Mark Vs. Marek: Tales of Ishawuru Pt. 2 – [Another Perspective By Oluwole Leigh]

Posted by: Editor April 5, 2014 in Oluwole Leigh - Another Perspective, Opinion Leave a comment

Ishawuru hears the words ‘Emi ni, Emi Marek ni’. Marek rushes into the hut and starts screaming ‘Baba, Baba, Egba mi’. Ishawuru looks up with surprise and is shocked to see a foreigner rush into his hut with nothing on except his boxers.

Ishawuru believes Marek is a re-incarnation of his dead grandfather and attempts to head for the window. Marek shouts again ‘Baba Egbami’. Marek rushes after Baba to convince him he is not a ghost.

Marek: Baba, Human ni mi

Baba looks back, picks up some dust from the ground and throws it on him. The dust sticks on Marek and he is convinced that Marek is human.

Baba: Arakunrin, ki loruko re?
Marek: Marek
Baba: Mareki ,Irunmole o gbo eboo, Ireke loruko re

Baba informs Marek that his new name is ‘Sugarcane’ and asks Marek to explain why he is running about half naked

Baba: Ireke, ki lo gbe e de biyi
Marek: Awon Enemy
Baba: Iru ota wo, Orisirisi Ota meta lo wa nile aye- Ikini, Ota Amoniseni, Ikeji Ota Aifamoniseni, Iketa – Ota Asenibanidaro . ki loruko awon ota na?
Marek: Spark
Baba: Spakiiiiiiiii, Mo daran, Ota Amoniseni niyen

Baba explains the three categories of enemies (Familiar enemies, distant enemies and enemies who pretend to be friends)

Marek goes on to explain how his company (Rocket) sent him to Nigeria to start Jovago. Since they started, the incumbent (hotels.ng) had made their lives hell. They had known little sleep. Servers were crashing, files were missing and databases were corrupted. He continued the lamentations and suddenly burst into tears. Baba asks why he is crying

Baba: Ogbeni , ki lo de ton sunkun ?
Marek: Aah, Baba , Baba
Baba: ki lo de?
Marek: Mo gbe babe kan lo sile
Baba: Ki lo wa sele?
Marek: Mo fun ni drink
Baba: ki lo wa sele?
Marek: Mo bo trouser
Baba: ki lo wa sele?
Marek: kini o stand
Baba: kini ?
Marek: kini
Baba: haaaaaaa
Marek: ko stand mo lati afternoon
Baba: Ireke, won ti so e di abo okunrin niyen. Oda na ,Ninu wahala Spaki at wahala ‘kini’ , ewo lo fe ka dojuko

Baba asks him to choose between solving the Spark problem or solving his issues of erectile dysfunction. Marek chooses to solve the Spark issue. Baba tells him the ‘juju’ is named after Arsene Wenger.

Baba: Ogun ti mo fe se fun e nipa oro spaki yi, ni a n pe ni Ogun Wenger
Marek: Wenger?
Baba: Beni, Oya kunle fun adura, bi mo se n gbadura ni kiwo ma so amin
Marek: Amin
Baba: Ki Idamu Wenger je idamu Spakii
Marek: Amin
Baba: Ki Oriire Wenger je Oriire Spaki
Marek: Amin
Baba: Ibeere ko lonise, Ninu iwe Eklesiastu ori keje ese kejo (Ecclesisates 7:8), opin nnkan san ju ipilese re lo. Opin Roketi ma san. Aigboran ati Aigboran Wenger na lo ma se Spakii. Oluwa ti fase si, awon irunmole na ti fowo si.

Baba turns to Marek and informs him of the sacrifice which he has to take to Ajose Adeogun junction- (Seven Ipads, seven Iphones, seven chargers) and Marek makes his way out. Marek stops outside the hut and notices an old poster. He wipes the dust off the poster. The poster reveals Ishawuru when he was much younger. He looks at the name on the bottom and reads it slowly – Soul E.

Ajose Adeogun Junction
A police van was seen taking some naked men away from Ajose Adeogun. Bankole, Jason, Mark and Marek are heard pleading their innocence. The arresting officer places a call to his DPO.

Officer: Sir, we don pick them up
DPO: How many dem be?
Officer: Sir, we don arrest 3 and a half men.
DPO: What………..?