRS. MANSFORD Hello!

DELANEY Well hello, Mr. & Mrs. Mansford. Those new steps are THE BOMB! Did you learn those at the D-D-D Dance Studio?

MR. & MRS. MANSFORD We sure did!

2 or 3 FEMALE STUDENTS enter the stage doing some playful ballet moves.

DELANEY Wow, that was impressive girls!

(looking around the stage) Hey look, everyone is starting to show up for the May Day Celebration!

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CHORUS WHEH!

(different spoken pitches) YEH. YEH. YEH. YEH. HEY!

DELANEY (Sung) CALLING OUT AROUND THE WORLD

CHORUS YEH!

DELANEY ARE YOU READY FOR A BRAND NEW BEAT?

CHORUS (spoken) Give us the beat!

DELANEY (speaking directly to the audience) Welcome to Snap

(2 snaps) happy, Ohio everybody, the snap-happiest place in… well… in all of Ohio!

CHORUS (Sung) SUMMER’S HERE

DELANEY & CHORUS AND THE TIME IS RIGHT

DELANEY FOR DANCING IN THE STREET

CHORUS OH, YEH!

DELANEY (Spoken) My name is Delaney Duzwell!

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EMMA And I’m her best friend EMMA! Wanna see me do a jump?

EMMA does a cheerleader jump

CHORUS YAY!

DELANEY Nice! You’re awesome EMMA!

EMMA No you’re awesome!

DELANEY No, you’re awesome!

EMMA Let’s face it…

EMMA & DELANEY We’re both awesome!

CHORUS (Sung) THEY’RE DANCIN’ IN CHICAGO,

DELANEY THEY’RE DANCIN’ IN CHICAGO,

CHORUS DOWN IN NEW ORLEANS,

DELANEY DOWN IN NEW ORLEANS,

CHORUS UP IN NEW YORK CITY.

DELANEY UP IN NEW YORK CITY.

(Spoken) Okay so Snap

(2 snaps) happy, Ohio isn’t awesome like New York, New Orleans or Chicago…!

EMMA You can say that again!

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DELANEY But that doesn’t mean we can’t have a blast. See that couple over there? That’s my Mom and Dad, DON and DAPHNE DUZWELL, owners and operators of the D-D-D Dazzle Dance Studios. Everyone of the kids here in Snaphappy has taken dance lessons from them, because…

EMMA In Snap

(2 snaps) happy, Ohio dance is what we do.

(Sung) ALL WE NEED IS THE MUSIC, SWEET MUSIC. THERE’LL BE MUSIC EVERYWHERE.

CHORUS THERE’LL BE SWINGIN’ AND SWAYIN’

DELANEY & CHORUS AND RECORDS PLAYIN’ AND DANCIN’,

CHORUS DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS!

DELANEY DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS!

CHORUS COME ON AND DANCE IN THE STREETS NOW!

DELANEY WE’LL BE DANCIN’

CHORUS DANCIN’! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS.

DELANEY DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS!

CHORUS COME ON DANCE IN THE STREETS, NOW.

Seeing CHAD and his friend Lucas chatting on the other side of the stage

DELANEY (Spoken) See those guys over there? That’s Chad and his friend Lucas. Chad is the dreamiest guy in Snaphappy. We’ve been friends since first grade.

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CHORUS (Sung) IT’S AN INVITATION ACROSS THE NATION, A CHANCE FOR THE FOLKS TO MEET.

CHAD and LUCAS are talking to each other on the far side of the stage and passing a football back and forth between them.

CHAD (Spoken) Hey LUCAS, what’s up dawg? I heard you made starting wide receiver this fall!

LUCAS (bragging) You heard right, CHAD. ‘Cause I got all the right moves!

EMMA And LUCAS is my boyfriend!

DELANEY (surprised) He is?

LUCAS I am?

EMMA Sure!

(to audience) He doesn’t know it yet… but he will. Watch this…

EMMA cartwheels or does some other gymnastic moves and lands right in front of LUCAS.

CHORUS YAY!

LUCAS Hi Emma!

EMMA Hey LUCAS! Wanna dance!

LUCAS (reluctantly) Um, sure EMMA! Why not? That’s what everybody’s doing!

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Lucas seems to know how to let Emma do all the work. As SHE smiles and winks to the audience, HE basically just stands there and lets her rock out.

EMMA See what I mean?

CHORUS (Sung) IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOU WEAR, JUST AS LONG AS YOU ARE THERE. COME ON EVERY GUY, GRAB A GIRL. EV’RYWHERE AROUND THE WORLD, YEH!

DELANEY & CHORUS (DELANEY adlibs over chorus) DANCIN’! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! COME ON DANCE IN THE STREETS, NOW. DANCIN’! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! COME ON DANCE IN THE STREETS, NOW.

CHORUS CALLIN’ OUT AROUND THE WORLD ARE YOU READY FOR A BRAND NEW BEAT? SUMMER’S HERE AND THE TIME IS RIGHT FOR DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! OH, YEH! DANCIN’! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! COME ON DANCE (HEY) IN THE STREETS, NOW! DANCIN’! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! COME ON DANCE IN THE STREETS, NOW. DANCIN’,! DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS. YEH! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS. COME ON! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS!

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Scene 1A

Also, as the song is finishing, MAYOR PETE LIGHTFOOT, MONA LIGHTFOOT AND CHAD LIGHTFOOT appear and work their way toward the Town Center Stage.

DELANEY (to the audience) That’s just the way it is in Snaphappy, Ohio!

DON DUZWELL (Stepping on the Gazebo stage with Daphne) That was just wonderful, DELANEY, kids, Mr. Weasle.

MR. WIZZLE It’s Wizzle!

DON DUZWELL Mrs. Ogilvie, Sergeant, everybody! Just wonderful!

(doing an air applause motion)

DAPHNE DUZWELL It’s obvious all of our dance lessons have really paid off!

DON DUZWELL Next, I want to give a warm welcome to our “first family” of Snaphappy, Mayor Pete Lightfoot!

DAPHNE DUZWELL (teasingly) Just home from his honeymoon in Cleveland!

CROWD (impressed) Cleveland!... Ooooooooh!

MRS. OGILVIE (to the Sergeant) The mayor looks so happy again with the new Mrs. Lightfoot!

DON DUZWELL Come on up here Mr. Mayor and introduce us to your new wife! Let’s hear if for them everybody!

(again, doing an air applause motion)

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#3—For He’s a Jolly Good Fellow

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(Track 3) ALL

FOR HE’S A JOLLY GOOD FELLOW! FOR HE’S A JOLLY GOOD FELLOW! FOR HE’S A JOLLY GOOD FELLOW! IN SNAPHAPPY O, SNAPHAPPY O, IN SNAPHAPPY O-HI-O!

EVERYONE applauds The MAYOR steps up to the podium to give a talk

MAYOR (Laughing and accepting the admiration of the townspeople.) Oh ho ho! Thank you so much, my fellow citizens of Snap

(2 snaps) happy, in this great state of Ohio! I have missed you all so very much!

MR. MANSFORD (Shouting from the crowd) We’ve missed you too, Mr. Mayor.

MRS. SIMPSON That’s right Mr. Mayor. Snaphappy is not the same when you’re not here to boss us around!

EVERYONE laughs.

MAYOR Oh Ho Ho! You are so kind. Well, as you know, this is the first time I have left Snaphappy since my beloved wife left this good earth five long years ago.

REVEREND CARESALOT She was a good woman, Mr. Mayor. May she rest in peace.

ALL bow their heads and take off their hats for a two second moment of silence.

#4—Amen #1

(Track 4) ALL

(Sung) AMEN!

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MAYOR Before my good wife left my son CHAD and I she said, “Mr. Mayor”, she always called me Mr. Mayor, heh heh, “when I am gone I want you to go out and find yourself a good woman to be a wife to you and a mother to our son.” Although, it has taken me a long time to get over the loss of my beloved wife…

REVEREND CARESALOT May she rest in peace.

ALL take off their hats and bow their heads again.

#5—Amen #2

(Track 5) ALL

(Sung) AMEN!

MAYOR At last, I have found the new love of my life, to be my wife and a mother to my son, CHAD. Ladies and Gentlemen, I am proud to introduce you to the new first lady of Snaphappy, the new Mrs. MONA LIGHTFOOT!

ALL cheer! MONA steps up to the podium to say a couple of words

DELANEY She look really nice, Chad.

CHAD I’ve barely met her, Delaney. I hope so.

MONA My dear new friends. My new husband has told me so much about each and every one of you I feel as though I know you already. I just know we are all going to be very good friends…

She is interrupted.

DELANEY Mr. Mayor! Mr. Mayor!

MAYOR What is it, DELANEY?

DELANEY In honor of your new wife and your homecoming, the school kids and I have put together a special musical number!

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MAYOR (Jumping up to the podium) Oh how wonderful! You kids always brighten my day! Mrs. Lightfoot and I are thrilled.

As HE looks at MONA, the apparent happiness changes. MONA look panicked, then SHE shoots him a glare of distain.

#6—Your Mama Don’t Dance/Why Can’t I Dance

(Track 6)

(continuing) This is a GREAT way to welcome Mrs. Lightfoot and close out our little Snaphappy May Day Celebration!

Led by DELANEY DUZWELL. CHAD jumps in half way through and becomes the center of the number.

DELANEY YOUR MAMA DON’T DANCE AND YOUR DADDY DON’T ROCK ‘N’ ROLL.

KIDS CHORUS (chatter, etc.)

DELANEY YOUR MAMA DON’T DANCE AND YOUR DADDY DON’T ROCK ‘N’ ROLL.

KIDS CHORUS (chatter, etc.)

DELANEY WHEN EVENIN’ ROLLS AROUND AND IT’S TIME TO GO TO TOWN WHERE DO YOU GO…

KIDS CHORUS (chatter, etc.)

DELANEY TO ROCK AND ROLL?

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CHAD (joining Delaney) THE OLD FOLKS SAY THAT YA GOTTA END YOUR DAY BY TEN IF YOU’RE OUT ON A DATE AND YOU BRING IT HOME LATE IT’S A SIN THERE JUST AIN’T NO EXCUSIN’ YOU KNOW YOU’RE GONNA LOSE AND NEVER WIN I’LL SAY IT AGAIN

CHAD and DELANEY start doing a simple couples’ dance while KIDS CHORUS sings background vocals

KID’S CHORUS (Singing) BOP BOP, BAH BOP, DANCE

MONA and the MAYOR step down stage and begin speaking while the chorus is singing.

MAYOR (Speaking) That’s my boy!

MONA (Shocked) You’re letting your own son dance?

MAYOR Letting him? Of course! I think it’s great!

MONA But shouldn’t… I mean…

KID’S CHORUS YOUR MAMA DON’T DANCE BOP, BOP, BAH BOP, DANCE.

MAYOR His mother was a great dancer. And I’ve got some pretty good moves myself if you don’t mind me saying so.

KID’S CHORUS YOUR MAMA DON’T DANCE BOP, BOP, BAH BOP, DANCE.

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MONA Well I do mind… I… I…

MAYOR Watch this! Come on, kids!

The MAYOR joins the dance much to the dismay of MONA

ALL KIDS AND IT’S ALL BECAUSE YOUR MAMA DON’T DANCE AND YOUR DADDY DON’T ROCK ‘N’ ROLL YOUR MAMA DON’T DANCE AND YOUR DADDY DON’T ROCK ‘N’ ROLL WHEN EVENING ROLLS AROUND AND IT’S TIME TO GO TO TOWN WHERE DO YOU GO… TO ROCK ‘N’ ROLL?

MR. WIZZLE YOU PULL INTO A DRIVE-IN AND FIND A PLACE TO PARK

MONA (speaking to the Mayor) Is that the Principal of the high school making a fool of himself?

MAYOR It sure is! That’s Mr. Weasle.

MR. WIZZLE Wizzle!

MAYOR You see, my Dear! In Snap

(2 snaps) happy everybody dances!

DELANEY You’re next Mrs. Lightfoot!

Near the end of the dance MONA appears to get more and more nervous and agitated. Some of the kids start to pull her into the dance routine. This is the last straw, she has had enough so she stops the music by pulling the plug to all the power supplied to the musicians. The dancers stumble and the dance falls apart. SFX—Electrical Sizzle

MONA Whoops…!

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EVERYONE ON STAGE FREEZES as MONA sings. Direct Segue into—Why Can’t I Dance begins MONA LIGHTFOOT emerges from the crowd and makes her way down stage to speak and sing her solo.

(MONA) (spoken) I haven’t been here a day yet and this place is already giving me the creeps. What have I done? Did I make a big mistake?

(exasperated) A town full of dancers. What was I thinking?!?!?

(Singing) WAS I CRAZY TO THINK THAT ONCE I GOT THIS WEDDING RING I COULD DO THE “MOTHER THING”. BUT NO ONE TOLD ME, IN ADVANCE WHEN I SAID “I DO”, I’D HAVE TO DANCE. WHY, OH WHY, OH WHY HARD AS I MIGHT TRY WHY CAN’T I DANCE? I’LL NEVER DANCE. WHY OH WHY, OH WHY HOW CAN I SURVIVE? IN THIS TOWN, I DON’T STAND A CHANCE, ‘CAUSE I CAN’T DANCE.

(Spoken) What’s the matter with these people? Don’t they know disco is dead? It’s 1995 for heaven’s sake… nobody dances anymore do they? But this town, THEY didn’t get the memo. No! I feel like I’ve stepped back twenty years! How am I going to survive this!...

(singing) WHY, OH WHY, OH WHY HARD AS I MIGHT TRY, WHY CAN’T I DANCE? I’LL NEVER DANCE. WHY, OH WHY, OH WHY? HOW CAN I SURVIVE? IN THIS TOWN, I DON’T STAND A CHANCE, ‘CAUSE I CAN’T DANCE. I’LL NEVER DANCE!

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(MONA) (spoken in disgust) This is ridiculous.

As the Song Ends, EVERYONE come “back to life” on stage.

DON (slightly chuckling) Well, that’s one way to end a number. But I got a better way to do it!

#7—Dancin’ In The Streets Reprise CHORUS CALLIN’ OUT AROUND THE WORLD ARE YOU READY FOR A BRAND NEW BEAT? SUMMER’S HERE, AND THE TIME IS RIGHT FOR DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! OH, YEH! DANCIN’! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! COME ON DANCE (HEY) IN THE STREETS, NOW. DANCIN’! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! COME ON DANCE IN THE STREETS, NOW. DANCIN’! DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS, YEH! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS! COME ON! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS!

(Track 7)

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Scene 2

As the CROWD begins to disperse, the MAYOR steps up and speaks to everyone.

MAYOR Yes, well, why don’t we all call it a night and head on home. It’s been a long week for all of us. Thank you! Thank you and thank you again, everyone!

MONA (Interrupting, with disgust) That dancing! It’s… disgusting.

(speaking quite loudly) We’ll have none of that around here.

ALL (Everyone is shocked) Adlibs, gasps…

EVERYONE is drawn toward MONA and the MAYOR

MR. WIZZLE No dancing? What is she talking about?

MAYOR No dancing? Don’t be silly. Everyone dances in Snaphappy! It’s what makes us… well… Snap

(All do 2 snaps) happy!

MONA (faking happiness to the crowd) Well, not any more. I hate dancing, and I’m not going to stand for it.

KATIE She hates dancing? That’s like hating puppies!

(exits crying)

MAYOR Yes dear. Of course, Dear. You’ve had a very long day. You’ll feel better after a bit of rest.

(to the crowd) Thank you so much everybody for your warm and friendly greeting. Now perhaps it is time for everyone to go on home. Goodbye! So long! Thank you all so very much!

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The CROWD begins to disperse again, leaving CHAD and DELANEY center stage.

#8 – Walkin’ On Sunshine (Underscore)

(Track 8)

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Scene 3

SET—Still in the TOWN CENTER, but it’s the end of the day at twilight. AS CHAD and DELANEY start to sing, stars begin to twinkle above the town’s skyline. CHAD and DELANEY both walk downstage R to sit on a park bench.

DELANEY (sweetly) So Chad, that’s your new mother, huh? Congratulations. She seems real… uh… interesting.

CHAD She’s not my mother

DELANEY That’s not what I just heard.

CHAD My dad met her in Seattle. I don’t know what he was thinking. I guess he was just lonely after my Mom… well you know…

DELANEY Well, she can’t be all bad if your dad likes her enough to marry her. I bet she can cook a meat loaf like nobody’s business! And bake a cherry pie better than Mrs. Ogilvie’s Snaphappy Award winner… Or…

CHAD Maybe. I guess. But she’s making my life miserable. She even told my Dad I needed a 9:00 curfew!

DELANEY A Curfew? Oh how seventies! And what’s she got against dancing?

CHAD Who knows? But, whenever she sees someone dancing she goes ballistic!

#9—Do You Want To Dance?

(Track 9) DELANEY

Well, dancing is the only thing I’ve ever wanted to do.

CHAD (smilingly with just a little flirt) The only thing?

— 17 —

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DELANEY (smiling coyly) Well…

CHAD Yeah, I’ve noticed.

DELANEY Oh, come on, Chad. Let’s dance. It’ll make you feel better.

CHAD Sorry Delaney, I don’t feel much like dancing right now.

DELANEY (singing) DO YOU WANT TO DANCE AND HOLD MY HAND, TELL ME YOU’RE MY MAN? OH, BABY DO YOU WANT TO DANCE?

CHAD DANCE

(Spoken) Really?

(Singing) DANCE

DELANEY WE COULD DANCE UNDER THE MOONLIGHT, HUG AND KISS ALL THROUGH THE NIGHT. OH BABY

CHAD BABY

DELANEY TELL ME, DO YOU WANT TO DANCE WITH ME BABY?

CHAD DANCE

(Spoken) I don’t know…

(Singing) DANCE…

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DELANEY DO YA, DO YA

CHAD DO YA DO YA

CHAD & DELANEY DO YA WANT TO DANCE?

DELANEY DO YA DO YA…

CHAD DO YA DO YA…

CHAD & DELANEY DO YA WANT TO DANCE?

DELANEY DO YA, DO YA,

CHAD DO YA DO YA…

DELANEY DO YA WANT TO DANCE WITH ME, BABY…

CHAD (Spoken) It would be just you and me, right?

DELANEY Ah, that’s right. Ah…

Suddenly multiple COUPLES come on stage to join in by singing and dancing.

CHAD, DELANEY & ALL OH, AH, AH, DO YOU WANT TO DANCE

ALL DO YA! OH…

CHAD & DELANEY UNDER THE MOONLIGHT?

ALL DANCE…

— 19 —

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CHAD & DELANEY HUG ME, KISS ME

ALL DO YA? OH…

CHAD & DELANEY ALL THROUGH THE NIGHT.

ALL OH, BABE, BABY

CHAD & DELANEY OH BABY. TELL ME DO YA WANT TO DANCE?

ALL DANCE

CHAD & DELANEY WHO… HOH… DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA,

ALL DO YA, WANT TO… DO YA WANT TO DANCE?

CHAD & DELANEY DANCE WITH ME BABY?

ALL DO YA WANT TO DANCE?

CHAD & DELANEY DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA

ALL DANCE WITH ME BABY?

CHAD & DELANEY DO YA WANT TO DANCE WITH ME BABY?

ALL DO YA WANT TO DANCE?

CHAD & DELANEY DANCE WITH ME BABY?

ALL DO YA WANT TO DANCE?

CHAD & DELANEY DANCE WITH ME BABY? OH… DANCE WITH ME BABY?

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ALL DO YA WANT TO DANCE?

(Song ends) Chad looks around the stage a little shocked by all the folks who have joined him and DELANEY during their moment together.

DELANEY Come on, CHAD. There has to be a way to change her mind.

CHAD I dunno…

DELANEY We’ll figure something out… together.

THEY walk off had in hand as the CROWD disperses.

#10—Dancin’ In The Streets (Underscore)

(Track 10)

SET—The backdrop SR changes to a few trees and greenery indicating a neighborhood street in Snaphappy. EMMA enters the other way and flipping/cartwheeling etc. across the stage.

EMMA Hey Lucas! Watch this?

LUCAS (Chasing after her and speaking to the audience) That girl is unbelievable.

THEY exit.

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Scene 4 – T he Mayor’s House

SET—The library of the Mayor’s home is SL. In addition to bookcases, there is a chair, a side table and lamp. SR turns dark, as if outside of the house.

MAYOR (still a little angry) Sweetheart! I just don’t know what you’ve got against dancing. And, that scene you pulled at the May Day celebration was, at the very least, awkward.

MONA (hiding her embarrassment) I just…

CHAD enters Oh, Chad’s home. I’ll go start dinner.

MONA exits As Mona exits, SHE stumbles, and then rushes out.

CHAD I’m not really hungry anymore.

MAYOR I wish you’d give her a chance, son. At least try. I’m sure she was just nervous in front of everyone. She really isn’t all that bad.

CHAD Dad! She doesn’t even like dancing! That whole scene in town was so embarrassing. What’s that all about?

MAYOR Well, I’m not sure I quite understand either. But, I’m certain she’ll come around once she sees how important dance is to all of the citizens of Snaphappy.

MONA re-enters with forks and knives ready to set the table.

MONA I just had a crazily delicious idea. Why didn’t I think of it before?

MAYOR What is it, Dear?

MONA Starting immediately I want YOU to impose a tax on all forms of dancing.

#11—Orchestra Hits I

(Track 11)

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— 23 —

MAYOR & CHAD (Together) What?

MONA Yes, a city tax on any dancing… I want you to tax all this dancing.

MONA seems proud of her revelation to solve her secret, whatever it may be, and help the city at the same time. She speaks directly to the audience. Anybody caught dancing within the borders of Snaphappy will have to pay a fee.

CHAD He can’t do that!

MAYOR I can’t do that!

MONA Of course you can! You are the mayor. I am your wife. It makes total sense. So you’ll do it.

CHAD A dance tax? That’s just weird. This is going to cause turmoil like you can’t imagine!

MONA Call it what you will young man. But a tax on dance will certainly take the pressure off all the people who don’t want to dance.

CHAD Who doesn’t want to dance???

MONA Besides, if someone does break the rules then we’ll raise needed money for the town.

MAYOR Well, the city coffers are a little short these days. But a dance tax?

MONA It’s a brilliant idea and you should announce it immediately.

MAYOR But…

MONA Immediately!

MONA exits briskly as CHAD and The MAYOR stand dumbfounded.

— 24 —

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Scene 5

#12—The Politics of Dancing Underscore

(Track 12)

SET—Back at the TOWN CENTER. It’s early morning. **In the PROJECTION PACKAGE for this show, the backdrop first shows an oversized newspaper spinning to reveal the headline “MAYOR ANNOUNCES NEW TAX ON DANCING!” Then it fades into the Town Center Backdrop. Various TOWNFOLK and KID CHORUS enter from all areas of the stage, individually or in small groups. They are holding copies of the Snaphappy Herald newspaper and City Fliers that announce the new Dance Tax. They are all very upset and singing their thoughts. TOMMY, stepping downstage, carrying a Newspaper like a “Newsie”

TOMMY Extra! Extra! Mayor Lightfoot Announces New Tax On Dancing!

EVERYONE on stage looks at Tommy and exclaims:

ALL What?

MAYOR (Stepping down stage from the wings) (Reading) Under executive order Mayor Pete Lightfoot announces that anyone caught teaching or performing dance within the city limits of Snaphappy, Ohio will face a tax payment of $50 the first dance, $100 the second, and $250 for the third. Anyone failing to pay the tax will face jail time!

2 KIDS He can’t do that!

3 TOWNFOLK He just did!

Music Ends

TOMMY This is a catastrophe! You can’t put a tax on dancing.

ALL They just did!

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SHERRY I cannot believe that anyone caught dancing who does not pay the tax is going to be thrown in jail!

TOMMY Jail? I’m too young to go to jail!

ASHLEY Orange is not my color!

SET—Still in the Town Center, but the backdrop darkens slightly to bring the focus more downstage. All the Townsfolk CHORUS exits stage. The KIDS CHORUS gathers downstage around DELANEY.

DELANEY Come on you guys! We can’t put up with this. I’ve been dancing my whole life. We all have! We can’t stop now.

BRANDON Delaney’s right. We have a right to dance. And whether the Mayor’s wife like it or not, she can’t stop us. We’re dancing!

NOAH Nice mom, CHAD!

CHAD She’s NOT my mom!

LUCAS (clueless) I didn’t know Chad had a new Mom. Cool!

EMMA Lucas! Get with the program!

DELANEY Come on guys. It’s not Chad’s fault!

NOAH No one has the right to tell us we can’t dance!

TOMMY It’s unconstitutional!

SHERRY It is?

— 26 —

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TOMMY Sure. You know “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness!”

TANYA Dancing is the only way I know how to pursue happiness.

NOAH It wouldn’t be Snaphappy without dancing!

DELANEY What’s going to happen to my parents dance studio if no one can afford to dance?

JESS You’ll probably have to move to Akron or something!

ALL (horrified) No! Not Akron!

DELANEY We can’t put up with this. We’ve got to fight for our rights!

#13—Neutron Dance

(Track 13) TOMMY

(Spoken) You’re right! Give me dancing or give me… uh… dancing!

DELANEY I can’t move to Akron! I just can’t!

KID’S CHORUS No! Dance Tax! No! Dance Tax! No! No Dance Tax!

LUCAS Feet don’t fail me now!

(Singing) I DON’T WANT TO TAKE IT ANYMORE

EMMA & LUCAS I’LL JUST STAY HERE LOCKED BEHIND THE DOOR

EMMA JUST NO TIME TO STOP AND GET AWAY

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ALL ‘CAUSE I WORK SO HARD TO MAKE IT EV’RY DAY WHOO HOO! NO! NO! WHO HOO! NO TAX!

EMMA THERE’S NO MONEY FALLING FROM THE SKY

LUCAS ‘CAUSE A MAN TOOK MY HEART AND ROBBED ME BLIND.

ALL ROOF CAVED IN ON ALL THE SIMPLE DREAMS AND TO GET AHEAD YOUR HEART STARTS PUMPIN’ SCHEMES. WHOO OOHH! NO! NO! WHOO OOOH NO TAX! AND IT’S HARD TO SAY JUST HOW SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE. AND IT’S HARD TO FIND ANY STRENGTH TO DRAW THE LINE. OH! I’M JUST BURNING DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE. I’M JUST BURNING DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE I KNOW THERE’S A POT OF GOLD FOR ME. ALL I GOT TO DO IS JUST BELIEVE. OH, OH, I’M JUST BURNING DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE. I’M JUST BURNING DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE.

LUCAS (spoken) Come on!

Dance Section

ALL (rapping) FEET DON’T. FEET DON’T. FEET DON’T. FEET DON’T. FEET DON’T FAIL ME NOW. FEET DON’T FAIL ME NOW.

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(ALL) FEET DON’T FAIL ME NOW. FEET DON’T FAIL ME NOW. FEET DON’T, FEET DON’T FAIL ME NOW. TH’LL BE NO DANCE TAX! FEET DON’T, FEET DON’T FAIL ME NOW. TH’LL BE NO DANCE TAX!

(Sung) TH’LL BE NO DANCE TAX! AND IT’S HARD TO SAY JUST HOW SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE. AND IT’S HARD TO FIND ANY STRENGTH TO DRAW THE LINE OH, I’M JUST BURNING, DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE. I’M JUST BURNING DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE. I’M SO HAPPY DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE. I’M JUST BURNIN’ DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE.

(Sirens start) YES, WE’RE DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE BUT, NO DANCE TAX! YES, WE’RE DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE FEET DON’T FAIL ME NOW! YES, WE’RE DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE (POLICE OFFICER CARLISLE ENTERS AND BEGINS PULLING KIDS OFF STAGE “UNDER ARREST”.) BUT, NO DANCE TAX! YES, WE’RE DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE FEET DON’T FAIL ME NOW!

As the song ends, we hear police sirens and see flashing lights as all of the kids are being “arrested” and escorted to the Police Station.

#14—Neutron Dance (Underscore)

(Track 14)

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Scene 6 – At T he D-D-D Dazzle Dance Studio

SET—The lights come up on the interior of Don and Daphne’s D-D-D Dazzle Dance Studio located in downtown Snaphappy. The set features a large, slightly gaudy sign with the name of the studio on the wall. The walls are also adorned with posters of dancing couples, step patterns, etc. In addition, the set features a long dance bar, a coat rack, and a large potted plant for Mona to hide behind.

DON (on the Dance Studio very long-corded telephone) Yes, yes, I just got the word. Effective immediately, we are being taxed $50 a square foot to run the D-D-D Dance Studio dance classes. This is going to kill us, but what are we gonna do… Akron? No, I don’t think that will fly… No, I haven’t told Daphne yet.

#15—Boogie Wonderland

(Track 15) DAPHNE

(Speaking) And, the final steps are…

(Demonstrating) 1, and 2, 3 and 4, 5, 6, 7 and 8. Okay. Let’s all try that. Here we go!

TOWNSFOLK CHORUS (Speaking as they repeat the steps) 1 and 2, 3 and 4, 5, 6, 7 and 8

DAPHNE I think we have it,… let’s run it from the top. Don… oh great, you’re still on the phone… I’ll take the solo. Here we go!

The lighting suddenly changes to emulate a Disco Dance floor in the 1970’s.

ALL (Singing) DANCE!

DON (Still on the phone—speaking) The kids are WHERE?!?!? IS THAT EVEN LEGAL? They’re just kids!

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ALL (Singing) AH, HAH DANCE!

DON (Speaking—still on the phone) Yes, I will let all the parents know who are in the class now… Oh, my goodness. First the dance tax and now THIS!!

Still on the very long corded telephone, DON tries to make his way through all the dancing couples to get to where DAPHNE is standing. Various FOLKS try to get him dancing during this process.

DAPHNE (Singing) MIDNIGHT CREEPS SO SLOWLY INTO HEARTS OF MEN WHO NEED MORE THAN THEY GET DAYLIGHT DEALS A BAD HAND, TO A WOMAN WHO HAS LAID TOO MANY BETS.

TOWNSFOLK CHORUS OOOH… OOOH HOO… OOOH

Suddenly, we spy MONA sneaking into the Dance Studio and hiding behind a tall plant in the corner. She stares at the goings on looking concerned, frustrated, and irritated.

DAPHNE THE MIRROR STARES YOU IN THE FACE AND SAYS “BABY, UH IT DON’T WORK” YOU SAY YOUR PRAYERS THOUGH YOU DON’T CARE YOU DANCE AND SHAKE THE HURT.

ALL (Singing) DANCE. HOO HOO HOO DANCE! BOOGIE WONDERLAND AH, HAH, DANCE. HOO HOO HOO DANCE! BOOGIE WONDERLAND YEAH-EE, YEAH-EE YEAH.

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DON (Speaking) DAPHNE, we have to talk.

DAPHNE I’m a little busy right now, Don.

DON But DAPHNE… This is important!

ALL ALL THE LOVE!

DON (Speaking) DAPHNE, this is really serious!

DAPHNE So is dancing, Don. Remember this is a dance studio. These people are our clients.

ALL (Singing) ALL THE RECORDS ARE PLAYING AND MY HEART KEEPS SAYING “BOOGIE WONDERLAND!”

DON (Speaking) But the mayor and his new tax…

DAPHNE Later Don. After the class is over.

MR. WIZZLE Come on, Don. Don’t be a downer!

ALL (Singing) DANCE! HOO HOO HOO DANCE! BOOGIE WONDERLAND AH, HAH, DANCE! HOO HOO HOO DANCE BOOGIE WONDERLAND! YEAH-EE, YEAH-EE, YEAH.

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DON (Shouting) But stop everyone! Listen to me! Delaney and the rest of the kids are in jail!

The lights change back to normal.

TOWNSFOLK CHORUS What… No…! I don’t believe it!

Song abruptly stops

DON They were all dancing and the mayor ordered them rounded up and thrown in jail.

MRS. MANSFORD My baby in the slammer?! Oh no!

(SHE faints)

MRS. SIMPSON All the kids? Are you serious? They are ALL in jail?

MR. SIMPSON For dancing?

DON That’s what I’ve been told.

MR. MANSFORD Well, this is ridiculous!

MRS. SIMPSON It’s that new wife of the mayor’s. It’s all her fault!

Hearing that, MONA quickly stumbles off, making sure she isn’t seen.

DON Well, I don’t know whose fault it is, but the fact is our kids are behind bars.

MRS. MANSFORD My baby in the slammer?! Oh no!

(SHE faints again)

DAPHNE Class is over… We’ve got to ALL get down to the police station to get our kids!

Curtain closes as PARENTS exit stage.

#16—Neutron Dance Underscore #2

(Track 16)

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— 33 —

Scene 7 – In T he Police Station

SET—The scene opens to reveal the waiting room/holding area of the Snaphappy Police Station. There’s a large sign labeled “Snaphappy Police Station” on the back wall of the prison, along with the outlines of a couple of holding cells. Roll on pieces include a large desk for OFFICER CARLISLE, a bench or two for the students to be sitting on, and possibly some holding cells. POLICE OFFICE CARLISLE and all the kids are bunched in the Police Station holding cell/waiting area. The KIDS are all chanting rhythmically in protest. Their PARENTS are just outside the front door, waiting on them.

CHAD & DELANEY No! No!

KIDS Dance tax!

ALL No dance tax!

CHAD & DELANEY No! No!

KIDS Dance tax!

ALL No dance tax!

#17—Dancin’ In The Streets – Protest

(Track17)

POLICE OFFICER CARLISLE (Stepping up to the counter to address all the kids) Okay kids. That’s enough now. Your parents have paid the fine and are here to pick you all up. Just remember. No more dancing in Snaphappy! Unless you pay the tax!

KID Officer Carlisle, you can’t be serious! Snaphappy has always been all about dance.

ALL THE KIDS (ad-libs and talking at once) Yeah officer! What are we gonna do if we can’t dance? We always dance? This is so unfair! Etc.

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DELANEY (Singing) CALLING OUT AROUND THE WORLD.

KIDS Yeh!

DELANEY ARE YOU READY FOR A BRAND NEW BEAT?

KIDS Give us the beat!

(Singing) SUMMER’S HERE…

DELANEY & KIDS AND THE TIME IS RIGHT

DELANEY FOR DANCIN’ IN THE STREET.

KIDS OH, YEAH!

POLICE OFFICER CARLISLE (Speaking) Hey! I’m just the messenger and I’m paid to keep the peace. If you’ve got an issue take it up with Mayor Lightfoot. Or better yet, Moanin’ Mona, I mean the mayor’s wife! Wow! She’s a tough cookie!

KIDS (Speaking) You got that right!

(Singing) CALLING OUT AROUND THE WORLD ARE YOU READY FOR A BRAND NEW BEAT?

(As KIDS continue to sing, their PARENTS show up and pull them out of the group and head off stage.)

PARENT #1 (Grabbing their child from the group) (Speaking) ASHLEY! You are not calling anybody, and as far as that “New Beat” is concerned,

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(PARENT #1) the only beat I want to hear is the beat, beat, beat of your feet to your room, young lady!

KIDS (Singing) SUMMER’S HERE, AND THE TIME IS RIGHT FOR DANCIN’ IN THE STREET, OH, YEH!

PARENT #2 (Grabbing their child from the group.) (Speaking) Brandon!

BRANDON Why, Dad? Why!

PARENT #2 Because I said so! That’s why!

BRANDON Really, Dad, that’s the best reason you have?

PARENT #2 Not only the best… it’s the only reason! Come on!

KIDS (Singing) ALL WE NEED IS MUSIC, SWEET MUSIC THERE’LL BE MUSIC EV’RYHWERE. THERE’LL BE SWINGIN’ AND SWAYIN’ AND RECORDS PLAYIN’ DANCIN’! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS!

NOAH (Speaking) But Mom!

PARENT #3 Don’t you “But Mom” me!

KIDS (Singing) DANCIN’! DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS!

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PARENT #4 (Speaking) Jenny, where are your manners? Were you born in a barn?

KIDS (Singing) DANCIN’! DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’

All remaining PARENTS grab their kids and leave the police station.

A FEW KIDS (Singing) DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS. YEH!

PARENT #5 (Speaking) Why can’t you be more like your brother?

FEWER KIDS (Singing) DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS. COME ON!

LAST KID (singing) DANCIN’ IN THE…

PARENT #6 (speaking) Taylor!!!

LAST KID (speaking weakly) Where’d everybody go?

Song Ends as last KIDS runs off stage

#18—The Politics Of Dancing (Underscore #1)

(Track 18)

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Scene 8 – In T he Mayor’s House

SET—The library of the Mayor’s home is SL. In addition to bookcases, there is a chair, a side table and lamp. SR turns dark, as if outside of the house.

MONA Entering—The mayor and Chad are already on stage as if in conversation Darling, this outrageous behavior must not go unpunished. These kids are flagrantly breaking the law. Dancing in the streets?

MAYOR But sweetheart, Snaphappy has always been about dance.

MONA Oh no. It must be stopped! For everyone concerned!

MAYOR But why are you so against dancing? Really, I don’t understand.

MONA Well, what I understand is that YOU have become the laughing stock around here because your very own son is practically leading the parade to humiliate you and me with his rebellious attitude. Now we have to put a stop to this nonsense once and for all.

CHAD I’m not making a laughing stock of you. You don’t need any help from me to do that!

MAYOR Chad! Enough!

(To Mona) Mona, what would you like me to do?

MONA (As if casting a spell) What can you do? You can double, no triple the dance tax immediately!

MAYOR & CHAD (Together) What?

MONA Yes, when it hits them in the pocketbook perhaps the enabling parents of this town will finally get some control over their children. And it might start with you Mr. Mayor. It might start with you getting that son of yours under control.

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MAYOR But, MONA!

MONA Did you hear me? Mr. Mayor. Get your son under control.

MONA exits.

MAYOR But MONA, He’s your son too now, and I…

CHAD She is not!

MAYOR Oh Chad! Can’t you at least try to get along with Mona?

CHAD No! I want my real Mom back!

MAYOR (Frustrated) Chad you know that can’t happen.

(Softening) Look Chad, I know it’s hard and it might seem like if you give Mona a chance you are somehow showing disrespect to your mother, may she rest in peace. But your mother would want you to give Mona a chance. You’re big enough and old enough to understand that you can love them both.

(Chad doesn’t answer) What am I going to do with you?

CHAD Just leave me alone.

MAYOR Okay. Okay.

(Shaking his head) We’ll talk about it later.

The MAYOR exits, chasing after Mona.

#19—Your Mama Don’t Dance (Underscore)

(Track 19)

SET—The backdrop SR changes to a few trees and greenery indicating a neighborhood street in Snaphappy. BOTH stepping on stage, Emma start teaching Lucas how to dance.

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EMMA You can.

LUCAS I can’t

EMMA You still play sports?

LUCAS Yessss!

EMMA Can you count?

LUCAS Yessss!

EMMA Good. Then you can do this.

LUCAS Really

EMMA Shush! And…

SHE shows him steps. LUCAS reluctantly tries.

LUCAS I can’t.

EMMA Yes you can. And one, jump back. Two, jump back. Side, Side, step, step!

LUCAS tries harder. You’re getting it, you know.

LUCAS (reluctantly) I know…

A big smile comes across his face. HE keeps looking down at his feet. EMMA raises his chin and stares in his eyes. The smile gets bigger as she gets so excited that he’s doing well and she does a cartwheel or other amazing cheerleading move. Feeling supported and doing something he NEVER thought he could do, Lucas starts going crazy with his moves. He stops, and just stares at Emma as the LIGHTS FADE.

#20—Neutron Dance (Underscore #3)

(Track 20)

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Scene 9- In T he New, Condensed, D-D-D Dance Studio

TOMMY (Appearing far stage right, holding a new Snaphappy Herald) (Yelling) Extra! Extra! Mayor Lightfoot announces that he is tripling the Dance Tax in Snaphappy.

As TOMMY leaves the stage the D-D-D Dance Studio is revealed, now crammed into a very small dance space. SET—A much smaller and slightly rundown Dance Studio space now, a fraction of the space of the original D-D-D Dance Studio. It is clearly an abandoned space that Don and Daphne have just acquired. There is no signage for the studio, no pictures on the walls, only outlines where the former tenant had pictures at one time. The coat rack, plant and dance bar were moved from the old space.

#21—Shake Your Groove Thing/Shake Your Booty

(Track 21)

DAPHNE (Speaking) Ok everybody, let’s make this smaller space work!! 1, 2, 3 & 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 1, 2, 3,

DANCER 1 Ouch! You’re stepping on my toes.

DAPHNE 1, 2, 3 & 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 1, 2, 3,

DANCER 2 I can’t help it. There’s no room to move in here.

DAPHNE Keep it tight, everybody. Try not to bump into each other. Got that?!? Bob, Susan, you take the duet.

ALL: (Speaking all together) Right!?!?! Are you kidding me? Ugh! Whatever! Etc.

DAPHNE I know, I know. All together now! 5, 6, 7, 8!

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The stage lighting suddenly goes dark with two spots on BOB and SUSAN.

BOB (Optional) & SUSAN (singing) THERE’S NOTHING MORE THAT I’D LIKE TO DO THAN TAKE THE FLOOR AND DANCE WITH YOU.

The lighting then starts “dancing”, emulating a Disco Dance floor in the 1970’s.

ALL KEEP DANCIN’. LET’S KEEP DANCIN’.

Suddenly, we see MONA in the corner hiding behind a large plant again, also holding a broom, spying on the situation. She is constantly trying to duck out of the way. But we can see a “different” Mona, almost missing the fun of dancing that she only knew long ago.

CHORUS SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE. SHAKE YOUR BOOTY.

VARIOUS DANCERS (Speaking) Oww!

CHORUS SHAKE YOUR BOOTY!

VARIOUS DANCERS Watch it!

CHORUS YEH, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE.

VARIOUS DANCERS Whoops!

CHORUS SHAKE YOUR BOOTY!

VARIOUS DANCERS Sorry.

CHORUS SHAKE YOUR BOOTY! BOOTY! SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING, SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING, YEAH, YEAH!

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(CHORUS) SHOW ‘EM HOW YOU DO IT NOW. SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING, YEAH, YEAH! SHOW ‘EM HOW YOU DO IT NOW. SHOW ‘EM HOW YOU DO IT NOW.

BOB & SUSAN LET’S SHOW THE WORLD WE CAN DANCE, BAD ENOUGH TA…

ALL STRUT OUR STUFF.

BOB & SUSAN THE MUSIC GIVES US A CHANCE, WE DO MORE

ALL OUT ON THE FLOOR.

DAPHNE (Speaking) Try not to bump into each other!

CHORUS (Singing) GROOVIN’ LOOSE OR HEART TO HEART

BOB & SUSAN WE PUT IN MOTION EV’RY PART.

ANXIOUS DANCER (Speaking) Move over! I need more room to express!

ALL FUNKY SOUNDS WALL TO WALL…

MAD DANCER (Speaking) That’s my foot!

ALL BUMPIN’ BOOTIES HAVIN’ US A BALL, Y’ALL SHAKE, SHAKE

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VARIOUS DANCERS Oww!

ALL SHAKE, SHAKE

VARIOUS DANCERS Sorry!

ALL SHAKE YOUR BOOTY

VARIOUS DANCERS Make way!

ALL SHAKE YOUR BOOTY

VARIOUS DANCERS Watch it!

ALL YEH, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE

VARIOUS DANCERS Whoops!

ALL SHAKE YOUR BOOTY.

VARIOUS DANCERS Sorry.

ALL SHAKE YOUR BOOTY! BOOTY!

DAPHNE (Speaking) Folks, I know this is quite an adjustment and this new tax is crazy, but let me see some energy!

ALL EV’RYBODY GET ON THE FLOOR, LET’S DANCE.

SARCASTIC DANCER (Speaking to DON) This is like dancing in a broom closet!

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ALL DON’T FIGHT THE FEELIN’, GIVE YOURSELF A CHANCE

From the shadows, MONA flings a broom at DON

DON (wondering where the broom came from) This WAS a broom closet! But it’s all we can afford now.

ALL (Singing) SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE YOUR BOOTY, SHAKE YOUR BOOTY. AW, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE YOUR BOOTY, SHAKE YOUR BOOTY. SHAKE, SHAKE

VARIOUS DANCERS Oww!?

ALL SHAKE, SHAKE.

VARIOUS DANCER What now?

ALL SHAKE YOUR BOOTY.

VARIOUS DANCERS He kicked me!

ALL SHAKE YOUR BOOTY.

VARIOUS DANCERS Whoops!

ALL YEH, SHAKE, SHAKE

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VARIOUS DANCERS Ouch!

ALL SHAKE, SHAKE

VARIOUS DANCERS Catch me! ALL SHAKE YOUR BOOTY!

VARIOUS DANCERS I can’t!

ALL SHOW ‘EM HOW YOU DO IT. SHOW ‘EM HOW YOU DO IT. SHOW ‘EM HOW YOU DO IT…

DAPHNE (Speaking) Big Finish!

ALL NOW!

Hold pose for 2 seconds. Then EVERYONE falls to the ground in a big pile (Song Ends)

#22—Shake Your Groove Thing (Underscore) As EVERYONE falls to the floor, we see MONA run off stage.

(Track 22)

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Scene 10 – Town Center

SET—Back in front of the TOWN CENTER at the end of another day. It’s twilight. In the distant Town skyline, we see that the old D-D-D Dance location is boarded up, and a new, smaller storefront has appeared. A group of kids walk on stage, rather distressed, talking about the tripling of the dance tax. A group of athletes is part of the crowd.

DELANEY Tripling the dance tax? This is going to ruin Snaphappy and everything we love about it. Look how small our Dance Studio is now. This is CRAZY!

EMMA What is the matter with the mayor? He used to be so supportive of our dancing.

TERRY It’s that new wife of his. She’s got his head so turned around he doesn’t remember all of the good things that are happening all around Snaphappy.

JOCK 1 She’s your mother, Chad! What gives?

CHAD Dude! She is not my moth…. Oh whatever.

DELANEY Listen everyone. I’ve been thinking about this and I think I know why the mayor’s new wife hates dancing so much.

KIDS What is it?

DELANEY Maybe she’s not that bad of a person… Maybe, she CAN’T DANCE. …Did you ever think of that?

#23—Orchestra Hits II

(Track 23) KIDS

Huh?

LUCAS I can understand that!

DELANEY What other possible reason could there be? She hates to see us dancing because she can’t do it herself.

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DANCER But that’s ridiculous! Everybody can dance!

DELANEY Well you and I know that. But some people just don’t think that their dancing measures up.

JOEY When I try to dance I look like a scarecrow.

HE does a silly dance My feet never go where I point them when I’m on the dance floor.

DELANEY Are you kidding me? You guys are some of the best dancers in the entire school.

LUCAS & ALL THE JOCKS (Sarcastically) Oh, right!... Sure,… Uh Huh…

DELANEY No really! Joey, show us that move you did last Friday night when you spun around that defender and went in for a perfect layup.

JOEY Throw me a ball… You mean this?

(HE does a spin and a jump.)

DELANEY In the dance world that’s a pirouette and a jete’.

JOEY In my world it’s called good for 2!

JOCKS all laugh and give each other high fives.

JENNY And Jimmy, remember that warm up routine you do before you step into the batters box?

JIMMY (demonstrating) Oh you mean my tap, tap, scuff, scuff, hitch my belt, tip my hat and slide forward?

JENNY Exactly! That’s like the greatest country line dance I’ve ever seen!

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DELANEY And Lucas, you know what Emma taught you is just your natural, athletic moves, right?

LUCAS (looking at Emma) Uhhhh… right!

EMMA (Doing a cheerleading jump.) Go me!

#24—Bust A Move

(Track 24)

All the JOCKS start showing off their moves. All their moves are athletic, but the audience starts to see how they can be considered dance moves. The jocks ad-lib… “Look at this!”. “Hey, I’m dancing!”, “I’m the king of the world!”

LUCAS (Speaking) Come on Snaphappy Football Stars! Run your drills!

(rapping) THIS HERE’S A TALE FOR ALL THE FELLAS TRYIN’ TO DO WHAT THE LADIES TELL US. GET SHOT DOWN ‘CAUSE YOU’RE OVERZEALOUS. PLAY HARD TO GET: FEMALES GET JEALOUS.

GIRLS (Singing) AH.

CHAD (rapping) NEXT DAY’S FUNCTION HIGH-CLASS LUNCHEON, FOOD IS SERVED AND YOU’RE STONE-COLD MUNCHIN’

GIRLS (Singing) AH.

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GIRLS AH, HEY, AH, YEAH, AH, HEY, YEAH, AH

GUYS JUST BUST A MOVE, JUST BUST A MOVE, JUST BUST A MOVE!

LUCAS, CHAD & GUYS JUST BUST A MOVE

GIRLS (Singing) YOU WANT IT, YOU GOT. YOU WANT IT, BABY, YOU GOT IT

LUCAS, CHAD & GUYS JUST BUST A MOVE

GIRLS YOU WANT IT, YOU GOT IT. YOU WANT IT, BABY, YOU GOT IT

GUYS BUST A MOVE. IT’S GOTCHA IN THE GROOVE.

LUCAS, CHAD & GUYS JUST BUST A MOVE

EMMA (rapping) GIRLS ARE FAKIN’ GOODNESS SAKIN’ THEY WANT A MAN

CHEERLEADERS (rapping) FAKIN’, SAKIN’

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EMMA & CHEERLEADERS (rapping) WHO BRINGS HOME THE BACON

CHEERLEADERS (rapping) GOT NO MONEY

EMMA (rapping) AND YOU GOT NO CAR

EMMA & CHEERLEADERS (rapping) THEN YOU GOT NO WOMAN

EMMA (rapping) AND THERE YOU ARE.

GIRLS (Singing over the guys) AH, HEY, AH, YEAH AH, HEY, YEAH, AH

GUYS (Rapping) JUST BUST A MOVE! JUST BUST A MOVE! JUST BUST A MOVE! JUST BUST A MOVE!

GIRLS YOU WANT IT, YOU GOT IT. YOU WANT, BABY, YOU GOT IT.

GUYS BUST A MOVE. IT’S GOTCHA IN THE GROOVE. JUST BUST A MOVE.

GIRLS YOU WANT IT, YOU GOT IT. YOU WANT, BABY, YOU GOT IT.

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GUYS BUST A MOVE. IT’S GOTCHA IN THE GROOVE. JUST BUST A MOVE.

DELANEY (Speaking) Baseball Stars, show your stuff!

SFX—Crack of a bat SFX—Crack of a bat

ONE GUY Got it!

SFX—Crack of a bat SFX—Crack of a bat

ANOTHER GUY (Yelled) He’s safe!

CHEERLEADERS (rapping over Girls and Guys) YAY! GO! YAY! GO!

GIRLS (Rap over guys) DANCE! BUST A BUST A MOVE! COME ON! BUST A BUST A MOVE! DANCE! BUST A BUST A MOVE! COME ON! BUST A BUST A MOVE!

GUYS (Rap over girls) HIT THE BALL! JUST BUST A MOVE! SCRAMBLE! JUST BUST A MOVE! BATTER UP! JUST BUST A MOVE! HOME RUN! JUST BUST A MOVE!

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CHAD (Singing) YOU’VE GOT TO BUST A MOVE. BUST A BUST A MOVE HIT THE FIELD! HIT THE FLOOR!

ALL BUST A MOVE NOW!

CHAD (Singing) YOU’VE GOT TO BUST A MOVE. BUST A BUST A MOVE HIT THE FIELD! HIT THE FLOOR!

ALL BUST A MOVE NOW!

CHAD (Singing) YOU’VE GOT TO BUST A MOVE. BUST A BUST A MOVE HIT THE FIELD! HIT THE FLOOR!

ALL BUST A MOVE NOW!

CHAD (Singing) COME ON, COME ON!

GIRLS YOU WANT IT, YOU GOT IT. YOU WANT IT, BABY YOU GOT IT.

GUYS BUST A MOVE. IT’S GOTCHA IN THE GROOVE.

(rap) JUST BUST A MOVE!

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CHAD (Singing) BUST A, BUST A, BUST A MOVE, YEH!

GIRLS YOU WANT IT, YOU GOT IT. YOU WANT IT, BABY YOU GOT IT.

GUYS BUST A MOVE. IT’S GOTCHA IN THE GROOVE.

(rap) JUST BUST A MOVE!

CHAD (Singing) BUST A, BUST A, BUST A MOVE, YEH!

ALL YEH!

(Song ends)

DELANEY Wow! That was so fun!

CHAD You’re right!

(talking to all the kids) Hey everybody I’ve got a great idea.

DELANEY What is it CHAD?

CHAD Well, next week is graduation. After the seniors get their diplomas there is always the traditional celebration dance we always do, right?

DELANEY Not this year.

MR. WIZZLE steps on stage, reading a bulletin sent out to the entire student body.

MR. WIZZLE (very seriously) “To the entire student body, since Snaphappy High can’t afford the mayor’s new dance tax, there will be no dancing at graduation this year.”

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ALL KIDS (shocked) But Mr. Wizzle!

MR. WIZZLE Weasel!

(Gets flustered) Wizzle! Weasel! Whatever!

He exits

CHAD Settle down everyone… It will be okay. If dancing is not allowed in Snaphappy we’ll just have to find a substitute way to celebrate.

DELANEY No dancing?

CHAD No dancing, but… Hey everyone… huddle up!

The CAST gets in a very animated huddle EMMA crosses the stage doing a series of cheerleader moves, cheering them on as they keep shushing her. One! Two! Three Break!

The huddle breaks up.

CHAD Okay everybody! See you at graduation and don’t forget… no dancing!

ALL All right!

THEY all exit except DELANEY and CHAD

DELANEY Chad? Your idea?

CHAD Pretty stupid, huh?

DELANEY Pretty brilliant, huh.

CHAD Do you really think it will work?

DELANEY Yeah. I really do.

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CHAD Really?

DELANEY Really!

CHAD and DELANEY look lovingly at each other.

CHAD Thanks.

DELANEY (getting caught up in the moment)’ You come up with the best ideas…

CHAD Do I?

DELANEY Yup. You do…

CHAD Ummmm…

DELANEY You know…

THEY move toward a kiss but then catch themselves and back off a little embarrassed, instead shaking hands.

CHAD I’ll… uh… see you at graduation!

DELANEY See you there.

CHAD (wagging his finger playfully) Remember… no dancing.

DELANEY (with a wink) What’s dancing?

THEY both exit.

#25—Boogie Wonderland (Underscore) Scene changes to the library at the Mayor’s home.

(Track 25)

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Scene 11

SET—The library of the Mayor’s home is SL. In addition to bookcases, there is a chair, a side table and lamp. SR is dark, it will become the location of the “Flashback”. The Mayor and Mona have been arguing.

MAYOR (Pleading) Please? Just share a little…

MONA No.

MAYOR But sweetheart, if you just…

MONA (getting the nerve to confess…) OKAY! I’ll tell you why I hate all this dancing! It’s because…

MAYOR Yes?

MONA Because… When I was a little girl…

SET—transitions to the Flashback on Stage R. The lights and/or backdrop should resemble a back in time, 1960 Dance Studio look. MONA grabs the Mayor’s hand, pulling him into the flashback with her. The lights on Stage L fade.

#26—The Flashback Dance (Underscore)

(Track 26)

A few DANCERS, including YOUNG MONA, with 1960’s clothing and hairstyles enter slowly. There is a dance TEACHER giving instructions. The audience only sees the back of the dance instructor, (who is actually Mona’s mother)

DANCE INSTRUCTOR/MOTHER Okay! Class let’s do it again! 5, 6, 7, 8!

The CLASS dances a routine. Young Mona is obviously not the best of show but is trying. She gives us a taste of what her dance will ultimately be at the climax of the show. (stopping everyone) Mona! Mona! You’re doing it all wrong! When I say “left” you go right! When I say “down” you go up! Mona! Mona! What’s the matter with you? Everybody is getting it but you and you’re part of a dance family!

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YOUNG MONA But Mom! I’m trying!

DANCE INSTRUCTOR/MOTHER Stop!!

YOUNG MONA But mother!! I can’t do it the way you want me to.

DANCE INSTRUCTOR/MOTHER Mona! Mona! Stop dancing!! You’re an embarrassment to the entire family!

The music stops and the other DANCERS are laughing and pointing at Mona, who covers her face as if crying. The lights come up on Stage L and fade on Stage R as we come back to the present at the Mayor’s house.

MAYOR Your own mother!

MONA (sadly) Do you understand now? I can’t dance! And it’s not that I’m just bad. I look ridiculous! I’ve tried over and over, only to become a laughing stock for everyone around me! Yes, I’ve seen how the folks around here enjoy dancing, even at that crazy D-D-D Dance studio, but it’s not for me.

MAYOR (sympathetically) Oh sweetheart, I’m so sorry. To be put down like that in front of your friends by your own mother must have been so humiliating!

MONA Humiliating is an understatement. I just wanted to disappear!

MAYOR Oh come on now, Mona. Things have changed since you were a little girl. And maybe you can make things change with your child.

MONA You mean Chad?

CHAD walks in the front door not realizing the intensity of the situation.

CHAD Hey Dad, what’s going on here?

(attempting to make a joke) Are you two “getting’ jiggy” with it?

— 58 —

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MONA (Charges over to Chad) Chad! Chad, young man! That is quite enough!

CHAD But… but…

MONA Chad! All your participation with dancing has got to stop. Can’t you see that you are an embarrassment to the whole family?!

Suddenly the MOTHER from the Flashback comes on stage R and shouts at Mona

MOTHER Mona! You’re an embarrassment to the whole family!

MONA (startled, but still angry) No! That’s the final word to both of you. It’s dance or me. You have to choose!

CHAD Great! Let’s dance!

MAYOR (perturbed) Chad!

CHAD Well, if I get to choose between a monster for a mother or dance… guess what I’m gonna choose?

MAYOR That’s enough of that.

CHAD You’re right, Dad. It IS enough! I’m out of here.

(Starts to leave)

MAYOR Oh Chad, come on.

MONA He’s just being dramatic.

CHAD Oh really? Dramatic? You two have a great time at the graduation ceremony. I don’t feel like going.

(HE leaves)

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MAYOR Chad! Chad!

MONA Well there you go.

MAYOR (He thinks) Aw Mona, can’t you see things from his point of view? Dance has been a big part of his life. You, if anyone, should know about a child’s relationship with his mother. And dance was a big part of his relationship with his mother, too. It’s hard for him to give it up.

MONA (speaking volumes with two words) I do…

SHE exits

MAYOR What a mess!

The MAYOR exits following Mona.

#27—The Politics of Dancing (Underscore #2)

(Track 27)

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Scene 11a – On T he Way To Graduation

SET—ACTORS appear either Downstage L or R in front of a curtain, or in the audience near the stage. DELANEY rushes on, holding her graduation robe, with some of the other kids.

DELANEY Emma? Lucas? Has any body seen Chad?

EMMA No. What happened?

DELANEY Oh he had a terrible fight with his dad and stepmother and now I think he’s going to skip the whole graduation ceremony.

EMMA Skip graduation? That means no diploma.

LUCAS No diploma? How will he get a job?

DELANEY Oh I sure hope he shows up. Look, the ceremony is about to begin.

EMMA Get in your places. I’ll save a spot for Chad.

LUCAS Maybe he got stuck in traffic.

EMMA Traffic? In Snaphappy?

LUCAS Okay, maybe not.

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Scene 12 – Graduation Ceremony At T he Town Square

SET—Back in the TOWN CENTER PARK OF SNAPHAPPY, OHIO—Against the backdrop of a Middle American small town street, this scene takes place in and around the Town Center Stage, with a Gazebo style platform set piece, now decorated with bunting for the Graduation ceremony. There are also multiple benches lined up in two sets of rows Stage L and R, where the Students will sit on one side and the Townsfolk will sit on the other. The entire cast of STUDENTS are dressed in cap and gowns.

#28—Pomp and CircumsDance

(Track 28)

EVERYONE sings in a slightly depressed tone.

TOWNSFOLK & KIDS CHORUS WHY, OH WHY, OH WHY IS THIS TAX SO HIGH? WHY CAN’T WE DANCE? WE CAN’T AFFORD IT. WHY, OH WHY, OH WHY HOW CAN I SURVIVE? SITTING ‘ROUND THIS TOWN IN A TRANCE ‘CAUSE WE CAN’T DANCE.

Song Ends

MR. WIZZLE Thank you band for your wonderful rendition of Pomp and Circumdance…

ALL (Excited) What? Huh,

(gasps)

MR. WIZZLE I mean stance!

ALL (Disappointed) Oh…!

Moving on, MR. WIZZLE introduces the mayor.

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MR. WIZZLE Ladies and gentlemen! Our guest speaker for today’s ceremony. The Mayor of Snaphappy!

MR. WIZZLE speaks to the mayor as he walks to the podium. How are you, Mr. Mayor?

MAYOR Well, Mr. Weasle…

MR. WIZZLE Wizzle, Wizzle, it’s Wizzle!

MAYOR Oh, sorry… Have you seen my son?

MR. WIZZLE You son? Chad? Is he missing?

MAYOR Yes, well we had a sort of disagreement and now I’m afraid he may not show up for the own graduation.

MR. WIZZLE No graduation? No diploma. Oh, I’m sure he’ll show up. Maybe he got stuck in traffic.

MAYOR Traffic? Really, in Snaphappy?

MR. WIZZLE Okay. Maybe not. Anyway, you’re on.

MAYOR (Speaking from the podium) Ladies and gentle, Mom’s and Dad’s, graduating students and all my fellow citizens of Snap…

(HE starts to snap but just shrugs like what’s the point) …happy. We gather together today to celebrate the crowning achievement of your years here at Snaphappy High School. Although I know we traditionally celebrate this moment with a big ALL-SCHOOL Dance number, I hope you will agree with me that a quiet and dignified ceremony is a nice change of pace. Thank you and congratulations.

LUCAS (frustrated) Who’s he kidding? This is the most boring ceremony in the history of graduations! What was the point of me trying to learn to dance anyway?

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EMMA Oh Lucas!

(as in “Lookie here”) SHE does a slow cheerleader move that is incredibly unique and athletic.

LUCAS (to the audience) That girl is amazing.

MONA enters surreptitiously from the audience aisle, having watched all this.

MR. WIZZLE And now the person you have chosen to be your class speaker for the Class of 1995, please welcome DELANEY DUZWELL to the podium.

Polite applause.

DELANEY Fellow classmates! I want to congratulate us all on our achievements here at Snaphappy. Climb Every Mountain! Dream the Impossible Dream! We’ve Only Just Begun! Be True To Your School! Forever and ever…

REVEREND CARESALOT Amen!

DELANEY Now, Although we won’t be dancing together at this year’s ceremony the kids from the athletic department have come up with a little presentation all on their own as an affordable, tax-free substitution to “appropriately” conclude these graduation exercises.

CHAD rushes in.

ALL (happy to see him) Chad!!

CHAD Hey everybody sorry I’m late.

(looking at the audience.) The traffic!

DELANEY Chad I’m so glad you’re here. Ready fellas?

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JOCKS (in booming voices) We’re ready!

DELANEY Hit it D.J.!

#29—Walking on Sunshine

(Track 29)

The lighting begins to increase in intensity and fully light up the stage, representing “sunshine”. The D.J. for the event is set up, up stage near the Gazebo. As the music begins, the STUDENTS and ATHLETES take off their robes, to reveal their athletic uniforms and general athletic wear. They are all led by LUCAS. THEY dance, although it looks more like exercising than dancing. Soon the CHEERLEADERS, then all the STUDENTS join them.

JOCKS Yeh!

MONA (trying to keep up her front) Mr. Mayor, what is going on here?

JOCKS Hey! And throw! Whee! Yeh!

MAYOR I don’t know sweetheart. Just some sporting demonstration, I guess.

JOCKS Hey! And throw!

DELANEY (Singing) I USED TO THINK MAYBE YOU LOVED ME

JOCKS NOW, BABY I’M SURE. HEY! AND THROW!

DELANEY AND I JUST CAN’T WAIT ‘TIL THE DAY

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JOCKS WHEN YOU KNOCK ON MY DOOR. HEY! AND THROW!

DELANEY NOW, EVERY TIME…

JOCKS HEY! HEY!

DELANEY I GO FOR THE MAILBOX

JOCKS HEY! HEY!

DELANEY GOTTA HOLD MYSELF DOWN

JOCKS HEY! HEY! HEY! AND THROW!

DELANEY ‘CAUSE I JUST CAN’T WAIT TILL YOU WRITE

JOCKS ME YOU’RE COMIN’ AROUND.

KIDS CHORUS & DELANEY WE’RE WALKIN’ ON SUNSHINE

KID’S CHORUS WHOA…

KIDS CHORUS & DELANEY WE’RE WALKIN’ ON SUNSHINE

KID’S CHORUS WHOA…

KIDS CHORUS & DELANEY (I’M) WE’RE WALKIN’ ON SUNSHINE

KID’S CHORUS WHOA OH YEH!

KIDS CHORUS & DELANEY AND DON’T IT FEEL GOOD!

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KID’S CHORUS HEY!

DELANEY ALRIGHT NOW!

KIDS CHORUS & DELANEY AND DON’T IT FEEL GOOD!

KID’S CHORUS HEY!

KIDS CHORUS & DELANEY YEAH, DON’T IT FEEL GOOD!

KID’S CHORUS WHEE!

(The rest of the CAST take off their robes and join in what is now a real dance.)

MONA (Incensed) Mr. Mayor! THIS IS DANCING! Please make it stop…

KID’S CHORUS YEH!

MAYOR Oh Honey, Let them have fun.

KIDS’ CHORUS HEY! AND THROW! WHEE!

MONA (more and more agitated) Fun? Fun!? This is not a time for fun! These kids are dancing and you promised me!

KID’S CHORUS HEY! AND THROW! WE’RE WALKIN’ ON SUNSHINE. WHOA… WE’RE WALKIN’ ON SUNSHINE. WHOA… WE’RE WALKIN’ ON SUNSHINE. WHOA… OH YEH! AND DON’T IT FEEL GOOD!

Song Ends – goes directly into Dancing Machine

#30 – Dancing Machine

(Track 30)

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#30—Dancing Machine

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(Track 30)

The lights fade slightly on the full stage to give focus on the MAYOR and MONA.

MAYOR Oh just relax, dear.

MONA Relax?! I’ll show you relax!

The CROWD backs away so she can get up to the DJ. Underscoring continues with only a steady kick drumbeat and MONA LIGHTFOOT walks over to the DJ Stand. MONA, with her back to the audience, does all kinds of crazy antics trying to get the DJ to stop playing the music, including elements of the “Mona Dance”. The rest of the KIDS stop to watch her and then assume that all of her crazy antics are the latest dance craze. They start duplicating every move she makes. Stop that! Stop that! You there! Stop that music! And all of you, NO dancing… Stop that music and that dancing… at… once! I am the mayor’s wife and I demand that you stop immediately!

TAYLOR Wow! Look at the mayor’s wife! She’s got some great new moves!

TANYA All right! Now we’re talking!

NOAH I love the way she shakes her groove thing!

TAYLOR, NOAH & TANYA TRIO (Singing) DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’.

ALL SHE’S A DANCIN’ MACHINE!

MONA (Speaking) Stop that music. I’m warning you!

PARENT I haven’t seen moves like that since… well… actually I’ve never seen moves like that.

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ALL (Singing) AUTOMATIC, SYSTEMATIC, FULL OF COLOR SELF-CONTAINED

PARENT 2 She’s fantastic!

MONA Stop it! I said, stop it!

ALL CAPTIVATING, STIMULATING, SHE’S SUCH A LADY

TWIN 1 How does she do it?

TWIN 2 Come on! Let’s try!

The KIDS all start doing Mona’s dance moves.

ALL DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’ DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’ DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’ DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’

MONA (Notices eventually) What’s goin on? What is this?

MAYOR The kids all love the new dance you’ve created.

ALL LOVE DANCIN’!

MONA New dance? Are you crazy?

DELANEY Crazy for your new dance, Mrs. Lightfoot!

MONA My new what?

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ALL YOUR DANCIN’!

MONA Dancing? Me? Really?

MAYOR Just watch!

The KIDS dance some more. SHE’S A DANCE, DANCE, DANCE, DANCE, DANCING MACHINE. WATCH HER GET DOWN, WATCH HER GET DOWN, AS SHE DO, DO, DO HER THING ON THE SCENE! SHE’S A DANCE, DANCE, DANCE, DANCE, DANCING MACHINE. WATCH HER GET DOWN, WATCH HER GET DOWN, AS SHE DO, DO, DO HER THING ON THE SCENE!

LUCAS (Speaking) Check it out, Mrs. Lightfoot! We learned it from you! EVEN ME!

MONA Me?? Really?

CHAD Really! Come on, Mom! Let’s bust a move!

MONA Mom?

MAYOR He called her Mom! He called her Mom!

ALL Cheers! Yay! Woo Hoo! Etc.

(singing) DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’ DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’ DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’ DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’, DANCIN’

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(ALL) SHE’S A DANCE, DANCE, DANCE, DANCE, DANCING MACHINE. WATCH HER GET DOWN, WATCH HER GET DOWN, AS SHE DO, DO, DO HER THING ON THE SCENE! SHE’S A DANCE, DANCE, DANCE, DANCE, DANCING MACHINE. WATCH HER GET DOWN, WATCH HER GET DOWN, AS SHE DO, DO, DO HER THING ON THE SCENE! AS SHE DO, DO, DO HER THING ON THE SCENE. AS SHE DO, DO, DO HER THING SHE’S A DANCIN’ MACHINE! YEH!

(Song Ends)

MAYOR And so on this auspicious occasion, as Mayor of Snap

(2 snaps) happy, Ohio, USA I proudly pronounce you ALL fully graduated.

ALL cheer and throw their hats in the air. Madam Mayor! You’re awesome.

MONA I am?

MAYOR & CHAD You are!

CHAD (To DELANEY) And Delaney, you’re awesome!

DELANEY No, You’re awesome.

LUCAS Emma, you’re awesome!

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EMMA No, you’re awesome!

MAYOR Ah what the heck…

ALL We’re all awesome!

ALL cheer and applaud

#31—Do You Want To Dance (Up Tempo)

(Track 31)

(The music strikes up again and there is a big closing number led by CHAD, DELANEY, THE MAYOR, MONA, LUCAS and EMMA.)

MAYOR (To his wife) Madam Mayor. Do you wanna dance?

MONA thinks about it while all are watching her with anticipation.

MONA (Smiles) Oh what the heck!

(2 snaps) Lets do it!

ALL (Singing) YEAH! DO YOU WANNA DANCE AND HOLD MY HAND, TELL ME BABY I’M YOUR LOVER MAN? OH BABY, DO YOU WANT TO DANCE?

GUYS DO YOU WANNA DANCE UNDER THE MOONLIGHT

GIRLS HOLD ME BABY ALL THROUGH THE NIGHT, OH…

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ALL BABY, DO YOU WANNA DANCE? DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA WANNA DANCE? DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA WANNA DANCE? DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YOU WANT TO DANCE?

Dance Section DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA WANNA DANCE? DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA WANNA DANCE? DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA… DO YOU WANT TO DANCE?

SMALL MALE & FEMALE GROUPS (descant over other singers) AH, AH, AH!

ALL OTHERS DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA WANNA DANCE? DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA WANNA DANCE? DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA… DO YOU WANT TO DANCE?

ALL DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA, DO YA DO YA WANNA DANCE? DO YA WANNA DANCE? DO YA WANNA DANCE? DO YA WANNA DANCE? YEH!

Song Ends

#32—Mega-Mix Bows

(Track 32)

The BOWS/Curtain Call will be a mega mix medley of the songs in the musical. **In the PROJECTION PACKAGE for this show, the backdrop will change as each different song is sung by the cast.

DAPHNE (Singing) I FIND ROMANCE WHEN I START TO DANCE

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(DAPHNE) IN BOOGIE WONDERLAND! I FIND ROMANCE WHEN I START TO DANCE IN BOOGIE WONDERLAND!

CHORUS DANCE! HOO HOO HOO DANCE! BOOGIE WONDERLAND. AH, HAH DANCE. HOO HOO HOO DANCE! BOOGIE WONDERLAND! YEAHEE, YEAHEE, YEAH!

Song changes

EMMA GIRLS ARE FAKIN’ GOODNESS SAKIN’

CHEERLEADERS FAKIN’ SAKIN’

EMMA THEY WANT A MAN

EMMA & CHEERLEADERS WHO BRINGS HOME THE BACON

CHEERLEADERS GOT NO MONEY

EMMA AND YOU GOT NO CAR

EMMA & CHEERLEADERS THEN YOU GOT NO WOMAN

EMMA AND THERE YOU ARE.

ALL AH! HEY! AH YEAH! JUST BUST A MOVE! JUST BUST A MOVE! AH! HEY! YEAH, AH, JUST BUST A MOVE!

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(ALL) YOUR WANT IT. YOU GOT IT! BUST A MOVE. IT’S GOTCHA IN THE GROOVE. YOU WANT IT. BABY, YOU GOT IT! JUST BUST A MOVE! YOU WANT, YOU GOT IT. YOUR WANT IT, BABY, YOU GOT IT. BUST A MOVE, IT’S GOTCHA IN THE GROOVE. JUST BUST A MOVE!

Song changes EV’RYBODY GET ON THE FLOOR, LET’S DANCE DON’T FIGHT THE FEELIN’, GIVE YOURSELF A CHANCE. SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE YOUR BOOTY, SHAKE YOUR BOOTY. AW, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE. SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE. SHAKE YOUR BOOTY, NOW!

Song changes WHOO, OOOH, NO! NO! WHOO, OOOH, NO TAX! AND IT’S HARD TO SAY, JUST HOW SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE. AND IT’S HARD TO FIND ANY STRENGTH TO DRAW THE LINE. OH, I’M JUST BURNING DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE. I’M JUST BURNING DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE. YES, WE’RE DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE. BUT, NO DANCE TAX!

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(ALL) YES, WE’RE DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE FEET DON’T FAIL ME NOW. YES, WE’RE DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE. BUT, NO DANCE TAX! YES, WE’RE DOING THE NEUTRON DANCE. FEET DON’T FAIL ME NOW!

CAST takes a final bow and the curtain closes on Snaphappy, Ohio. T he End

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