Methodist Message: February 2022 by Methodist Message

THE METHODIST CHURCH IN SINGAPORE

ISSN 0129-6868 MCI (P) 044/11/2021

Vo l 1 2 4 N o 2 F E B R U A R Y 2 0 2 2

Methodist Social Principles:

The Sphere of the Family

Contents 1

Bishop’s Message

Events—Coming Up

Church Life—TRAC Highlights

Church Profile—Paya Lebar Methodist Church

People—Cecil Wong and Bishop Dr Gordon Wong

People—A. Susila

Church Life—Spreading the joy of Christmas in the heartlands

Opinion—Three ways to have a better LNY

Opinion—A time for meaningful conversations

Opinion—LNY: A Christian Perspective

Reach Out—Welfare Services

Reach Out—Missions

Relationships—You & Your family

Hymns & Songs

Opinion—Soundings

Opinion—THINK

Poem

What does being a Methodist mean to you?

Events—Looking Ahead

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EDITORIAL BOARD

.o rg .s g

The official monthly publication of The Methodist Church in Singapore. Published material does not necessarily reflect the official view of The Methodist Church.

Adviser and Publisher Dr Anthony Goh Chairperson Council on Communications

Editor Sheri Goh

Sub-editor

All Scripture quoted is based on the English Standard Version unless otherwise stated. 70 Barker Road #06-04 Singapore 309936 6478-4793 | 6478-4763 message.methodist.org.sg | www.methodist.org.sg newmm@methodist.org.sg

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BISHOP’S MESSAGE Bishop Dr Gordon Wong was elected Bishop of The Methodist Church in Singapore in 2020. He served as President of the Trinity Annual Conference from 2013–2020.

God places the lonely in families “A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families […].” (Ps 68:5–6 NIV)

ccording to UNICEF, there are an estimated 153 million children worldwide who are orphans. UNICEF defines an orphan as a child (18 years old or younger) who has lost one or both parents. This number would be much larger if we were to include children

where one or both parents have abandoned their child, or are no longer able to live with their child due to incarceration or other worrying reasons. In Singapore, there are about 800 children who have been placed in children’s homes because of such reasons. This issue of Methodist Message focuses on the Sphere of the Family. We all believe that it is so important and precious to belong to a loving and supportive family. Sadly, we can probably add to the number of “orphans” in this world if we include those who have been, not just abandoned or forgotten, but rejected and excluded. And of course, the number would be even larger if we were to include, not just children 18 years old or younger, but adult children who no longer enjoy the support of a family, through any one or more of the reasons mentioned above. The Bible, in Psalm 68:5, describes God as the “father of orphans” (NRSV), but then in the very next verse describes the orphan more broadly as one who is desolate or lonely. “God sets the lonely in families” (NIV). We believe in a God who “makes a home for the lonely” (NAS). We live in a world where many of us are, or feel, orphaned and lonely. God wants to set us all in loving families. Let’s not turn people away from our families, but instead let us work with God to be a family that welcomes orphans and all who are lonely. For we serve a God who is “the father of orphans” and who “sets the lonely in families”.

https://www.sos-usa.org/our-impact/focus-areas/advocacy-movement-building/childrens-statistics

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

Events ¢ Coming Up

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FLOW 2.0 Digging

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Doing Co Deeper into

Worship

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Friday, 8-10

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Rev Andrew Eastes

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Glenn Stallsmith

Dr Adam Perez

Jonathan Ottaway

low2 rl.com/ssiw-f https://tinyu QR code: or scan the

rson. re the webinar. e is S$20 per pe you the day befo to d le ai em Registration fe be de will cluding passco usic.edu.sg Zoom details in at worship@msm us l ai em se ea pl , For enquiries

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

Deborah An Wong

Church Life ¢ TRAC Highlights Alison Lai is a counsellor at Barker Road Methodist Church.

How has COVID-19 transformed your family life?

iving in the wake of a pandemic has meant living with unrecognised loss—the loss of things we used to take for granted, such as meeting friends in large groups, playing football, having a class reunion or travelling. Christmas celebrations were curbed, the New Year was subdued and now Lunar New Year will follow suit due to safe management guidelines. Quiet, intimate gatherings are the order of the day. Lunar New Year routines will change— angpaos have gone digital to limit contact surfaces; snacks portioned out and tightly sealed; sofas and coffee tables sanitised once visitors leave. Children are increasingly meeting their friends and playing games virtually instead of hanging out or playing sports together. How do we limit their screen time since this is their new way of interacting? Would we rather they not have this channel of communication at all? Because we were stuck at home, my family’s attempt to spend time together led my dad to teach us how to play mahjong. Why not? After all, we have enough kids at home. Aunty protested that we were teaching our kids how to gamble, but the time that we spent around the small square table led to some great chats and bonding with our kids. Being together for extended periods of time due to homebased learning and working from home has brought my family closer, but this was not the case for everyone. During the pandemic, many parents experienced increasing concerns while social supports eroded. Worries over finances, social isolation, as well as emotional upheaval added to the woes of school and childcare centre closures. Balancing work responsibilities with supervising children’s education caused great disruption and a disproportionate level of stress for families. As a result, there has been an increase in cases of domestic violence since the pandemic began.

The pandemic has left five million dead and counting, but many emotional injuries have gone unnoticed and concealed. Fear of the virus has changed the way we live our lives. Nonetheless, just as the airplane safety guideline tells us to don our own oxygen mask before helping a child, we need to prioritise our own mental health as parents so that we can respond calmly to our children and model how they can manage change, uncertainty and stress. I believe that teaching these core social emotional skills, like self-awareness, empathy, optimism and resilience are just as important as encouraging them to become expert swimmers or gifted mathematicians. But where do we even begin? Not all homes and families are safe havens of love and acceptance. We can take time to extend kindness by offering emotional support, for example, listening to others whether over the phone or FaceTime, or volunteer as a family to deliver groceries to a neighbour or clothes to a migrant worker. We can show our children how to extend compassion to others as we navigate this challenge together. Let us leave judgement behind as we focus on connection and moving forward together as a human family. Given the magnitude of this pandemic, we need to acknowledge the challenges we have faced and the exhaustion experienced, and give families permission to grieve the loss of normalcy. But let us not give the pandemic the last word. God is the Word—the Word that became flesh, the Word that is wisdom and the Word that will help us overcome. All that God is came to us in that One Powerful Word we call Jesus. He has gifted us with the capacity for resilience in and through the family and Church. The rich Biblical tradition of prayer and lamentmaking point the way forward—we can grieve and live with the loss while looking with hope to the One who triumphed over the grave. METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

Church Life ¢ Paya Lebar Methodist Church Text and photos courtesy of Paya Lebar Methodist Church

90 years old and going strong

Paya Lebar Methodist Church celebrates God’s goodness

t happened on a bus one day last June. Out of the blue, an elderly woman spoke up and asked the teenager seated beside her for some help. While the request was unexpected, it was—especially in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic—not unknown.

To all involved, it was a mind-blowing experience of “Immanuel, God with us” from beginning to end: it was God who orchestrated the meeting; God who gave form to the work and function to the painting; God who ordained the mutual blessing. 1

But God—He knew what it was about.

Similar threads of divine intervention run through PLMC’s 90-year history. Hence, instead of marking the church’s 90th merely on her 10 July birthday, the entire 2022 has been designated “The Year of Celebration”, slated for observances that remember God’s amazing goodness and faithfulness in the past, while yet positioning the church to receive what He is unveiling for her in the present and in the future.

By His leading, the “chance” meeting turned into a multi-faceted mission through which a group of young people from Paya Lebar Methodist Church (PLMC) helped this Aunty clear her home, clean it and create a painting to brighten her living space. Unbeknownst to them, their Holy Spirit-inspired work of art mirrored flowers on to those printed on the blouse Aunty wore on the day they presented the painting to her.

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

“God has woven the lives of past and present generations into a glorious ‘tapestry of power and love’, which is the theme for our year-long anniversary celebration,” said Rev Dr Kow Shih Ming, Pastor-in-Charge of PLMC, in his 2022 vision statement.

The slate of activities includes:

1. DOWN MEMORY LANE The digital exhibition highlights milestones in PLMC’s history, as well as the contributions of pastors and members. Referencing the book of Exodus’ multiple exhortations to “remember”, Rev Dr Kow said: “Remembrance challenges us to consecrate ourselves afresh. In seeing how in the past a consecrated community is blessed to bless, we are inspired to similarly consecrate ourselves to be blessed to bless. When we celebrate what God did, it builds our faith. If this is what God did, God can do it again—and more.”

2. PLMC CONFERENCE With the world still in the grips of the COVID-19 pandemic, our much-anticipated Church Camp has evolved into a Church Conference instead. Sub-themed “Generations Unbroken”, the conference (16 to 19 June) sets out to “cross-honour” and embrace the Kingdom destiny of each of the church family’s multiple generations. Keynote speakers include Pastors Edmund Chan, Chern Hock Chye and Nicholas Choo.

In addition, we will celebrate blessing the community and the nations with about S$1 million or more through the 90th Anniversary Blessing Fund. $900,000 of the Blessing Fund to bless 90 ministries and organisations will come from the church budget. The other $100,000 or more that will go to the community will come from PLMC worshippers. The second offering received on 11 of the Holy Communion Weekends in 2022 will be designated for the community through the 90th Anniversary Blessing Fund. Direct donations to the Blessing Fund will likewise be used to bless the community.

3. OUTREACH IN POWER & LOVE With our church vision as “A Family Blessed to Bless the Community and the Nations”, blessing others in the name of Christ is part of our church’s DNA. Ministries launched in the previous year’s Churchwide Engagement Programme, “40 Days of Blessing”, under the banner “Project Safe Place”, will continue, kicking off in 2022 with a blood donation drive on 6 Feb. From March to June, “Let’s Eat Together (Don’t Say Bo Jio!)” hospitality will be extended to poor and needy individuals and groups, and other pre-believers that PLMC worshippers come into contact with, with the aim of building “a bridge of relationship where Jesus can walk from our hearts into theirs”, Rev Dr Kow shared.

4. CHRISTMAS MUSICAL The anniversary celebrations will culminate with “A Christmas Tale”, a musical planned for 22, 23 and 24 Dec. This will showcase God’s plan of redemption for man from the beginning of creation, right through to the rebellion and the turning away of His chosen people, through the prophets, right up to the birth, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. All are welcome to join us. For more information and registration, go to https://sites.google.com/view/plmctoday or scan the QR code in December.

Rev Dr Kow said, “My prayer is that every PLMC worshipper, young or older, will give in faith so that they can experience the blessing of being a generous giver to the Lord.” Finally, all the work going into the Anniversary Celebrations will yield no eternal significance if we do not depend on God in everything we do. We must learn to live the truth found in the words attributed to Augustine: “Pray as though everything depended on God. Work as though everything depended on you.” Hence, we will have a church prayer meeting once a month in 2022. We started this during “40 Days of Blessing”. In 2022, we will continue to have this church prayer meeting on the first Wednesday of every month. We give all thanks and praise to our Eternal God who has richly blessed Paya Lebar Methodist Church throughout these 90 years. To God alone be the glory!

1 2

Watch the full testimony at https://sites.google.com/view/plmctoday/40dob. https://plmc.org/about/our-milestones METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

2022 Admissions Now Open ACS (International) Singapore is a distinctive international secondary school open to all Singaporeans & other nationalities, offering an all-round English-based education for students aged 12 to 18 years leading to the International General Certificate of Secondary Education (IGCSE) and the International Baccalaureate Diploma Programme (IBDP).

61 Jalan Hitam Manis, Singapore 278475

Building Through Belief, this school of choice provides

• Exceptional examination results, very strong value-added achievement and an allround holistic education • 50:50 mix of local and international teachers who uphold the dual Methodist ethos and ACS heritage • Small class sizes with overall student-teacher ratio of 8.7 : 1 • 40 different CCAs – 16 Sporting, 12 Visual and Performing Arts, 12 Special Interest Groups • Over 25 overseas trips per year • Over 200 formal student leadership positions • Scholarships for 4 Singaporeans to undertake the IBDP

Achievements include

Mr Gavin Kinch Principal

Mrs Tan Siew Hoon Vice-Principal

• Students with perfect score of 45 points in IBDP • 20 “Top in the World” awards in IGCSE examinations over each of the past nine years • Students accepted to Oxford and Cambridge universities for the past eight years • Admissions to top universities in the UK, the US, Australia and Singapore • PSLE and Singapore GCE ‘O’ Level students achieve outstanding value-added examination results for the IBDP with improved pathways to good universities • Successes at national level in Athletics, Touch Rugby, Debating, Orchestra, Volleyball, Taekwondo, Ice Hockey, Fencing, Swimming, Artistic Swimming, Rhythmic Gymnastics and Wushu.

What the parents say… Mr Christopher Hayward Vice-Principal

Dr Kristopher Achter Vice-Principal

For more information Please contact Joseph Ng or Serene Lim at +65 6472 1477 or admissions@acsinternational.edu.sg

“ACS (International) ignites students' passion to learn through building strong relationships with deeply devoted and highly experienced teachers and excellent pedagogic and sporting infrastructure. The school has achieved a fine blend of academic rigour and holistic learning. The emphasis on CCAs and community service as well as the ample opportunities for student leadership makes ACS (International) a 'cut above' and the preferred choice for our children.” Larisa and Shivinder Singh “Sending our daughter to ACS (International) was the best decision we made. She used to be shy and introverted and has now become a confident, caring and motivated student leader.” Debra and Samuel Koh “We deeply appreciate the contribution ACS (International) has made towards making our son confident, capable and thoughtful. The school has provided an environment of personal care, support and encouragement to nurture him into a compassionate young man. We are also very proud of his academic, leadership, co-curricular and public speaking skill development.” Anju Uppal “We like the holistic learning environment of ACS (International). Apart from academics, the school gives the students plenty of learning opportunities outside the walls of the classroom through service trips in continents as far as Africa, school projects and events, CCAs, student leadership roles and more. Our children thoroughly enjoy the IB programme, the holistic environment of the school, and are very proud to be students of ACS (International). The school has helped our children to grow and mature in so many ways, whilst equipping them with the necessary skills needed for their university studies and future endeavours. We are very glad to have sent both of our children to ACS (International).” Steven and Pau Kim Kan

People ¢ Sheri Goh is the Editor of Methodist Message. / Photos courtesy of Cecil Wong

Cecil Wong and Bishop Dr Gordon Wong: A conversation

ecil Wong, who turns 100 this year, is a lifelong Methodist, having attended Kampong Kapor Methodist Church (MC) and Wesley MC . He was a student at Anglo-Chinese School (ACS) and served as

a member of the ACS Board of Governors from 1955 to 1958, and was

Cecil Wong

in his office

in the 1970s

President of the ACS Old Boys’ Association from 1958 to 1960. He is also the father of David Wong, Rev Dr Norman Wong (Chaplain of the Methodist Welfare Services), Bishop Dr Gordon Wong—all ACS alumni—and Elizabeth Wong, who attended Methodist Girls’ School. Methodist Message sat down with Cecil Wong and Bishop Dr Gordon Wong to reminisce about the past, and catch up with them about life and family. Here are some excerpts from that conversation.

Cecil Wong, seated far left in middle row, in the Anglo-Chinese School cricket first XI, 1938

Cecil Wong at home in 2010

First winter in Cambridge

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

Cecil Wong and Bishop Dr Gordon Wong: A conversation

Bishop Dr Gordon Wong (GW): So, Dad, when I was

GW: Mum passed away when I was only a baby, so you

young, what did you want me to be when I grew up?

pretty much had to raise us [on your own]. Do you look back and wish you had done anything differently in the

Cecil Wong (CW): When I was young, my parents gave

way you raised us?

myself and my sister free reign [to choose what we wanted to be]. Of course, they guided us and encouraged

CW: I am generally happy because I think all of you have

us to go to church, and taught us what is right and

turned out quite well. I am proud of you all, and I’ve got

wrong, [such as] not to tell a lie. But apart from that,

a Bishop!

I was free to choose what profession I wanted to be. In those days, in Singapore, parents wanted their children

I had a good start [because] my father was a chartered

to either become doctors or lawyers. Accountants would

accountant. His company was the [one of the] first

come lower down [in status], and I suppose even going

Asian chartered accountants. He was on his own [in the

into the Church would come even lower down. 1

beginning] and he built up quite a good practice, and so I had a good start. I tried to help all of you, where and

At some point, I remember you saying that you looked

when I could.

up to Norman [i.e. Rev Dr Norman Wong], and he was already [in the Church]. In the financial world, pastors

GW: Yes, you helped us a lot! Do you have any favourite

are not as well-paid as doctors, lawyers and, of course,

memories about our times together?

businessmen. But as far as I was concerned, it was fine [for the two of you to go into the Church].

CW: We’ve had a lot of good fun together. In terms of sports, we play together, and we enjoy that. And we have parties together. During Lunar New Year, you [and your family] come around early to our place.

GW: And also on the eve—we come for the reunion dinner. Last year, because of COVID-19, we had to do it in groups. Do you remember there was a time when I got quite angry with you?

CW: We used you to call you chilli padi! Chilli is the hot stuff, and chilli padi is supposed to be even hotter. smet Cecil and Ki married Wong were1952 on 12 July

GW: I must have got angry quite often! I don’t know what led you to call me chilli padi, but I remember quite clearly once when I was probably throwing a tantrum. I must have said something along the lines of how it would be so much nicer living with Uncle Thiam Siew. 2 And you replied, “Well, if you’d like to live with him, you go ahead and ask him!” Obviously, I didn’t want that, and I just wanted to say I’m sorry, because it was a very hurtful thing for

Gordon’s second bir

thday

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

a child to say to a parent.

On Dr Chen Su Lan (the founder of Chen Su Lan Methodist Children’s Home)

CW: I had quite a few friends who were in [ACS with me] right through [from primary one to primary six]. I think of Dr Chen Chi-Nan—he was son of Dr Chen Su Lan, who was one of the first medical graduates in Cecil Wo An avid sportsman,

ng enjoys playing go

lf with his sons

Singapore. He was a Christian, of what I call the “stern Christian type”. He ran an opium clinic in Kampong Java Road. In those days, we had rickshaw pullers,

CW: I don’t even remember that at all!

and they had quite a hard life. Some of them took to opium as relief. And of course, if you imbibe too much,

GW: Do you think I’ve raised my children in a way that’s

you become an addict. That was where Dr Chen Su Lan

different from or similar to the way you’ve raised me? I

helped, by running this opium clinic.

suspect I might have raised Deborah and Jeremy 3 in very much the way that I feel you have raised me.

An act of kindness is never forgotten

CW: I agree with that in the sense that you’ve given

CW: We were staying at River Valley Road, and my father

them a free hand to do what they want.

took me in a rickshaw to Coleman Street. On my first day in school, I was dressed appropriately [in the school

GW : I think so as well. You supported us, gave us the

uniform of white shirt and blue shorts], but I didn’t have

free hand to explore, to make mistakes; you were a very

a pencil or eraser.

patient, kind, not demanding sort of father. I sat next to a boy named Cherry Quah. Cherry had two Some other extracts from their conversation: On Rev Dr Norman Wong, who was in a baby contest…

CW: Norman was a big baby—9 pounds 10 ounces [i.e. 4.4kg]. He was a very good baby. We called him a gentle giant. There was a baby contest in Cairnhill, and we entered him in it. Before it started, he was acting very good. But at the contest, when the judge picked him up, he started to make a row, and he couldn’t be stopped! So he didn’t win a prize. …and was also a star athlete

CW: When Norman was at ACS, he was in the finals of the inter-school hockey team and they won. The finals were played on the Padang, on the ground of the SRC [Singapore Recreation Club], and Minister Eddie Barker was there. He and I used to play as full-backs in the same Singapore national hockey team. When Norman joined the Church, he gave up playing hockey. One day I saw Barker and he asked, “What happened to your son?” He was looking for Norman to maybe play [hockey] for Singapore.

or three pencils and two erasers, and he immediately offered me a pencil and eraser. I didn’t even have to ask. And I will always remember that, […] and I’ve always remembered him as a good friend. He was a good badminton player, and represented his house in the house competition. Years later, when he passed away, I saw his obituary and that he had taken on a Christian name, which told me that he had become a Roman Catholic, so I was very happy for that.

GW: Yes, I remember that. And what struck me when you first told me this story about Cherry was that his little act of kindness stayed in your mind for more than 90 years. And that is what God wants us to do—to always look for opportunities to show kindness to people. Did you enjoy this conversation, Dad? It’s always nice to hear you tell stories, about different parts of your life and the different people that you’ve met. Cecil Wong’s father, Evan Wong, was one of the first qualified accountants in Singapore. He founded Evan Wong & Co, one of the first Asian chartered accountant companies. 2 Bishop Dr Wong was referring to Cheong Thiam Siew, who helmed real estate firm Knight Frank for almost 60 years. Cecil Wong and Cheong Thiam Siew were close friends. 3 Bishop Dr Wong is married to Lai Foon, and they have two children, Deborah and Jeremy. 4 Dr Chen Chi Nan, a member of Wesley MC, passed away in Vancouver in September 2020. 5 ACS used to be located at Coleman Street, before they moved to Barker Road in September 1950. 1

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

People ¢ A. Susila has been an early childhood educator for more than 30 years, and was one of the recipients of the Early Childhood Development Agency (ECDA) Awards. She received the Outstanding Early Intervention Professional Award, a new award created this year to recognise the important role early intervention professionals play in supporting children with developmental needs. She is a member of Jurong Tamil Methodist Church. / Photo courtesy of A. Susila

Love God

by loving our children Susila: Starting at a new school can be exciting, but it can also be a milestone filled with anxiety and uncertainty. As parents, don’t show your anxiety about their transition to the new school, because your child will be anxious too. Discuss your child’s fears and expectations with them, and reassure them that you will be there for them physically and emotionally, before school and after school. To make the transition easier, start your child’s new school-year sleep routine several weeks before school starts. This will help ensure that your child’s transition to a new school doesn’t include transitioning to a new sleeping schedule at the same time.

ethodist Message (MM): The COVID-19 pandemic has been going on for two years. It has been hard for everyone, but even more so for children who have started going to preschool during the pandemic. How can parents help their children develop normal interpersonal relationships with schoolmates and families even though we are all masked up and social distancing? A. Susila: Socialising with friends is an important and positive part of every child’s life. With the pandemic, there have been many essential safety rules that have been put in place that hinder the preschool children’s interpersonal relationships with their school friends. It is even more challenging for very young children, who need close physical contact—such as through high-fives, hugging, handshakes—to understand the need for social distancing and mask-wearing. However, children are perhaps more adaptable and flexible [than adults] in using new ways of socialising. The use of technology, such as Zoom and other virtual platforms, has made it easier for children to socialise with friends and extended family from a distance. Small uncrowded indoor activities, with fully vaccinated extended family members and friends, are also possible. All that is required is a little imagination and pre-planning. MM: Quite a lot of kids in our Methodist community have just started attending new schools. How can parents help their children adjust to going to a new school, especially if they are starting school for the first time? 10

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

Before the first day of school, take your child on a trial run. Go to the school with them using the route you’ve decided on. This will help make their first day of school less intimidating. The morning of the first day of school can often end up being chaos, especially if you have more than one child to get ready. In order to avoid the morning rush, get everything ready the night before. Planning the night before will allow your child to get plenty of sleep, get out the door on time and not feel any additional anxiety. MM: How can parents help their children who might still experience anxiety at their new school even after a few weeks? Susila: Many pre-schoolers suffer from separation anxiety when it comes to school. To adults, the number of hours a child spends in school might not seem long, but for an anxious child, it feels like an eternity before they can see their parents again. Also, it’s so difficult for a parent to peel their crying child off their leg and head to work like nothing’s wrong. It helps to establish a quick routine for drop off from day one. Don’t linger at school; don’t hold your child in your lap or sit at the table with them. Instead, hug your child at the door and say, “See you soon!” Every minute you prolong the inevitable, the harder you make it for your child to tell you goodbye. A child is MUCH more likely to get upset when a parent leaves if the parent lingers for too long. Let your child know that once you do your special goodbye signal, you’ll head to work, and they’ll head to the classroom to learn and play. Then remind them that you’ll be back to get them

before they know it! If your child cries EVERY morning, have something to divert their attention—such as by distracting their attention to their favourite toys in the classroom—even a few minutes can make a lot of difference. Remind them that at the end of the school day, you’ll be there to pick them up. Tell them that you can’t wait to hear about their day. Please don’t promise a treat after school if they don’t cry, or threaten not to come back to pick them up if they cry. Be sure they get a good night’s sleep every night, so they are well-rested and there is one less reason for them to cry when they get to school. MM: Congratulations on receiving the Outstanding Early Intervention Professional Award! What are early intervention professionals, and what are some of the developmental needs of the children that you work with? Susila: An early intervention professional works alongside paediatricians, therapists and other professionals to support children with special academic, social and behavioural needs, as well as their families. Their role includes assessing the child’s development and inquiring about contributing factors such as their environment and medical history. They work with parents and teachers to design and implement an Individualised Educational Plan that best fits the child’s needs during the necessary intervention. I work with children between two and six years old who have been diagnosed as falling within the mild to moderate range in any of the following: developmental delays (such as speech delay; global developmental delay; intellectual disabilities), autism spectrum disorder, physical disability, hearing impairment (with prescribed hearing aids only) and visual impairment (with prescribed corrective lenses only). MM: Why did you decide to go into a career that involves childhood education, and how did you come to focus on children with developmental needs? Susila: I started working with Presbyterian Community Services (PCS) Grow & Glow Jurong West Childcare Centre in 1987. I was pleased working with typical children and to integrate the children with special needs in the mainstream settings. This enriching experience working with these children is the only window that has helped me and is still encouraging me to enhance my career to serve them better. As a Senior Resource Teacher, I was empowered to help more children to attain additional aid as early as possible. Unlike their counterparts, children with special needs require special education schemes and related services if they want to realise their full potential. It might be more challenging to work with children with developmental needs, but every child has a unique

developmental trajectory. While some speed through their developmental milestones, others might require additional support to help them realise their potential. My role is to work with both teachers and families to implement necessary interventions to support these children. When your heart is fully invested in a person, you will embrace their potential and capabilities. MM: How would you encourage parents and siblings to deal with strangers who might not understand their children with developmental needs, especially when their kids behave unusually or act up in public? Susila: People will be curious why your child/sibling is not able to self-regulate their behaviour. Not everyone in our community might have come across a family with a child with special needs and may not understand the challenges the family face. They would not always need to know what to say or do. Sometimes, situations can be overwhelming for everyone and it’s okay to ask for help when you need it. MM: What’s your advice to burnt-out parents who might have had to work from home and deal with the circuit breaker, school closures or mandatory quarantine? Susila: It is sometimes stressful for parents to spend time with their children after a long day at work. Take time to talk to your child (e.g. look at family pictures or storybooks) to create stories/sentences through writing/drawing and playing games (e.g. card games, boardgames, computer games). This will enable parents to track their child’s progress or regress. Parents can also work with their child’s teacher to plan their next activity, such as through (e.g. take-home or home-based learning activities). This information can help parents to collaborate with teachers to support their child’s learning more holistically. MM: How does being a Christian help you to be a good educator? Susila: I thank the Lord for having placed me in this “mission field” as an Early Childhood Educator with Presbyterian Community Services (PCS) since 1987. Embracing the organisation’s vision and mission has enabled me to honour and magnify the name of our Lord through the services of PCS (vision) and to meet challenges and needs of the community in Christian witness to touch lives (mission). The Lord has given me two mentors—Ms Kanniga and Ms Gomy—who have always embraced my potential and encouraged me. This journey has enabled me to become a “fruitful tree”, turning inspiration into action and I want to, in turn, inspire many more “fruitful trees” in the EC sector.

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

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Church Life ¢ Christmas 2021 Ashley Ho is the Social Media Executive at MCS Comms. / Photos courtesy of the various Methodist Churches

Spreading the joy of in the heartlands

Christmas

uring the Christmas season last year, Methodist churches were hard at work spreading the Good News of Christ through warm and charitable actions that bought much cheer to their respective communities. We share with you some snippets of the ministries involved in bringing Christ to the heartlands. Ang Mo Kio Methodist Church

Gift @ Christmas Ang Mo Kio Methodist Church (AMKMC) brought Christmas to their neighbourhood with their annual donation drive. Their “Gift @ Christmas” initiative raised funds to provide gifts for families in need, by partnering with senior activity centres and social service agencies in Ang Mo Kio. With the time taken for personal distribution of gift hampers, made possible by generous donations, AMKMC members were reminded AMKMC members preparing to distribute the gifts for the various families in need.

of the numerous ways they could give!

Ang Mo Kio Tamil Methodist Church

Joy Drive Ang Mo Kio Tamil Methodist Church’s (AMKTMC) Christmas celebrations kicked off with the “Joy Drive”, which saw volunteers distributing food packets to migrant workers and their roommates across more than 20 locations. It culminated in an online event in the evening themed “The light that dispelled the darkness”, where many came

together

spread

the

festive

cheer.

Youths from AMKTMC performed a play, while other youth volunteers conducted an online interactive game segment, in response to AMKTMC’s call for volunteers earlier this year. Pastor-in-charge Rev R. Prabhu delivered the Christmas message, reminding all who were present of the reason for the season.

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

AMKTMC youths got together to perform a short play

Making the 2021 Christmas a even special occasion for the children

Aldersgate Methodist Church

Toysforyou With the goal of making Christmas even more meaningful created

the

children,

“Toysforyou”,

Aldersgate

Christmas

initiative

that gave children in need a chance to select their own toys for the holidays. The team even went the extra mile to decorate the collection space in the church to resemble a toy store in order to complete the entire experience for the beneficiaries!

Cairnhill Methodist Church

Bless a Gift Project Cairnhill MC’s “Bless a Gift Project” continues for another year, with the help of parents, kids, and their faithful Children Ministry! In partnership with the children’s homes of Gracehaven, Sunbeam Place and The Haven, Cairnhill Methodist Church has granted the wishes of 105 children and youths, who

Volunteers at work bearing gifts for the youths

had been asked to write down their names and wishes for presents. Participating Cairnhill MC families were then assigned a child to pray for, and to buy them a gift with an accompanying card.

Paya Lebar Methodist Church

Engaging the old and young! Paya Lebar MC has gone the extra mile to make Christmas 2021 an event to remember at St Luke’s ElderCare and Hope Student Care Centre. The volunteer team dedicated the time to prepare engaging programmes and gifts for their elderly and children that will go a long way in having their lives touched and impacted by God during their time at the centre.

Distances between the volunteers and beneficiaries were shortened thorugh the use of Zoom

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

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Spreading the joy of Christmas in the heartlands

Volunteers arriving at Rainbow Centre bearing presents

Faith Methodist Church

Spreading cheer at Rainbow Centre Christmas 2021 saw Faith MC partnering with Rainbow Centre to bless their beneficiaries. The collaboration, led by Peh Oon Thian, Faith MC’s Senior Pastoral Team Member for Small Groups, Seniors, and the Mandarin Ministry, witnessed the committee distributing gifts to the Centre’s students as well as engaging them. We hope that many at the children at the Centre felt the love of God through this programme!

Pentecost Methodist Church

PENTEC

Seeking treasures in the community

OST MET HODIS

Treasure Bo T CHURC H

PRESEN

x II

Pentecost MC took a proactive approach to bring the light of Christ to the communities around the church. The church was eager to repeat the success of their “Treasure Box” movement that was started in 2020 when members actively sought out migrant workers during the Christmas season to minster to them. Thus, Pentecost MC initiated “Treasure Box II” during last year’s Christmas in an effort to minister to their surrounding residential communities as well as those within the church itself through activities such as hosting meals at homes or outside or simply getting unreached individuals out on day trips.

Pentecost MC placed great importance in seeking out the unreached living around them through the annual Treasure Box event

Toa Payoh Methodist Church

Have a meal on us programme Toa Payoh Methodist Church’s (TPMC) wrapped up yet another “Have A Meal On Us” (HAMOU) initiative during Christmas 2021 which was reported in the January 2022 issue of Methodist Message. Having sponsored thousands of meals from hawkers and eateries in their neighbourhood, TPMC has blessed stall owners whose businesses were hit hard by the pandemic, along with Toa Payoh residents in need of a meal and a helping hand. Earlier in 2021, the news of a COVID-19 cluster at Toa Payoh Bus Interchange also spurred on TPMC to extend HAMOU for bus captains, staff and stall owners of the interchange. This would not have been possible without the warm-hearted generosity of TPMC worshippers, who through Christ, gave beyond their targeted amount! Blessing the bus captains at Toa Payoh Interchange

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

Opinion ¢ Ps Ian Wong is the Youth & Young Adult Pastor at Kum Yan Methodist Church, where he’s been serving full time for the last 19 years. He and his wife Eeleen have been married for 11 years, and they are parents to four wonderful daughters aged one to nine. He is passionate about music and worship, and loves building community, investing in relationships and seeing people grow in freedom and purposeful living. / Photo courtesy of Ps Ian Wong

Three ways to have a better Lunar New Year

To the Chinese brothers and sisters in our Methodist Family, blessed Lunar New Year!

ood is often at the centre of our celebrations,

Usually, no one knows how these things became the

and many of us know the value of food

norm. But what if these “default practices” were up

hospitality. We will go to great lengths to make

for us to change? What if all it took was for someone

sure our guests and family members are well-fed,

to be more intentional?

and take great delight in their enjoyment of what we have prepared! In many families, food can even

We can be the one to suggest new things that

be considered a primary love language, sometimes

promote interaction. Play Heads Up! (a mobile-

even helping us “say” what we find hard to convey

device-based charades game) with them! Bring

in words.

a board/card game (like Sequence, Singaporean Dream or even UNO!) that can bring generations

As we prepare our homes for the coming family

together. Pull some family members to help out in

celebrations, it may be good to also ask the Father

the kitchen and peel oranges for everyone. Take a

what else He might want us to do to be bless our

walk to the neighbourhood store with the kids to buy

loved ones. Here are three ideas.

ice creams or go to the playground.

1. Better culture

Be that Uncle or Aunt they remember as the “generous

The culture of our families is made up of all our values and practices. I have heard many young people complain about how boring visitations can be. After eating all the snacks and getting their angpaos, they

one”, who really cared about them. Perhaps what you do this year will contribute to the new culture your extended family is going to have for years to come!

find themselves just staring at their phones until the

2. Better conversations

visit is over. Other times, the TV is on, and everyone is

One of the most important elements of our family

half-watching a holiday movie or some grand variety

culture is how we talk to one another. A good

show. Still others may be playing something, be it

conversation is a combination of good listening and

mahjong or a PS5. How many of us still have separate

thoughtful responses, and it is how we engage and

“adults” and “kids” tables?

value people.

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

| 15

Three ways to have a better Lunar New Year

I was once asked, “So when is it your turn?” in

While all this can be fun and informative, they rarely

reference to a relative who got married that year. I

help us to show care, or know one another better.

must have been in my late twenties or early thirties

Can we listen better and be more thoughtful in our

then, and had spent the last season learning to be

responses? Here are some pointers that may help.

happily and healthily single. While the question was not asked with malice, I must admit I was not amused. I cheekily wondered what would happen if I asked that older relative the same question the next time we met at a funeral. Funny (and inappropriate) as that thought was, I am keenly aware that good conversations do not happen by accident. Casual conversations that do not start with sensitivity and tact can often begin with careless observations about a person’s weight, grooming, dressing, singleness or presenting energy level for the day. Though well-meaning, these statements can

A. It is up to us to make a difference if we seize it I am old enough to know you may not see everyone again next year. Some might drift away, others may move away and still others may pass away. We will never regret making the most of every opportunity to be wise (Eph 5:15–16), to show love, and build that deeper connection with our loved ones.

B. Move from information to knowing

be jarring, even hurtful. We certainly can hope for

Start with specific questions about something

better.

someone does (job, CCA, course of study) and more towards why (Interest? Passion?

I have also noticed many conversations revolve around

Obligation?) and how they are experiencing

our complaints (“wah the restrictions nowadays ah”)

it (Fun? Tedious?). These are breadcrumbs for

and our fantastic or funny stories (“wah do you know

us to follow, with the goal of finding out not

what I saw that day?”). We might even unknowingly

what this person does, but who this person is.

retell the same stories year after year.

C. Beware of conversation stoppers To the younger ones Do not be afraid to engage an older person! You would be surprised how willing they are to find out more about you! Be a master at asking good questions that let them talk about their areas of expertise, and ask follow up questions to ask them to explain even technical or complicated things in layman’s language. Don’t forget one of the most powerful tools you have, which is to ask, “When you were my age, did you ever…?” Be bold to ask them questions not only about what they did, but what they learnt from those experiences.

To the older ones Most young people are open to talking to older people. What they dread is to be made a captive audience of your stories or a student of your lectures. Because our culture tends to

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

defer to age, it takes double the effort and self-awareness for older people not to jump in with their opinions, or stories, or make general statements about younger people. If you can really listen, make a young person feel what they say matters and ask them insightful questions about what they share, chances are you might even learn something—or better, be given the privilege to hear the heart of this precious young person.

D. Aim for a genuine heart connection It is amazing what a little vulnerability can do to spark a deeper conversation. We share not only our victories, but also struggles, and give others permission to be real too. Our hearts can really connect, and we can show care, and even pray for one another. I have personally seen how good conversations that can “add up” even if we are meeting only once a year. Our intentionality, openness to the Spirit’s leading and skill in conversations can even result in a life changed (Jn 4). So, let’s get ready for better conversations!

Ps Ian Wong, his

wife Eeleen, an

d their four beau

tiful daughters

Maybe one other way we can make Lunar New Year better is to make it better for someone else. Someone who is painfully aware that—this year, this season, this holiday—is not one they particularly feel like celebrating. For them, a text, a phone call or a visit can help us become the blessing that God wants

3. Better channels of God’s love

to bring them.

Some of you who have read thus far might be

As believers, our mandate goes beyond comfort and

wondering: “My family is broken. We are not even on

celebration, and certainly beyond Lunar New Year.

talking terms. How can we aim for anything like this?”

For some of us, meeting cousins outside of family

Maybe these holidays are actually the hardest days

gatherings will be a big step. For others, being a

of the year, and a constant reminder of the hole in

peacemaker, or an intercessor for your family might

your hearts. I have talked to people who are from the

be the hardest thing, but the most needed thing.

“black sheep” of the family, shunned and not invited to any family gatherings. I have seen conflicts over

In this year, my own extended family experienced

money or careless words and actions last for decades.

both the devastation of a lost loved one, as well as the tear-filled reunion of relatives who have

I am reminded in these moments, that our Heavenly

not seen each other for decades. As the blaring

Father is close to the broken-hearted (Ps 34:18). He is

speakers at our supermarkets welcome the arrival

one who is the Father to the fatherless, and the one

of the god of wealth, may we play our part in

who sets the lonely in families (Ps 68:5–6). He is also

welcoming the God who still does miracles, still

the God of all comfort (2 Cor 1:3–4), and the comfort

heals relationships and brings both comfort and

we receive from Him in all our troubles can also be

celebration into our homes this year.

used to comfort others.

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

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Opinion ¢ Christina Wong is the Managing Editor of Thir.st, a local digital platform calling the next generation to step out in bold faith. The article was first published on Thir.st and reproduced with permission. / Photo courtesy of Christina Wong Presenting HAMOU vouchers to SBS TransitLink

A time for meaningful

conversations

unar New Year, in the recent few years, has become

I lived with regret for the months that followed.

a season of poignant reflection for me.

I replayed the last time I saw her over and over in my head. I regretted just sitting silently in one corner

It was during Lunar New Year that I saw my grandmother

during that visit. I regretted the many times my dad

and grandfather for the last time, in 2011 and 2014,

invited me along to visit her, and I turned him down.

respectively.

I regretted not being really present even though I was physically present.

In my grandmother’s final years, she was really sick. My dad constantly nagged at me to visit her, but I chose

You’d think that I probably would’ve learnt my lesson, but

not to do so for selfish reasons (I can’t communicate

sadly not. In Lunar New Year 2014, I saw my grandfather

with her in her dialect anyway, We are not close

for the last time.

anyway, I am very busy preparing for exams anyway). Two months after I last saw her on Lunar New Year,

The second day of Lunar New Year also happens to fall

2011, she passed away from complications after a limb

on his birthday on the Lunar Calendar, and on that day

amputation procedure.

each year we used to cook up a feast to honour him.

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

It is a day we used to put aside our differences and

And had I known that it would be the last time I’ll ever

intolerance towards each other, and sit down at the same

see my grandfather, I would’ve sat with him or gone on a

table together, as one big family. In a family like mine

walk with him. I would’ve asked him why he loved taking

with its strained relations, this was an occasion to be

walks so much. I would’ve put in effort to have some

treasured.

meaningful conversations with him.

The tradition went with my grandfather.

It’s time to reclaim the significance of the season Instead of heading to visitations begrudgingly, and giving

Nobody saw it coming. My late grandfather was always

curt single-word answers to the unavoidable questions

in the pink of health, and looked younger than his actual

from our relatives, what if we took the effort to make

age of 81. After my grandmother passed away, we all

the season more meaningful for our families, or at least

said we’d visit him more often, but months passed and

for ourselves?

we didn’t. Everyone was all too busy with our own lives. He was always healthy and independent, apart from

Look around you. That cousin who is younger than you?

his poor hearing, and that gave us an extra false sense

You can probably give some advice on his studies. That

of assurance.

aunt who was recently widowed? You can ask her how she’s been doing. That high-flying cousin who seems to

Then one night he was admitted to the hospital with a

have it all? You can ask her how she really feels about all

high fever, and within the next 12 hours his condition

these glittering accomplishments. That uncle who got

deteriorated precipitously. And then he was gone forever.

divorced? You can be his listening ear.

The regret I felt was all too familiar.

In the Old Testament times, priests were chosen to

It’s time for meaningful conversations

represent people before God and they were the only ones who could enter the presence of God. Now, we

I think most of us can identify with the feeling of sitting

are called to be a royal priesthood that is set apart (1

around quietly on a family visit, staring at our phones

Pet 2:9) for God. We are all priests of God in our own

for a few hours to shield ourselves from awkward

ways. So, as mediators between God and pre-believers,

conversations with relatives whom we don’t actually

how can we represent God to the people around us this

recognise.

Lunar New Year?

We head off to relatives’ houses with the expectation

Not everyone will appreciate our efforts to have

that it’s going to be really boring and they’re just going

meaningful conversations, but it’ll at least help to make

to ask the same old questions again. We pay no attention

this season more bearable, more purposeful. We can turn

to what’s going on around us, and make no effort to have

this annual snoozefest into an opportunity where we can

conversations that are actually meaningful.

minister to people we rarely get to meet.

We start to see Lunar New Year as a season of dreary

It’s time to wake up. It’s time for some meaningful

family obligations to fulfil. This is especially sad for a

conversations—before it’s too late.

season of joy that’s meant to bring families together. You may only see this auntie or that cousin once a year on Lunar New Year. But how would you know if you’ll ever see them again? Had I known that it would be the last time I’d ever see my grandmother, I would’ve made an effort to have at least one meaningful conversation with her. I would’ve at least found out more about her—why she came to Singapore as a single mother, how she brought up my aunt on her own, what her dreams were as a young woman, how she met my grandfather… There were so many things I did not know about the matriarch of the family. METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

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METHODIST MESSAGE, JULY 2013

Opinion ¢ Adapted from an article from CAC News, first published in 2006

Lunar New Year:

A Christian perspective

he Lunar New Year is the most important point on the Lunar calendar. The beginning of the lunar year has symbolised the act of starting over with renewed hopes for happiness and prosperity. It is also a time to renew ties with family and friends, through family reunion dinners and social visits.

Chinese and many other Asian Christians continue to celebrate the New Year so as to maintain their ethnic identity. But while the celebration was traditionally marked by a religious ceremony in honour of Heaven and Earth, the household gods and ancestors, Chinese Christians will celebrate the event from the perspective of their faith in Christ. Christian interpretations have been given to many of the traditional symbols associated with Lunar New Year:

House-cleaning: It is a good time for Christians to evaluate their lives in light of their commitment to Christ. Spring couplets: The traditional practice of displaying couplets or pairs of auspicious characters at the doorways is reintroduced among Christians by putting up Christian messages.

New clothes: This can be an opportunity for giving thanks for God’s abundant provisions (Rom 5:17). Feasting: While over-indulging these few days, remember that our body is the “temple of the Holy Spirit”, so do not abuse it. Also remember the Christian virtue of hospitality, especially for those less fortunate.

Oranges: Oranges are exchanged as a blessing for prosperity, because the Cantonese word for “orange” sounds like gold. Christians are reminded that gold also symbolises a genuine faith (1 Pet 1:7). Angpaos: As gifts are given both to those below and above us in status, it is good to remember those who have served us faithfully, and also the Lord, to whom ultimate respect is due (Ex 20:3).

Ancestors: While Chinese Christians will worship the one true God rather than their ancestors, that hardly means that they dishonour or neglect their family ancestors or even the ancestors of the faith. Scripture clearly calls us to respect those who came before us, and to honour our parents (Ex 20:12).

L U N A R N E W Y E A R P R AY E R Almighty God, We thank You for the Lunar New Year celebrations. The annual family gatherings help us cement our family ties. We thank You for our family ancestors and spiritual ancestors. Father, give us the boldness to witness to our family and friends as we meet them during this festive season. O God, help us to obey You in thoughts and in deeds, that we may please You in all our ways. In the name of our Lord and Saviour Jesus, Amen. METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

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Reach Out ¢ Welfare Services By the Methodist Welfare Services (MWS) Communications Team / Photos and visuals courtesy of MWS

LENT : Amidst a raging pandemic, will you step out of the boat?

atalie* was 11 years old when she lost her dad in 2014. Reeling from the pain of her loss, she fell into a dark place of grief and loneliness. “I was

very close to my dad and when he passed away, I found myself all alone,” confided Natalie. But the reality that he was no longer around began to sink in only when Natalie entered secondary school. She soon fell into bad company, played truant and lost interest in studying. Her relationship with her family also deteriorated. “We hardly spoke and I stayed away from home a lot. Eventually, when I was 15, I was referred to MWS Girls’ Residence,” Natalie recalled.

24-HR HOTLINES PAUL & DANIEL

+65 8321 3355 TOLL-FREE

1800-777-2422 “Serving families for a decade and more...”

www.AmazingGraceFunerals.com

Amazing Grace has prepared these few measures to allow families to have a meaningful and dignified farewell for their loved ones: A. Online Ticketing

Complimentary online ticketing system to allow visitors to reserve a visiting time slot and plan their visits, allowing families to keep within the regulated maximum number of persons at any one time with minimal coordination.

B. Online Memorial

allows friends to find updated information and offer their sympathies to bereaved families

C. Live Streaming

this option is available to enable friends and families to participate in the wake/vigil and funeral services online

D. Donations

families may appoint a PayNow account of a family member to receive donations. This will be posted on the online memorial.

Christian Funeral Packages • International Repatriation • Pre-Planning Seminars

It took some time for Natalie to settle in and even then, she could not talk about her dad without breaking down. MWS social worker Subhashini Kunasagar patiently journeyed with Natalie and taught her to manage her emotions and grief. “Over time, I learnt to regulate myself whenever I felt like I was experiencing anxiety. In the midst of this, I had to manage the stress of preparing for my N-Level examinations. But the staff at the Residence created a safe environment for me, listened to me and made me feel supported,” shared Natalie. Besides working with Natalie, MWS also worked with her family on how they relate to her. Gradually, Natalie’s family began to better understand what was really going

24-HR HOTLINES

on within her and changed how they

+65 8321 3355

communicate with her. “I was pleasantly surprised when my family shared that they feel very “Serving proud of me. Iforalso appreciate families a decade and more...” how they would, without fail, turn up each

PAUL & DANIEL TOLL-FREE

1800-777-2422 www.AmazingGraceFunerals.com

O nly one life, a few brief years,

time for the joint meeting sessions at the

Each with its burdens, hopes, and fears; Each with its days, I must fulﬁll, past so all these made me really happy andor in His will; The Giving Methodist (TGM) takes place each living for self year to galvanise Methodists to show acts of kindness accepted,” said Natalie. Only one life, ‘twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ willlove last.to those in need. This year, amidst a raging and Residence. We never used to talk in the

- C.T. Studd

These days, Natalie will spend time with her

pandemic, let us take courage, step out and uplift those

family whenever she goes on home-leave, a

who need help to ride out this storm.

time of bonding she really cherishes. With the guidance of MWS and her family’s unwavering support, Natalie’s perseverance finally paid off. Today, she is working as

You

can

get

involved

Giving

Time

through

volunteering with MWS or a Methodist Church’s social concerns ministry, Giving A Donation, or Giving Voice to the disadvantaged and distressed by spreading

nlyaspires one life,toa few brief years, a healthcare professional and

theand word Each with its burdens, hopes, fears;about this campaign. Find out more on Each with its days, I must fulﬁll, thegivingmethodist.sg. For enquiries, please contact more individuals like Natalie wholiving need for our self or in His will; . support as they soldier on to findOnly light one at life, ‘twill soontgm@mws.sg be past, the end of the tunnel. Will you step Only out ofwhat’s done for Christ will last. - C.T. Studd TGM is spearheaded by The Methodist Church in the boat to show someone that support? be a nurse one day. But there are many

Singapore and Methodist Welfare Services.

*Not her real name

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

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Reach Out ¢ Missions Dr Christopher Cheah is an Exco member of the Methodist Missions Society (MMS) and the Chairman of the MMS 30th Anniversary Taskforce. / Photos courtesy of MMS

MMS

30th Anniversary Thanksgiving Service

he Methodist Missions Society (MMS) was established on 30 Sept 1991 as the missions agency of The Methodist Church in Singapore (MCS). MMS’s 30th Anniversary last year served as an

occasion for us to reflect on God’s faithfulness and blessings over the past three decades. It was also a call for us to focus on His Spirit at work among us today and provided an opportunity to look to Him to lead and direct us in the years to come. As part of MMS’s 30th Anniversary Celebration, a Thanksgiving Service was held at Faith Methodist Church on the first Sunday in Advent, 28 Nov 2021, to celebrate God’s faithfulness over the past 30 years. MMS Executive Director Rev Derrick Lau and Field Director Col (Ret) Quek Koh Eng warmly welcomed about 100 guests who gathered on site and another 100 online. Their welcome was followed by

Col (Ret) Quek and Rev Derrick Lau welcoming the guests

We were blessed by Awaken Generation’s spirit-led Praise and Worship

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

the talented Awaken Generation team ushering everyone into God’s presence with their melodious voices and Spirit-led worship.

Bishop Dr Gordon Wong delivering his impactful message to serve silently

MMS celebrating God’s faithfulness

The Presidents and representatives of the three MCS

national pastors, and leaders on the field. In addition,

Annual Conferences then led congregrants in the

there were almost 500 online views after the service.

Litany of Mission and Prayers of Thanksgiving for God’s goodness and faithfulness to MMS over the years. After

My deepest appreciation goes to all our speakers,

MMS Chairman Mr Alvin Tan read the Scripture passage

distinguished

from Matthew 9:31–38, Bishop Dr Gordon Wong, with his

intercessors, past and present MMS Executive Committee

usual eloquence and yet down-to-earth manner, gave an

and

inspiring sermon entitled “Spreading the News?” Bishop

friends, and family for joining us on the momentous

Wong spoke about how we need to learn to spread the

occasion. My heartfelt gratitude also goes to the MMS

Good News of the Gospel “silently” as taught by our Lord

Team and the Organising Team led by Grace Chung—

Jesus, without losing its impact and importance.

they worked tirelessly yet joyfully to put together a

guests,

Sub-Committee

pastors, Members,

leaders, staff,

volunteers, missionaries,

meaningful and memorable Thanksgiving Service. To We were moved by the video about the Little Candles

God be the glory!

Methodist School in Thailand as we saw how the teachers, despite limited resources, managed to touch the lives of the many children there. In his address, Rev Lau used the video and other examples to relate how MMS has impacted many lives in Cambodia, East Asia, Laos, Nepal, Thailand, Timor-Leste and Vietnam. He gave glory and honour to God for mobilising our local Methodist churches to pray, give and send missionaries and volunteers to these peoples and nations. Rev Lau encouraged all to continue to partner MMS in the years to come. Before the offering was taken, the Pastor-in-Charge of

Rev Reuben Ng leading the Responsive Call to Worship

Faith Methodist Church, Rev Reuben Ng, encouraged us to give generously to the Little Candles Methodist School project and the MMS General Fund. Daniel and Peixin from Grace Methodist Church rendered a special anthem in music and song during the offering time. At the close of the service, Bishop Wong gave the Benediction. COVID-19 restrictions may have limited the number of people allowed to celebrate on site at Faith Methodist Church, but they did not stop the many who participated online, including the President of The Methodist Church in Cambodia, Rev Lun Sophy, and many missionaries,

Dr Christopher Cheah giving thanks and acknowledging the love and support of everyone for the past 30 years METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

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Relationships ¢ You & your family Benny Bong has been a family and marital therapist for more than 30 years, and is a certified work-life consultant. He was the first recipient of the AWARE Hero Award, received in 2011, and is a member of Kampong Kapor Methodist Church.

Hope A

recent invitation to be a panel speaker in a webinar on “hope” led me to mull over this multi-faceted subject. Here, I shall consider the importance of hope in relationships that matter to us.

relationships, does not happen overnight . Hope then is vital to sustain the change process. As we cling on to hope, we are willing to make sacrifices now for future gain.

Before going on, allow me to define hope as a feeling of expectation, a desire with an anticipation that something better is possible. As I see it, three elements must exist for hope to be present.

What can get in the way of hope? One reason may be past experiences of repeated failures, disappointments or criticism. A mother I spoke to kept repeating: “I am not a good mother. I have failed my children.” So fixated was she on this that she felt incapable of working at a better relationship with her children and unworthy of getting another chance at all.

Firstly, there must be dissatisfaction with one’s current state as well as a desire for and a vision of a better state of affairs. Thus, if one has a strained relationship with another but is not bothered by it, there will be no desire to try to improve things. The second element is the possibility for things to change. For instance, a broken relationship may be impossible to repair because all contact with the other party has been lost or that individual is deceased. There is then no hope for improvement. The third element is one’s ability to attempt to effect some change. When a break in a relationship occurs, change is likely if there is awareness of what can be done to make amends, or if some common interest can serve as a reason for reconciliation. In working with family members in conflict with each other, I sometimes look for a common glue that may bring together the fractious parties. It could be a mutual concern to care for an ailing parent or a forgotten shared felt history of hard times they went through together. When these three elements exist , hope then becomes a spark for change. Although it often does not in itself lead to change, hope can ignite the change process. Change, especially in the context of troubled

METHODIST MESSAGE February 2022

Another obstacle may stem from a perceived lack of attributes or abilities to start or sustain the effort of change. However, it is not so much about having all the competencies and qualifications to begin with but about willingness to work on attaining them. After all, hope focuses not on the past but the future; not only on what has been or what is but what can be. As believers, we can hold fast to the hope that God loves us and will not give up on us despite our unworthiness. We have hope not because of who we are and what we have but because of Who He is, and He is more than capable to do all that He wants to see in us. He is able and willing to help us surmount our present difficulties, the COVID -19 pandemic included. As COVID -19 takes away things we are familiar with and we once thought were essential, we begin to appreciate the things that matter. One of these is our connection with others and the relationships that count . May we stand firm on the hope that our cherished relationships will weather the storms and stresses of this time.

Hymns & Songs ¢ Justin Chan is a Programme Executive at Methodist School of Music, Worship & Worship Department. As a reformed rock musician, he believes hymns and heavy metal can co-exist for the glory of God.

The Blessing B

y the time this is published, Lunar New Year celebrations would be over, and some of us who do participate in it will be in “recovery mode”, fresh from the hectic festivities of shuttling to and from our extended families’ homes. Some families are very strict about their traditions: the order in which you greet the elders, their honorifics (and there are numerous!), who should be in attendance at which evening meal during the 15 days, amongst many others. Why this fixation on tradition? In part, the family is a vehicle through which identity is preserved. Our Christian brothers from the Orthodox tradition will go so far as to say that family is the “little church” through which the sacramental realities are passed on to the next generation. A clear example of this is the Seder Meal, celebrated at the Passover by Jewish families (including Messianic Jews), which includes participation from both parents and children. An excerpt of the liturgy is as follows, where the youngest child is assigned to ask questions. Child: Why is this night different from all other nights? Parent: Because we were once slaves of Pharaoh in Egypt, but the Lord brought us out with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm. Child: On this night, why do we eat only unleavened bread? Parent: Biblical tradition says that the people had to leave Egypt so quickly that they did not have time to let the bread rise. So they made dough without yeast. While there are difficulties finding complete analogues in our Methodist tradition, it doesn’t stop us from establishing simple patterns of worship in our family life. Setting aside a short time for a simple song, reading the Bible together and prayer need not be a scholarly or clerical enterprise. One such song that captures the spirit of family worship is Elevation Worship’s “The Blessing”, based on the Aaronic Blessing of Numbers 6:24–26. The songwriters have envisioned this song to be sung declaratively as an affirmation of biblical truth: that God will bless us, keep us, show favour towards us and grant us grace and peace for a thousand generations as His children. There is a prayerful appeal that we will become more sensitive to God’s presence that exists everywhere, including the Holy Spirit indwelling within us, and that we will understand God is for us no matter the time of day, location or personal scenario. If there is discomfort as to the song’s directionality (e.g. is it the worship leader blessing the congregation?), the songwriters have stated that the lyrics stem from the heart of Scripture and should be understood as God blessing us as we sing to one another. Just as Lunar New Year traditions reinforce my identity as an ethnic Chinese, the disciplined patterns of worship, prayer and reflection as people living in the presence of God help reinforce my family’s identity as children of God. Indeed, as we establish worshipful identities, may God’s favour be upon us, as the song says, “for a thousand generations”.

The Methodist School of Music (MSM) equips and edifies both the individual and the church through music and the performing arts. Find out more at msmusic.edu.sg.

The Blessing The Lord bless you and keep you, make his face shine upon you, and be gracious to you The Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace Amen, amen, amen May his favor be upon you and a thousand generations And your family and your children, and their children, and their children May his presence go before you and behind you and beside you all around you And within you, He is with you, He is with you In the morning, in the evening, in your coming and your going In your weeping and rejoicing, He is for you, He is for you We are the hope on earth

CCLI Song # 7147007 Chris Brown | Cody Carnes | Kari Jobe | Steven Furtick © 2020 Capitol CMG Paragon (Admin. by Capitol CMG Publishing) Kari Jobe Carnes Music (Admin. by Capitol CMG Publishing) Worship Together Music (Admin. by Capitol CMG Publishing) Writer’s Roof Publishing (Admin. by Capitol CMG Publishing) Music by Elevation Worship Publishing (Admin. by Essential Music Publishing LLC)

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Opinion ¢ Soundings Dr Roland Chia is Chew Hock Hin Professor of Christian Doctrine at Trinity Theological College and Theological and Research Advisor at the Ethos Institute for Public Christianity (http://ethosinstitute.sg).

On saving the family “Soundings” is a series of essays that, like the waves of a sonogram, explore issues in society, culture and the church in light of the Gospel and Christian understanding.

ne of the most worrying developments that we witness in the West and also in some affluent countries in Asia is the evolution of marriage

and the family. There is a notable decline in the traditional family, even as avant garde arrangements emerge and rise in prevalence. One of these trends is the exponential rise in the number of single-parent families. A 2019 Pew Research Centre study showed that “almost a quarter of U.S. children under the age of 18 live with one parent and no other adults (23%)”. 1

Another development is the rise in the number of

The ease with which the marital union can be dissolved

couples who choose cohabitation over marriage. In

in modern society has also contributed to the erosion

2005, the U.S. Census Bureau reported 4.85 million

of the institution of marriage, which in turn will have

cohabiting couples, an increase of a whopping 1,000

adverse consequences for the family. Legislations that

percent from 1960!

make divorce swift and easy such as no-fault divorce

(known also as no-reason and amicable divorce) are In

some

countries,

the

legalisation

same-sex

marriage and the practice of no-fault divorce have also

examples of how the law can shape public attitudes towards marriage and the family.

contributed to the erosion of the traditional family. Other contributing factors include certain laws on adoption

The role of Christian families in a society where

(such as adoption by singles or by homosexuals),

this important institution is crumbling cannot be

surrogacy, abortion and social egg freezing.

exaggerated. As salt of the earth and light of the world, the Christian family can truly be counter-cultural by

These

trends

are

worrying

because

they

are

disassembling one of the most important institutions in

displaying the beauty of marriage and family as God had intended it.

human society and culture. But in order to do this, Christian marriages and families From time immemorial the traditional family is the

must resist the cultural trends that are sweeping

bedrock of society, the basic cell of human community.

societies across the world. They must conform to the

This important truth is eloquently articulated in the

pattern that is ordained by God (Gen 1 and 2). Each

Apostolic Exhortation of the late Pope John Paul II on

of its members must embrace his or her respective

the role of the Christian family in the modern world

obligations and responsibilities, as a husband and a

(Familiaris Consortio):

wife (e.g. Eph 5:25–33) and a parent and a child (e.g.

The family has vital and organic links with society, since it is its foundation and nourishes it continually through its role of service to life: it is from the family that citizens come to birth and it is within the family that they find the first school of the social virtues that are the animating principles of the existence and development of society itself. 3 For the Christian, the family is not a malleable manmade arrangement that can be altered according to the dictates of the prevailing culture. The family was instituted by God, created by him for the benefit of human beings and the flourishing of society.

Eph 6:1–4). Ideally, all the members of the family should be committed to Christ and to his service. It is in this vein that the Orthodox Church has delightfully portrayed the Christian family as a “small church”, all of whose members are living according to God’s will and for his glory. The Christian family therefore participates in the mission of the Church in proclaiming the Good News of Jesus Christ and in displaying the beauty of God’s plan for humankind. It does this in the hope that it may prevent modern society and culture from becoming the tragic victim of the very perversions it has created.

The basic biblical family unit comprises a man and a woman—united in the sacred covenant of marriage— and their offspring or adopted children. The extended family includes relatives by blood or marriage such as grandparents, nephews, nieces, cousins, aunts and uncles. Marriage is the foundation of the family. The modern or postmodern dismantling of the traditional family often begins with the dissolution of the institution of marriage as a union between one man and one woman—an obvious example being same-sex marriage.

https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2019/12/12/u-schildren-more-likely-than-children-in-other-countries-to-live-withjust-one-parent.

2 Social Science, LibreTexts, “12.4A: The Decline of the Traditional Family”, https://socialsci.libretexts.org/Bookshelves/Sociology/ Introduction_to_Sociology/Book%3A_Sociology_(Boundless)/12%3A_ Family/12.04%3A_Recent_Changes_in_Family_Structure/12.4A%3A_ The_Decline_of_the_Traditional_Family.

Pope John Paul II, Apostolic Exhortation Familiaris Consortio (November 22, 1981), https://www.vatican.va/content/john-paulii/en/apost_exhortations/documents/hf_jp-ii_exh_19811122_ familiaris-consortio html.

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THINK ¢ Sheri Goh is the Editor of Methodist Message.

Confessions

of a LNY Scrooge

used to call myself the Scrooge of the Lunar New

angpows to children I barely knew, much against the

Year. The Lunar New Year was, to me, an introvert’s

spirit of “it is more blessed to give than to receive

nightmare—it was too loud, too colourful, too

(Acts 20:35)”.

crowded. There was too much food and so much waste. I “Bah! Humbug!”-ed from the time the festive

My family is not very traditionally Chinese. The

music began playing in malls (usually the day after

traditions of the festival that are linked to good fortune

Christmas) until the 15 days were over.

such as red and gold decorations, and the cleaning and sweeping away of bad luck , as well as the emphasis

Large gatherings with distant relatives I met only

on astrology and the accumulation of wealth, are

once a year stressed me out . When I first got married

accoutrements the Christian side of my family does not

and finances were lean, I resented having to give

believe in. We believe in God, not in luck .

That said, the traditions my family does celebrate during

Another family I miss is my church family. I have come

the Lunar New Year are linked to the idea of reunion.

to realise that the annual church family camp is, in

My mom comes from a large family; she is the eldest

fact, a “church family” camp—with the luxury of more

of eight siblings. My grandparents used to have their

time to spend together as members of the family of

married children and families back for dinner every

God. Worshipping online, having discipleship group

Sunday evening. Even though my grandparents have

meetings and Sunday School on Zoom, have been useful

long passed on, a core group of my mother’s siblings,

stand-ins, but virtual meetings cannot replace face-to-

along with their children and grandchildren, have

face fellowship and heart-to-heart conversations.

continued the tradition by hosting the weekly family dinner—that is, until COVID-19 struck.

There is a saying that we know the value of water only when the well runs dry. Some of us have lost friends

The best part of the Lunar New Year has always been, for

and family over the last two years and were unable

me, the family meal. After our regular Sunday dinners,

to bid farewell to them in person. In June last year,

we usually have to rush off because the next day is a

my father lost his best friend to a brain tumour; he

work or school day. But on the first day of the Lunar

was able to visit only once before his friend passed.

New Year, we can linger as long as we like.

We all probably also have loved ones overseas whom we cannot visit .

We meet at my mom’s family home, the site of those long-ago dinners when my grandparents were

Will life ever return to a pre-pandemic “normal”? I

still around, and take an annual family portrait. It

pray it will, and soon! But there’s no knowing when—

is wonderful to see how the family has added new

or if—that will ever happen. Rather than waiting for

members over the years, even as some have gone to

the day when larger-scale gatherings are allowed, I

glory. My grandparents would be proud.

realise I have to intentionally meet up in small groups with extended family and friends I have not seen in a

COVID-19 has caused me to reflect more on my idea of

while. My hope, for my family—immediate, extended

family. One of the things I miss most, and realise I have

and church—is that we do not wait to realise how

taken for granted, is our weekly family dinner tradition

precious our relationships are, and will do what it

that we have had to put on hold due to government-

takes to show we cherish them.

mandated safe management measures. My cousins, whom I met every Sunday in pre-pandemic days, have had babies whom I have barely seen. Even when we meet in church, we cannot linger to talk and catch up. What I am thankful for, though, is that over the last two years, my husband, two daughters—one of whom is 14 and the other is six—and I have grown much closer. We have had to stay home much more, in close quarters— including serving out a 10 -day quarantine together—so have been forced to be more tolerant and patient with one another. My husband used to travel extensively for work , but has not since January 2020. We have found more activities to do together, such as taking skating lessons as a family, and have discovered parts of Singapore that we had not been to before.

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Poems ¢ Leong Kwok Thye is a member of Kampong Kapor Methodist Church and has been involved in the ministries of Scripture Union, the Bible Study Fellowship and the pastoral care programme of Anglo-Chinese School (Primary) and Anglo-Chinese School (Barker Road).

Seeking God Seek the Lord while he may be found, Call on him when he is near. Let the wicked forsake his way and the evil man his thoughts. Let him turn to the Lord, and he will have mercy on him, and to God for he will freely pardon. Isa 55:6–7 We seek God, he is missing! He has not been hiding, Our evil thoughts and ways, Have shielded us from his face. When we forsake wickedness, To seek him in his holiness. The in mercy he will forgive, And show us how to live. For his thoughts are better, And his ways are higher. He gives blessing abundance, To those who heed his guidance. He makes the rain and snow, Water the plants to grow. Hence when wickedness cease, He will bless us with his peace.

MCS Careers ¢ Join our team

The MCS Communications department is looking for a DIGITAL

MEDIA STRATEGIST



Do you love connecting with people, have lots of creative ideas, and want to help to tell stories of Methodists and Christians in Singapore?

   

Can you plan and create digital content for a wide audience? Are you able to help Methodist Message go digital? Can you create videos and podcasts? Are you familiar with Search Engine Optimisation (SEO)?

Check out details for this job opportunity at https://tinyurl.com/dmsatmcs or scan the QR code >> ABOUT MCS The Methodist Church in Singapore (MCS) is a connectional church comprising the General Conference, three Annual Conferences, local churches, and various agencies and organisations. The General Conference (GC) is the highest body of the MCS, responsible for legislation, policy, and the overseeing of its various agencies, including the programme agencies responsible for education, missions, and welfare services .

www.methodist.org.sg

People ¢ Pastor Jeremy Yap is an Assistant Pastor at Aldersgate Methodist Church.

What does being a Methodist mean to you?

eing a Methodist means I have been adopted and connected to a large and loving family of God.

While I was brought up a Christian, I was not brought up a Methodist. It was after I met my wife that I decided to sink roots in her home church, a Methodist church. When God called me to full time pastoral ministry, the church supported me wholeheartedly and invested in me and in my studies at Trinity Theological College. What struck me about Methodist connectionalism was that the local church supported me knowing that if I applied to the pastoral ministry, it might mean that I would be eventually sent out to serve in the Trinity Annual Conference and that I may not return to serve the local church. It was during this time that I truly understood what it meant to serve the larger body of Christ as The Methodist Church in Singapore. I experienced generosity that gave without asking for anything in return except that I fulfil my calling in the Lord. I am truly blessed by my Methodist family.

Ps Jeremy Yap, his wife Lydia and their three children.

Being Methodist to means to me experience and show to others this radical love of Jesus, to give of our money, time and ourselves without expectation of reciprocity, because we are in a large family of God. I really enjoy the times when local churches come together, be they at our Annual Conferences or at events where we see members of different churches work to serve and reach out together. This Christian unity paints a beautiful picture of the family of God.

February

Looking Ahead ¢

Scan to see events online!

THE GIVING METHODIST 2022: STEP OUT OF THE BOAT Give Donation and Give Voice campaign from Feb to Oct 2022 / Give Time Campaign from 2 Mar to 14 Apr during Lent season thegivingmethodist.sg tgm@mws.sg

Spearheaded by The Methodist Church in Singapore (MCS) and Methodist Welfare Services (MWS), The Giving Methodist takes place each year to galvanise Methodists to show acts of kindness and love to those in need. With the COVID-19 pandemic raging on, let us take courage to step out of our boat and uplift those who need help to ride out this storm. You can join in by “Giving Time” through volunteering with MWS or a Methodist Church’s social concerns ministry, “Giving A Donation”, or “Giving Voice” to the disadvantaged and distressed by spreading the word about this campaign. Stay tuned for more information on The Giving Methodist 2022.

February

Organised by Methodist Welfare Services

COMPANIONS IN CHRIST: SMALL GROUP EXPERIENCE IN SPIRITUAL FORMATION starting 11 Feb 2022 (every Friday over eight months), 7.30 p.m. to 9.30 p.m. Online via Zoom or onsite at Wesley MC subject to prevailing safe management measures. Register at https://wesley.sg/cic. Slots will be on a first-come-first-served basis. For more information, please email Felicia Ong at discipleshipnurture@wesleymc.org $30 per head, inclusive of course materials

CIC is about a small group of people committed to deepening their relationship with God. The sessions will see participants learning about prayer, scripture and discernment, and about keeping a personal journal of their learning and reflections. The small group meets weekly to support one another and share life journeys authentically without fear of being judged.

March

Organised by Wesley Methodist Church Discipleship and Nurture ministry

SING THE WORD 14, 16, 18–19 Mar 2022, 10.30 a.m. to 12 p.m. Onsite at Methodist School of Music premises subject to prevailing safe management measures. Register at https://tinyurl.com/5cm5mffv. Registration closes 11 Mar. $30 per child. Class sizes will be capped at 15. Registration will be on a first-come-first-serve basis

Thinking of how to occupy the kids during the March holidays? Look no further! MSM has planned “Sing the Word”, a chamber singing camp for 10- to 12-year-olds. Spend the March holidays having fun, enjoying music, and learning singing skills all at the same time!

July

Organised by Methodist School of Music

D6 FAMILY CONFERENCE 2022: RECALIBRATE 29 and 30 Jul 2022 (Friday and Saturday), 9.30 a.m. to 3.00 p.m. Online via Zoom. Register at d6family.sg Early bird price at $50 per head (until 13 Jun 2022). Thereafter $60 per head. Registration closes 17 Jul 2022.

Join this year’s line-up of speakers as they share D6 principles, strategies and best practices on generational discipleship and Family Ministry. Embark on a journey where you will learn to identify and establish healthy practices, and to honour God in the way you lead the families in your church. Organised by SOWER Institute for Biblical Discipleship