The Taste of Chicago music menu deserves its own rating system:
*** PUT DOWN THAT CHICKEN KABOB AND PAY ATTENTION AT ALL COSTS
** WILL NOT GIVE YOU STOMACH CRAMPS WHILE YOU MUNCH
* GET A HOAGIE, HEAD FOR THE WASHROOM, GO ANYWHERE BUT HERE
Friday June 26:
*** Charlie Wilson and Cameo, 5:30 p.m. at the Petrillo Music Shell. If it’s ‘80s electro-funk you want, you’ve come to the right stage, with the Gap Band’s Charlie Wilson headlining while Cameo is sure to rev up the still-thrilling “Word Up” as the opener.
** Indie Rock and Power Pop, 11 a.m.-8:30 p.m. on the Illinois Lottery Taste Stage. No big names, but I’m a fan of Holding Mercury’s hooks-heavy 2008 release, “Downfall of an Empire.” Their set starts at 4:15 p.m.
Saturday June 27
*** Andre Williams Trio, noon at the Illinois Lottery Taste Stage. A day devoted to the riches in the Bloodshot Records artist roster kicks off with the loose, lascivious, completely unpredictable Williams, followed by sets from the Deadstring Brothers, Dollar Store, Scotland Yard Gospel Choir and the Waco Brothers.
* Counting Crows, 5:30 p.m. at the Petrillo Music Shell. Remember the ‘mid-‘90s? Because that’s were you’ll be stuck when Adam Duritz and company rewind their 15 minutes of fame with “Mr. Jones.”
Sunday June 28
** The Lovehammers, 5 p.m. at the Petrillo Band Shell. The South Side veterans always deliver a bar-band buzz. Their enthusiasm and energy should easily eclipse headliners the Wallflowers.
* Cover bands, noon-8:30 p.m. at the Illinois Lottery Taste Stage. With all the fine bands in Chicago writing and performing original material, why a whole day and stage has been devoted to the kind of music you can hear at any wedding or cruise ship is embarrassing.
Monday June 29
*** World music, noon-8:30 p.m. at Illinois State Lottery Taste Stage. A style-hopping panoply of bands steeped in Caribbean, Latin and African sounds. I particularly enjoy the jazz-flavored Afro-funk of the Chicago Afrobeat Project (5:15 p.m.).
** Broadway in Chicago, 6 p.m. at the Petrillo Band Shell. A shot of “Jersey Boys” will highlight this revue, along with songs from “Mary Poppins,” “Young Frankenstein” and more. Too bad it won’t also include the excellent “Million Dollar Quartet” cast that rocked the Goodman.
Tuesday June 30
*** Aron Burton and Two for the Blues with “Honeyboy” Edwards, 5:15 p.m. at the Illinois Lottery Taste Stage. Burton is a solid journeyman who can deliver on guitar and unhurried vocals, and Edwards is one of the last living links to the Robert Johnson era.
* Barenaked Ladies, 5:30 p.m. at Petrillo Band Shell. Not as funny as they think they are, and about a decade past their prime.
Wednesday July 1
*** Ne-Yo with Keri Hilson, 5:30 p.m. at the Petrillo Band Shell. Among the latest legion of R&B heart-throbs, Ne-Yo (Shaffer Smith) is a master of the heartbreak ballad. But I wonder how gloom classics such as "Why Does She Stay" and "Fade into the Background" will go over amid the usual Taste frivolity, or whether he’ll even have the courage to sing them. Here’s hoping he does.
* More tribute bands, noon to 8:30 p.m. at the Illinois Lottery Taste Stage. The only possible redeeming feature of seeing bands cover U2, the Rolling Stones and the Eagles is that you don’t have to pay U2-level prices.
Thursday, July 2
*** Thrill Jockey Records Day, from noon-to-8:30 p.m. at the Petrillo Band Shell. An entire day of one of the quirkiest, coolest label rosters in all independent music. Special props to the incendiary trio led by saxophone legend Fred Anderson (3:30 p.m.), the rollicking celebration of 8 Bold Souls (7 p.m.) and a rare Eleventh Dream Day sighting --- maybe Rick Rizzo will lay some new songs on us (5:15 p.m.).
* Super Diamond with Afrodisiacs, 5:30 p.m. at the Petrillo Band Shell. Yet another cover act, this time a San Francisco group that requires six guys to emulate one larger-than-life performer, Neil Diamond.
Friday July 3:
*** Fireworks with the 85th Army Band, 7:30 p.m. at the Petrillo Band Shell. The All-American light show. What more do you need on July 4th eve?
** Liz Toussaint, 1:45 p.m. at the Illinois Lottery Taste Stage. Toussaint bills herself as the love child of Kenny Rogers and Anita Baker, which isn’t a pretty picture. But she’s got a decent voice in a neo-soul sister kind of a way.
Saturday July 4
*** Booker T and the Drive by Truckers, with Buddy Guy and Guster, 3 p.m. at the Petrillo Band Shell. Though I’m not a big fan of his latest album, Booker T Jones is a legendary soul man, and his collaboration with the Southern roots rockers has the potential to rekindle some of the previous night’s fireworks.
** Songs for Presidents, noon-3 p.m. at the Illinois Lottery Taste Stage. Dozens of indie artists pay tribute in song to the 44 Chief Executives.
Sunday July 5
*** Gospel and jazz, noon to 5:30 p.m. at the Illinois Lottery Taste Stage. The hosannas will rain from on high with Arthur Sutton and the Gift of Praise (1:30 p.m.) and the Shekinah Glory Ministry (3 p.m.), capped off by saxophone great Von Freeman (4:30 p.m.).
** Mitchel Musso and Jordan Pruitt, 2:30 p.m. at the Petrillo Band Shell. Second-tier Disney stars should keep the kids occupied while the adults wind down the holiday with some beach-blanket toasts.
greg@gregkot.com