This post originally appeared on Dawn Stanyon’s professional fashion and personal branding blog Professionality. Her images, content and advice will be cross-posted here occasionally, enjoy!
Dresses are a simple go-to look for the working woman. Here are three sweater-dress looks that would be perfect for a casual Friday.
We want you to feel good about the gifts you give. Keeping in mind that it truly is the thought behind the gift and spirit of generosity with which it is given that matter most, here are Peggy’s tips for giving gifts without succumbing to stress.
Hot gift tip! We love our VT neighbor Lake Champlaign Chocolate
Ask people for hints or even a wish list. Gather ideas during the year, and write everything down.
Forget about being afraid the gift isn’t “perfect.” If you think the person will like it, chances are they will.
Spending more than you should takes the fun out of gift giving. There’s nothing more stressful than overspending—and feeling uneasy about it.
If you’re shopping in July and see a sweater that your mother would love, buy it. It probably won’t be there when you look in December.
Stash a few gifts that will work in a pinch: copies of your favorite cookbook, a good bottle of wine, or boxes of beautiful note cards. That way you’ll be ready if need a gift on the spot.
This open thread is your space to use as you like. We invite you to discuss current and traditional etiquette. Feel free to ask questions of each other and the community moderators here.
Q: I’ve been the supervisor of a small medical clinic for the past couple of years. Unfortunately, I’m having a problem with a secretary who’s been with the company for two decades. She isn’t entirely truthful, and often embellishes the severity of incidents and starts office gossip. Most recently, in talking to another co-worker about some instructions I’d left one day when I was running late, she made it sound like I’d put a huge load on her and she had “fixed” it when in reality I’d offered to do whatever was necessary to get the work done. Many of my co-workers have commented on her sneakiness, but won’t let me confront her on it because they don’t want to be singled out as having “tattled” on her. How should I handle this situation?
A: By not challenging your employee’s behavior you are implicitly condoning it, and the longer such behavior goes unchallenged, the harder it becomes to address. Calling attention to her actions is the right thing to do. The key here is to address the specific problem, rather than criticize her general behavior. The next time your co-worker “embellishes” a situation you’re personally involved with, ask to speak with her in private. Be sure to bring along any available documentation supporting your version of the situation. Then carefully lay out the details of what happened and explain why you’re frustrated: “Marge, your description made it appear as if I’d dumped extra work on you, when really I’d offered to work through lunch or stay late to relieve you of the burden. You and I both know this.” Finally, inform her that if it happens again, you’ll take things further: “Next time I’ll have to make this part of your evaluation. Are we clear about this?” Concluding with the question is important, because this establishes that you both understand exactly what will happen if the situation reoccurs. Good luck.
Q: My boyfriend and I are going to a black tie wedding in a month- the groom is from my boyfriend’s circle of friends of the past 8 years. In fact my boyfriend introduced the bride to his friend as she was his co worker at the time 2 years ago. The groom did not include my boyfriend in the bridal party which is fine since he has 3 brothers and included just one friend of the circle. A month ago the groom did ask my boyfriend to do a reading at the ceremony so now we are included in the rehearsal dinner too. In February the groom mentioned thoughts for a bachelor’s party to my boyfriend who would naturally be a part of it but now we found out through the one friend in the wedding party that the groom has been sending out emails regarding the bachelors party but my boyfriend is not on the list. Granted my boyfriend would rather not go but I know his feelings are hurt a bit. Perhaps the groom decided to just include groomsmen? Is it possible the groom forgot him? Do I have to let this go or is there some subtle thing I can say to someone? He might be lucky not to have to go but I think it is the sentiment that matters. I did mention it to the mutual friend in the wedding party to just say hey isn’t this weird?, but he live overseas so isn’t attending the b party but agreed it was weird and a surprise but I have no idea if he’ll mention it to the groom though I did not want to ask him to do it. Maybe its better left alone- but etiquette wise is it wrong to be kind of offended?
A: It is best to leave it be and not worry about it. Ordinarily, the groom does not plan his own bachelor party and it may be a group comprised of family and a few closer friends than your boyfriend might be. If he would really prefer not to go then he will be relieved not to be included, and shouldn’t take it as a slap or slight, since you have no idea what the circumstances are. You also would not want to try to wangle him an invitation any more than you have done because that could make things awkward, even though your intentions are most honorable.
This post is brought to you by Photobook Press. Take a look at the new line of Emily Post Wedding Photobooks. FINE CUSTOM PHOTOBOOKS