In need of rescue from Gear hell

Hello!

Some time ago I bought a Canon SX210 IS, in order to understand manual shooting.

Since then, I became sort of allergic to the Canon's confetti noise in that point and shoot, so I thought it's time to get my first DSLR.

Unfortunately I have entered in a loop of Gear options and don't know what to choose.

I saw reviews for all of the products, maybe all the reviews, but I still have doubts.

Here's the loop from hell I'm in and the concerns I have:

Option 1:

Sony A58

+ Cheapest, 20MP, Colors, Electronic viewfinder, Tilt screen, static mirror, dedicated ISO button, external Mic, bracketing, auto LCD off when using the viewfinder.

Concerns:

- Why in the world is it so cheap having all these features?!

- Terrible splotchy noise on mid-high ISO on test sites.

- It has all the things I want, but are they Usable? Or just gimmicky?

Option 2:

Nikon D3300

+ Cheap, 24MP, Sharp images, no confetti noise in high ISO.

Concerns:

- Optical viewfinder, no tilt screen, no bracketing, no live view simulation of changes you make, no dedicated ISO button, people reporting how frustrating it is to use.

Option 3:

Nikon D5200

+ 24MP, tilt screen, same price as d3300.

Concerns:

- The same terrible confetti noise like on my point and shoot on high ISO.

- Photos are not as sharp as the d3300 and even the Sony A58.

- Users are reporting frustrations while using the camera.

So I loop from Option1 to Option 3 and can't make a choice.

My main goals are to obtain less noise than my 14mp Canon, which even on ISO 80 produces images with "Where the hell did you get those pixels from?!" quality.

And goal N2 is to have usability.

My Canon has all manual options, but most of them I don't use because it takes forever to reach them, or even worst, they have little to no effect on the image itself.

Although the camera advertises to have a lot of options and rage for maneuvering, around 70% of it has negligible to no effect on the image you're taking.

This is why when I look at the Sony and see how it has all the things I want, like an EVF, so I can see changes before taking the shot, a tilt screen so I can take annoying photos of ants, and so on and so on. I fear that all these options will be "gimmicky".

So what if it has an EVF but it's so terrible that you can't use it?!

Or so what if it has 20MP but it's so noisy that you can't use it and it produces noise in every shadow.

Why is the Sony so damned cheap compared to the Nikon models with such features which are almost twice as expensive?!

Then I jump on the "It's all about image quality" train and go for the d3300.

I Love how sharp the images look on that camera and how the noise on high ISO doesn't look like rainbow vomit.

But, with Optical viewfinder, no live preview of changes, and no tilt screen, no ISO button, will I be sacrificing goal N2 Usability? Even yesterday I was out taking photos with the point and shoot and it was hard to take photos in strong sunlight low on the ground.

So what if it has the best image quality if I can't take the shot I want? Or if there's no live view of the shot I'm taking and end up taking a badly configured shot?!

Image quality with no usability makes little sense.

Then I jump on the "Let's compromise!" train with the d5200.

It has a tilt screen so I can take most of the shots I want, and it has 24mp with acceptable noise on low ISO, but it's not nearly as sharp as the d3300, and that confetti noise on high ISO is terrible, plus the no live preview of the shot.

And then I jump to the "Maybe I need Usability And the quality of the A58 is OK, because even though on high ISO it has terrible noise, I will never shoot on high ISO, just like I don't do it on the point and shoot" train... and the loop starts all over again.

It's unbearable

And worst of all, all the reviewers on youtube only mention the "tech specs" of the cameras, without actually having an opinion on their usability.

What should I do if I want to have less noise and more usability?

Which of these 3 is the best choice in your opinion, with real world usability, not numbers on paper?