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Bootnotes

11
Surveillance van's interior

Fan of FBI cosplay? Enjoy freaking out your neighbors? Have we got the eBay auction for you

A rather unusual auction on eBay could appeal to aspiring spies and X‑Files fantasists alike.
Shaun Nichols, 21 Jul 2017
50

Volterman 'super wallet': The worst crowdsource video pitch of all time?

Do you need a "smart" wallet with a built in front-facing camera and GPS? Of course you don't. Not even with a built-in Wi-Fi hotspot? Well, enough people do to make a success of an Indiegogo project promising just that.
Andrew Orlowski, 21 Jul 2017

Burglary, robbery, kidnapping and a shoot-out over… a domain name?!

When transfers go really, really wrong, allegedly
21 Comments
21 Jul 06:02
Beavis and Butt-Head

Authorities go hard on coffee maker for stiff Viagra-powered brew

Is that a DIMM in your pocket or have you been at this banned bean again?
32 Comments
21 Jul 05:03
shocked looking policeman

'Coke dealer' called us after his stash was stolen – cops

Sir, what is your occupation? Um, what?
65 Comments
20 Jul 12:37

Breathless F-35 pilots to get oxygen boost via algorithm tweak

'OMG zillion-dollar jet is hackable' conspiracy theories in 3, 2, 1...
69 Comments
20 Jul 08:32

Stop all news – it's time for us plebs to be told about BBC paycheques!

CommentSexism in the Telly Tax, sexism in pay deals... where else, Auntie?
116 Comments
19 Jul 14:50

Disneyland to become wretched hive of scum and villainy

These might be the Star Wars-themed hotel and rides you are looking for
57 Comments
19 Jul 07:14

Jodie Who-ttaker? The Doctor is in

Thirteen? Thirteen? The Doctor Who fans will see you now
365 Comments
17 Jul 13:01

Jesus walks away after 7,000lb pipe van incident

Local cops issue ticket afterwards
91 Comments
17 Jul 11:56

Truck spills slimy load all over Oregon road – drivers slip in eel slick

Korean 'delicacy' cakes cars
51 Comments
14 Jul 09:52

What can you do with adult VR, some bronze gears and a robotic thumb? On a Friday?

Something for the Weekend, Sir?Well, it gets a prosthetic thumbs-up from me
54 Comments
14 Jul 08:37

'Help! I'm stuck in this ATM,' writes poor bloke on a scribbled note

Cops rescue trapped technician
33 Comments
14 Jul 06:06

Top tip for all you insider traders: Don't Google 'insider trading' from your work PC

Bloke accused of fraud may well be the Wolf of LOL Street
21 Comments
14 Jul 05:04

Fake Newspaper steals Reg design to spruik storage upstart

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery (but we haven't checked that with our lawyers)
36 Comments
14 Jul 04:16

Adult toy retailer slapped down for 'RES-ERECTI*N' ad over Easter

Didn't manage to pull it off
146 Comments
12 Jul 12:29

May the excessive force be with you: Chap cuffed after Star Trek v Star Wars row turns bloody

PollSettle this like the illogical humans you are – vote on which is best
206 Comments
07 Jul 23:30
Raspberry, image via Shutterstock

Bonkers call to boycott Raspberry Pi Foundation over 'gay agenda'

This week, in crappy online petition land...
297 Comments
04 Jul 14:25

One thought equivalent to less than a single proton in mass

Reg Standards BureauFraction required to equal one Katie Hopkins column still unknown
102 Comments
04 Jul 12:36

Male escort says he gave up IT to do something more meaningful

Unlike in tech, 'I get to make a small difference to people's lives'
117 Comments
03 Jul 11:33

In touching tribute to Samsung Note 7, fidget spinners burst in flames

Hang on, there's a tech angle in here somewhere... IoT, right?
78 Comments
29 Jun 20:42

The 'DUP' joins El Reg’s illustrious online standards converter

Reg Standards BureauHow much can you find down the back of your sofa?
80 Comments
27 Jun 14:34

Snoop Dogg swerves Glasto, plays Pure Storage gig #keepitreal

'Where all the sexy ladies at?' Snoop asks hall of middle-aged suits
14 Comments
26 Jun 12:06

Men charged with theft of free newspapers

Bundles of future chip wrappers allegedly nabbed from London rail station
123 Comments
26 Jun 08:37

Ex-NASA bod on Gwyneth Paltrow site's 'healing' stickers: 'Wow. What a load of BS'

Paltrow, we have a problem
120 Comments
23 Jun 11:20

Genoans flout terror ban with bumper basil hand baggage policy

Sauce on a plane
33 Comments
22 Jun 16:32

Canadian sniper makes kill shot at distance of 3.5 KILOMETRES

He'd have been aiming higher than the top of London's Shard to hit his mark
182 Comments
22 Jun 15:28

Researchers take the piss with pee-powered liquid energy project

Bill Gates' cistern system uses your personal recharger
32 Comments
21 Jun 07:00

Hotheaded Brussels civil servants issued with cool warning: Leak

Brexit? No, no... it's baking! Put away the booze, biz-suit
75 Comments
19 Jun 12:38

When corporate signage goes BAD

LogoBotchThe Cisco slip of 2010
31 Comments
19 Jun 08:01

AWS launches celebrity-spotting-as-a-service: What a time to be alive

Cloud can now ID 'hundreds of thousands' of athletes, pollies, actors, struggles with oiled butt
31 Comments
13 Jun 02:35

Swedish school pumps up volume to ease toilet trauma

Don't blush, just flush
141 Comments
12 Jun 14:58
Hyperloop One's proposed Northern UK arc

Hyperloop One teases idea of 50-minute London-Edinburgh ride

Reveals candidate European routes, two tunnels under the Med, under under Baltic Sea
194 Comments
07 Jun 06:57
Harvard

Class clowns literally classless: Harvard axes meme-flinging morons

Uni gives kids a lesson they'll never forget after spreading stupidity on Facebook
70 Comments
05 Jun 20:21
Man wrapped in turqouise cable-knit blanket sips from hot drink - is clearly ill. Photo by Shutterstock

Oil and lube firm offers to ease pains of frustrated office workers

Emo Oil targets overheated marketeers and frigid FM specialists alike
16 Comments
05 Jun 12:32
Asus X555LD

Utah fights man's attempt to marry laptop

Foe of same-sex unions seeks to wed machine
113 Comments
02 Jun 22:02
The robot priest in Germany

German robo-pastor preaches the GNU Testament

Bless me father for I have SYNTAX ERROR
32 Comments
31 May 02:40
G-CFOJ Eurocopter EC155 Helicopter Starspeed Ltd. Pic CC SA 2.0 by James (https://www.flickr.com/photos/95512093@N05/)

IBM marketeers rub out chopper after visit from CEO Ginni

Not a good fit. Apparently
61 Comments
30 May 09:37
Ainsworth stormtrooper helmets photo by Gavin Carke

I'll take the sandtrooper in white: Meet the rebel scum making Star Wars armour sets for a living

Star Wars New Hope @ 40Short of £180,000? These guys will sort you out
Woman with "crying with laughter" emoji for a head... photo by Shutterstock

WannaLaugh? Funsters port WannaCrypt to Commodore, Cisco, Nintendo and Tesla

Some folk have Photoshop and too much time on their hands
30 Comments
29 May 08:02
Ewok

The revolution will not be televised: How Lucas modernised audio in film

Star Wars New Hope @ 40Thank God for Jedi (and other words I thought I'd never use)
69 Comments
26 May 09:06
Gary Lineker and Rolf Harris. #walkerswave

Walkers' Crisps pulls backfiring Tweet campaign that paired Gary Lineker and a bunch of nasties

Pranksters game promo to feature sex crims, murderers, terrorists....
42 Comments
25 May 16:21
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