partner angry at requests for art nude photography

Greenville wrote:

golfhov wrote:

barrym1966 wrote:

Hey guys

where do I begin, i feel like my head is going to explode! My partner has gone away for 2 weeks with my little one. So to fill some time I thought I would photograph a few models in the studio. Some requested lingerie shots etc, I requested some models for art-nude shots as its something I always wanted to do but never had the chance until now.

Anyway to cut a long story short my partner logged into my account and read all my messages to models. Now shes accusing me of this and that and wanting to have sex with the models blah blah

Now shes even asking me to move out and take my son away from me.

So I think this reaction is a bit over the top, whats wrong with shooting art-nude?

Nothing. There is something wrong with not telling your partner

Curious on your thoughts on the subject, I honestly dont think I have done anything wrong, it seems to me the whole issue is down to her insecurites.

Appreciate your thoughts on this situation, anyone else had issues like this with photography?

No.....but I learned long ago to be 100% transparent with my wife. If I ever do anything out of the ordinary I talK to my wife ASAP....Hopefully before I engage in any behavior that could draw suspicion. The suspicion comes from doing something behind her back.

Sorry man. Hate to come across like judgy mcjudgingface but that is my two cents. Directness and honesty is pretty much the only way to sustain a relationship......and this is coming from an emotional midget.....

Edit:

My advice is ask the moderator to delete this. We cannot help you. Go talk to her. Openly and honestly. You stepped in it. Make it right. If she didn't have trust issues before she will now. I have been married for 18 years and I think my wife finally lost her issues when I went 100% transparent.

I am fully with you golfhov. My Wife and I are approaching our 28th anniversary. We have everything in common, we have separate email accounts, but they are all in a common email client. We know each other's PWs for all accounts. Not because we don't trust each other, but so we can support each other. If I forget a PW she can remind me. I don't keep secrets from my wife, we work together, play together, live together, raise our kids together and I look forward to growing old together.

Good for you. I am really not looking forward to old age. I also have a lot of my own activities. Golf(less and less these days), football with the feet, a guys trip every year, etc. I think there is nothing wrong w a balance of personal, relationship, work, and family time. It is hard to achieve these days even if we have the resources

Right now we have been apart for a few months, I accepted a job in another city. We talk and text all the time, often several times a day. We miss each other and love to talk about what has been going on during the day. The family will be moving here next month, as soon as we close on the new house, until then we talk. I have always had a side photo business, but have not started it back up here until we move into our house. If I had decided to switch up my photography and start taking "art" Nude photos. I would Definitely tell my wife. But, I would not do that to my wife. I don't have any problems with beautiful nude photos, I just have no desire to take any.

We are on the exact same page here. I do not think my wife would care at all if nudes were a subject matter for me. It is not though. Probably never will be.

I don't know why the OP can't understand why his partner is upset.

Agreed. I don't know how old he is? I am gonna guess mid 20s.

If he truly believed taking nude photos would not cause a problem with his partner, then why wait until she leaves.

He explained it as "he now had extra time and with his kid out of the house felt comfortable" . That reads strange to me.....

I know several happily married photographers who take a lot of nude photos, but in all cases their wife/partner know and approve of the photography. In many cases their wives help out in the studio. I agree with others, this speaks of a major trust issue and I don't think it is with your partner.

We see this the exact same way. Many others on here also. The photograpghy is not the problem.

This situation is like the people who go on business trips and are totally different people when they are away from their loved ones. They think they are sneaky, but after 30 years in business I have yet to see people who act like this that have not been divorced at least once. The truth gets out and relationships and families are destroyed. Again, the issue here is not taking nude photos, I don't have a problem with people taking nude photos (art or otherwise). The issue not talking about it with your partner/wife. I believe trust and respect are key to a relationship and honesty is key to making that happen.

Yeah man. I really hope he asks the moderator to take this thread down. Not only did he step in it but he doesn't realize it. This thread has filled up with a lot of harsh words for him. Some of it he deserves.

I think the biggest thing he should take from this is a lesson in just thinking outside yourself for one second. This shouldn't come as a shock that a nude woman in your girlfriends house can cause problems. If this is what he did day in and day out probably no big deal. I also hope that he has thought through all the issues in dealing with nudes. Things like contracts, releases, ID cards, having a witness/helper present, etc are UBER important to avoid the rare troublemaker