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Breast Cancer Husband: How to Help Your Wife (and Yourself) during Diagnosis, Treatment and Beyond
 
 
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Breast Cancer Husband: How to Help Your Wife (and Yourself) during Diagnosis, Treatment and Beyond [Paperback]

Marc Silver (Author)

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Book Description

September 9, 2004 1579548334 978-1579548339 1
A unique guide, like none other on the market-packed with medical information, practical tips, psychological insight, and coping strategies-to help men help the women they love through this trying time.

When Marc Silver became a breast cancer husband three years ago, he learned firsthand how frightened and helpless the breast cancer husband feels. He searched in vain for a book that would give him the information and advice he so desperately sought. Now this award-winning journalist has compiled just the kind of emotionally supportive and useful resource that he wished he had been able to consult-to give men the tools they need to help their wives, their families, and themselves through this scary, uncertain time.

In his years as a consumer journalist and veteran of the News You Can Use staff at U.S. News & World Report, Marc Silver learned what kind of information and advice on medical crises readers found most valuable. He draws on that experience as he covers in depth all the issues couples coping with breast cancer will have to face during diagnosis, treatment, and beyond. Highlights include:
- The shared experiences of other breast cancer husbands
- Guidance from top cancer doctors in the country
- Advice on when, how, and what to tell your young children
- Tips on coping with radiation and chemotherapy
- A candid discussion of sex and intimacy following breast cancer surgery

More than 200,000 women are diagnosed with cancer each year in the United States. At last, with this book, the men who love them have a road map to help them through a difficult and unprecedented journey.
A unique guide, like none other on the market-packed with medical information, practical tips, psychological insight, and coping strategies-to help men help the women they love through this trying time.

When Marc Silver became a breast cancer husband three years ago, he learned firsthand how frightened and helpless the breast cancer husband feels. He searched in vain for a book that would give him the information and advice he so desperately sought. Now this award-winning journalist has compiled just the kind of emotionally supportive and useful resource that he wished he had been able to consult-to give men the tools they need to help their wives, their families, and themselves through this scary, uncertain time.

In his years as a consumer journalist and veteran of the News You Can Use staff at U.S. News & World Report, Marc Silver learned what kind of information and advice on medical crises readers found most valuable. He draws on that experience as he covers in depth all the issues couples coping with breast cancer will have to face during diagnosis, treatment, and beyond. Highlights include:
- The shared experiences of other breast cancer husbands
- Guidance from top cancer doctors in the country
- Advice on when, how, and what to tell your young children
- Tips on coping with radiation and chemotherapy
- A candid discussion of sex and intimacy following breast cancer surgery

More than 200,000 women are diagnosed with cancer each year in the United States. At last, with this book, the men who love them have a road map to help them through a difficult and unprecedented journey.

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Breast Cancer Husband: How to Help Your Wife (and Yourself) during Diagnosis, Treatment and Beyond + Just Get Me Through This!: A Practical Guide to Coping with Breast Cancer + Breast Cancer Survival Manual, Fourth Edition: A Step-by-Step Guide for the Woman With Newly Diagnosed Breast Cancer
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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Silver, an editor at U.S. News & World Report, speaks encouragingly in this heartfelt, useful guide for men whose wives or girlfriends have been diagnosed with breast cancer, as was his wife, Marsha, in 2001. Silver, who consulted with surgeons and oncologists for this book, first helps readers deal with the diagnosis, addressing men's stereotypical reactions (usually saying little, followed by overbearing urges to fix the problem), then advising them how to behave (ask questions and, more importantly, listen). He nicely interweaves comments from men and women who have gone through breast cancer diagnosis, setting them off with pull quotes and how-to sidebars such as "Husbanding Her Energies" and "Caring for the Caregiver." His advice is simple and sound: rather than saying "Cheer up, honey, the doctor said things aren't that bad," Silver recommends, "Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?" He discusses the surprisingly numerous cases in which men have left their spouses, discusses the importance of wives having an "appointment pal" and advises on explaining cancer to children. Silver also smartly examines the various treatments and suggests ways for readers to find sexual intimacy after mastectomy. This guide is an invaluable complement to Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book and John Link's The Breast Cancer Survival Manual.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

From Library Journal. May 1, 2005
Husbands and partners are usually the odd men out in books on breast cancer. Silver, an editor at U.S. News & World Report , didn't know what to do when his wife was diagnosed. Finding no books specifically from his perspective, he decided to write one. Gleaning information from medical professionals and other men in his position, he created a helpful guide that covers all manner of providing support, even down to instructions for washing a woman's hair while she has drains in place. Silver's Husband is funny, tender, and rock-solid.

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Customer Reviews
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
44 of 45 people found the following review helpful
Absolutely Essential! September 30, 2004
Format:Paperback
If you are reading this, there is a good chance that you are a new (and doubtless unwilling) member of the not-so-elite group of men who have become Breast Cancer Husbands. If so, stop reading this and buy this book. (Full disclosure: I was contacted by Marc Silver, the author, last year and interviewed extensively about my own experiences; I am quoted several times in the book.) I only wish that this book existed two years ago when my wife of 23 years was disgnosed with breast cancer; it is an invaluable resource that informs men in an accurate, succinct fashion exactly what is likely to happen at each stage of the diagnosis and treatment process. But Mr. Silver's arroach to the topic is hardly clinical. He deals with some of the most heart-wrenching topics any man will ever have to face with an eye on reality and a deft touch of humor. Breast cancer and humor in the same sentence? You've got to be kidding, right? Well, he pulls it off, managing to inject a lighter touch without ever minimizing the seriousness of his topic. Personally, I think most people use humor anyway to deal with the toughest situations, and the big "C" was no exception for my wife and I. Whether you are starting this journey, or if you've been through it like Marc and I have, this book is bound to become your most valuable resource, because it is told from the mouths of real Breast Cancer Husbands with real, true-life stories. With literally hundreds of books available for women who are dealing with this horrible disease, a book like this directed at the men simply did not exist. It was long overdue.
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33 of 34 people found the following review helpful
There's a reason it's popular December 30, 2004
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
I'll chime in from the daughter's point of view: I got this book for my stepfather after reading the reviews, and it did not disappoint. It speaks directly to men and concerns they might not want to talk about (no beating around the bush) but the tone isn't annoying or Neanderthal. After reading it one thinks much of it is common sense-- but sometimes one needs to be reminded of what's common sense! (And maybe what seems like common sense to a 30-something woman may not be the first thing that comes to mind for the average 50 to 80-year-old guy under stress.) Anyway, my stepfather finished it in three days, so that's a good sign. It opened my eyes to some things too.

One tip: Cure rates are very high for early-stage breast cancer these days. Guys, skip the later chapters about "dealing with loss" unless you get to that point. Most women will recover, so no need to freak oneself out at the beginning. As we say in my family, "We'll fall off that bridge when we come to it."

Also recommended for women or for very involved family members: "Just Get Me Through This" (lots of helpful tips) and the two books by John Link (lots of technical info).
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19 of 19 people found the following review helpful
By Marie
Format:Paperback
This book is wonderful! I bought it for my husband after we recently learned that I have breast cancer for a second time and we are both reading it. It is packed with information but somehow reads like a good novel. I already can tell my husband is being more sensitive to my needs because of Marc's advice. So many things Marc Silver has written that I am so glad my husband will be reading. They are things I want him to know!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
Helpful Reference
A friend of mine told me about this book. Someone had given it to her husband. I purchased it for my brother-in-law. My sister says it has been just as helpful to her. Read more
Published 5 months ago by Mary A. Tinsley
Breast Cancer Husband: How to Help Your Wife and Yourself
What a great idea this book is! Often people don't think of what the husband is going through. This book addresses all of these issues and is very good. Read more
Published 7 months ago by Theresa W.
FABULOUS FIND!!!
I am a stage 4 cancer survivor and I LOVE this book! I, like so many others, wish I had found this book earlier. Read more
Published 8 months ago by I love my kid
Order this book as soon as you receive the diagnosis
Within a day or so after my wife was unexpectedly diagnosed with breast cancer, I started looking for resources for her and came across this book. Read more
Published 11 months ago by Mox
Help For the Husband of the Breast Cancer Patient
It's not only the breast cancer patient who needs information and help, it's also her husband. This is a great book providing that help. Read more
Published 12 months ago by Betty Ellyn
I Wish I Did Not Have a Reason to Read This Book.....
Marc Silva certainly wishes he didn't have a reason to write this book. Fortunately for the rest of us, he did write it, and it's a wealth of down-to-earth, sometimes humorous and... Read more
Published 17 months ago by francine ruotolo
Excellent resource for us guys.
This book is written by a guy, for guys. If your wife (or girlfriend) has just been diagnosed with breast cancer, your life is about to change dramatically. Read more
Published 18 months ago by RB_Double-A_Bravo
Much needed
Every husband and even grown children needs to read this. It made me, the pasient also feel "normal". If you know a husband, buy it and give it to him. Read more
Published 18 months ago by dboshoff
Hubby wanted this!
I originally requested this book from my library for my husband. When it was time to return it, I asked him if he'd want a copy. Read more
Published 18 months ago by Michele
WONDERFUL RESOURCE
This is a wonderful resource. I first saw it mentioned on AOL with extensive comments and came to Amazon to buy a couple of copies for the Infusion Center at UCSF (U. Read more
Published 18 months ago by Jerry Autry
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Inside This Book (learn more)
First Sentence:
When the news came, I was a husband behaving badly. Read the first page
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
breast cancer husband, breast radiation oncologist, appointment pal, breast cancer couples, cancer husbands, breast specialist, cancer docs, chemo room, breast cancer program, chemo brain, chemo drugs, breast center, chemo patients, breast surgeon, first chemo, breast cancer survivor, axillary dissection, breast cancer diagnosis, bilateral mastectomy, sentinel node, wig shop, breast cancer patients, abdominal tissue, metastatic disease, oncology nurse
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Lillie Shockney, New Normal, Marisa Weiss, Johns Hopkins Breast Center, National Cancer Institute, New York City, Roz Kleban, Chevy Chase, Linda Ellerbee, Matthew Loscalzo, Susan Love, Hester Hill Schnipper, Memorial Sloan-Kettering, Old Normal, American Cancer Society, Carol Stevenson, Cynthia Drogula, Frank Sadowski, Fred Smith, Michael Tucker, Patricia Spicer, San Francisco, Venus Masselam, Carol Shields, Colton Young
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Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Index | Back Cover | Surprise Me!
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