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It depends on the city. The bigger the city/metro, the more likely I am going to want to live in the city. This answer would vary for me and it would depend on the place.
I live about 45 minutes from the city center, but I seldom go there. I can get most of my business done within 20-30 minutes -- banking, doctor, shopping, etc. It doesn't take long to be way outside of the city and there are semi-rural pockets relatively close in. I live on an acre+ and have only one adjacent neighbor.
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, 615' Elevation, Zone 8b - originally from SF Bay Area
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If I didn't work in a major city I would say the farther the better. We are about 26 minutes from Bellevue, a fairly major city, and 35 to Seattle, on a good traffic day. Everything we need is within 5-6 miles either in our own small city or the two on either side of us. Most importantly, we have low crime, old-growth forests to hike in, several lakes, great schools, and are without the traffic and noise of big box stores or big commercial buildings.
In the city, in a fairly dense neighborhood (10k ppsm+), though preferably not right on a major street with a bunch of nightlife because of the noise at night.
I live about 70 minutes from downtown Seattle and 40 minutes from downtown Tacoma (both without traffic).
I like this set up a lot more than I thought I would. My town of 60k residents (metro area around 300k) has enough to fulfill all my daily needs. Things that I use on a more occasional basis like international airport, dining for specific cuisines, concerts, etc. are an easy drive away. I don’t have to deal with all the daily negatives like the congestion and crowdedness of Seattle and the absurdly expensive housing. We’re also extremely close to the Olympic Peninsula and can get to Olympic National Park in under an hour.
I work fully remote so don’t have to worry about commute or job market.
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