May 6, 2011

Tom Corbett, Your Next American Idol

Total People in Discussion: 8

   I’ve been working on this for a couple of weeks as a column, but with the unveiling of my Tom Corbett Bumper Sticker campaign results in Saturday’s paper, I figured I was beating on him enough there for the moment. So it became one of my two blogs posts today before I embark on a well-deserved vacation.

   I’ll still be checking in regularly, so keep the Comments coming, if you’re so inclined.

   Let’s do it:

   Host Ryan Seacrest, standing behind the “American Idol” panel of judges, announced, “Opening the show for us tonight is Pennsylvania Gov. Tom Corbett. Let’s see what he’s going to do.”

May 6, 2011

Best Movies About Royalty

Total People in Discussion: 15

     In the wake of royal wedding, I received a suggestion for a movie list of the Best Movies About Royalty. This will be one of two blog posts from me today, so be sure to stop back for my latest tribute to Gov. Corbett.

    I thought about restricting it to British royalty, but I decided we’d get a better spread of good movies if we include everyone.

   This required some value judgments. “Lawrence of Arabia,” for example, includes Prince Feisal, but although he’s a great character, it’s not about him, so I left it out. As you add to my own Top 10, feel free to interpret the category however you prefer. I confess that I haven’t seen many of the movies that came up in my Internet search – including this year’s Oscar winner, “The King’s Speech” – so I left them out.

   Let’s go:

May 5, 2011

American Idol and Hall of Fame

Total People in Discussion: 2

       Before I get to my weekly “American Idol” commentary, I have some final thoughts on this year’s balloting for my Hall of Fame of the area’s most colorful characters.

      As you’ll see here, this year’s choice is developer Abe Atiyeh, the Rajah of Rezoning. Congratulate him if you see him.

      In his induction speech for the Baseball Hall of Fame, beloved Phillies announcer Harry Kalas told the following story about his longtime broadcast partner, fellow Hall of Famer Rich Ashburn:

      “Whitey had a marvelous sense of humor,” Kalas said. “I remember doing games with him, and it would be getting late in the game, late in the evening, and Whitey would say on the air, I wonder if the people at Celebres Pizza are listening tonight?’ Well, within 15 minutes, bang, pizzas are delivered to the radio booth.

     “This went on for a little while, and pretty soon Phillies management called him in, and they said, ‘Richie, Celebres Pizza is not one of our sponsors. We can’t be giving them free plugs.’ Now, we do birthday and anniversary announcements on the air. So shortly after his meeting with the Philadelphia brass, it’s getting late again in the evening, and he’s getting hungry. He said, ‘Well, I have very special birthday wishes to send out tonight to the Celebres twins, plain and pepperoni.’”

    In a perfect world, the inductees into my Hall of Fame would have the opportunity to deliver great speeches like that one. Indeed, inaugural Hall of Famer Ron Angle has pushed me to stage some kind of soiree for the new and old immortals, and I encouraged them this spring to contact me if they would be willing to attend such an event.

   I was skeptical about the level of interest, and I was right. The only inductee who responded was former Bethlehem Councilman and Hall of Famer Jim Gregory, who always has been a much better sport about this than I deserve. He even contacted several of his fellow luminaries to encourage them to join him, but there was a dearth of enthusiasm, which is understandable, since many of them can’t stand me.

   Just the other day, I also heard from Victor Tropiano, Hall of Fame great Emma Tropiano’s son, offering to attend in his late mother’s honor, and we had a fun exchange of emails. Unfortunately, that still only makes three attendees.

    Nonetheless, Angle hasn’t given up. As I discussed Atiyeh's merits with him Wednesday, Angle renewed his call for an induction ceremony, particularly since he believes Atiyeh would actually be willing to attend. He also promises to hit up a few other Hall of Famers, although I’ve heard that from him before.

   I spoke with Atiyeh Wednesday evening, and he did not seem particularly pleased with this honor or my coverage of him in general, so his attendance seems highly unlikely.

    But on the off chance that he has a change of heart, I’ll say this: If Abe Atiyeh is game for an induction ceremony, I’ll stage something here at The Morning Call and give all the living Hall of Famers and/or their heirs and other dignitaries one last invitation.

    Meanwhile, I want to acknowledge the final batch of new nominees contributed by our readers. I also received seconds to several nominations.

    The new people named were:

     Bethlehem Area School Directors Loretta Leeson and Rosie Amato. Coplay Borough Councilman Marvin Mann and Joseph Groller. And businessman and political commentator John Brinson, whose recent column about the American Civil War earned him a flurry of nominations.

    I very much appreciate the contributions of so many readers who have argued the cause of their favorites, either because they find their conduct appalling or because they admire their colorful contributions to Lehigh Valley life. Unfortunately, I can’t induct every deserving individual each year, or the Hall would run out of space for their busts.

   Now, on to the colorful characters of “American Idol”:

May 4, 2011

What Is It? The Answer

Total People in Discussion: 5

     I got some interesting guesses on last week's "What Is It?" item, which is shown there at the left.

     Many of the early guesses involved fishing, which is logical enough, since it has a spear-like appearance. To enhance the chances that someone might actually answer this correctly, I eventually commented that it has nothing to do with fish.

    The clue didn't matter. No one got it right.

    Before I offer the answer, I'll remind you that this is the first of a treasure trove of items from an Allentown couple who gave me an initial haul of five "What Is Its?" and have placed many more at my disposal. I'm on vacation next week, so I'll throw the second one out two weeks from today. It promises to be a great summer for this feature.

   OK, here's the answer:

May 3, 2011

Chili Madness

Total People in Discussion: 7

     I'm The Morning Call's go-to guy when a food judge or other skilled eater is required, and I'm certainly not complaining. I've eaten some amazing dishes and become familiar with some great local chefs.

     One event I hadn't ever been asked to help judge was the chili cook-off for the annual "Spring on Fourth. What's on Third?" event in South Bethlehem, so I was glad when I got the call this year.

    If you haven't visited the South Side in a while, it's time. A terrific array of restaurants and shops have sprung up around the familiar holdovers, and they're increasingly being complemented with developments on the Bethlehem Steel tract. Between eating in one of those cool restaurants, browsing in one of the nice shops, visiting SteelStax for a movie and music and then swinging over to the Sands, you could have a terrific afternoon or evening.

    I remember well what Third Street was like when I was a Lehigh student, a string of dingy stores perpetually Going Out of Business. Outside of a run-down bowling alley on Third and some bars on Fourth and other scattered locations, there wasn't much to do.

    I saw the change up-close Saturday. Two teams of judges were split up to handle the 36 participating chili-makers. I quickly discovered that we not only would get to eat a lot of terrific chili -- including several vegetarian and even vegan styles -- but that our judging machine would be liberally lubricated with free beer and margaritas. It was a lot of fun.

   As it happens, the second stop on our list of 18 turned out to be the best. Tulum, a tiny Beth-Mex restaurant at 17 W. Morton St., offered chili that was a smoky standout. I'm told all its food is that good. My wife and I will be back there soon for dinner.

   Deja Brew Coffeehouse and Deli, which offered a very interesting vegetarian chili, was second on our list, and Starter's finished third. Northampton Community College, Cutter's and Apotheca Salon -- choices of the other team -- rounded out the top six, although we all ended up concurring on Tulum and Deja Brew is Nos. 1 and 2. Molly's, which was part of the other group's route (but which we checked out anyway, and loved) was the People's Choice.

   Seeing the South Side's streets full of people and vendors would have been a thrill for me even I hadn't been eating chili and drinking beer. I encourage all of you to watch for the date next year -- and get there early to purchase a passport that gives you access to all the chili. They ran out of passports surprisingly quickly.

   Early on, our judging team joined up with a Channel 69 two-man crew covering the event, and they got to eat a lot of chili with us. The cameraman shot me up close as I sampled Tulum's chili, and I learned the next morning in church that I ended up on their evening newscast. I'd have linked their segment for you here, but I couldn't find it. This probably is just as well.

    I'll report back from Tulum once we've had dinner there. Meanwhile, I encourage you to see for yourself how South Bethlehem is changing.

    One last thing. An old softball coaching colleague sent a link today to a video that I've seen several times before -- and that still brings me to tears every time. Believe me, you don't need to be a sports fan to be moved by this. Here it is:

        

 

 

 

May 2, 2011

Bin Laden

Total People in Discussion: 21

    I was at Sunday night's Phillies-Mets game, so I was part of that remarkable scene where the crowd was chanting "USA! USA!" as news spread about the killing of Osama bin Laden.

    I started a post about the experience, but it turned into a column instead. Since I'm no stranger to relentless self-promotion, I encourage you to read it in Tuesday's paper or morningcall.com later today.

   Before all that happened, I was going to write about the annual "Spring on Fourth! What's On Third? Street Festival and Chili Cook-off," at which I was an enthusiastic judge, but bin Laden really is the story of the day, so I'll put chili off until Tuesday.

   Instead, I'll throw out a question on the off-chance that some of you are itching to weigh in on these events.

April 29, 2011

Movie Quote Quiz

Total People in Discussion: 19

    Today’s Movie Quote Quiz features films in which one or more of just two stars appear.

    It’s a mark of the success of both these men that I could build an entire quiz from their movies – and still have some very good ones left over. Once you recognize either of those themes, throw them out in the Comments to help in the search for the movies in which these quotes were spoken. I think you’ll find at least a few of them are pretty tough.

   Before  we test your mettle and review the rules, permit me a shameless plug. I’ll be one of the chili judges at Saturday’s “What’s on Third Chili Contest,” part of the Spring on Fourth festivities in South Bethlehem. I'm told there are 35 entries, and although I won't have to taste all of them, I'll still be eating a lot of chili.

    All this will take place from noon to 2 p.m. If you see me over there, please say hi.

   OK, the rules:

   Only answer a couple of these on the first go-round, even if you recognize many more. I think it’s nice to give lots of people a chance to participate.

   Lest there are some newcomers stumbling in, I’ll also note that it is illegal to look the quotes up on the Internet if you intend to participate. This crime in punishable by a $500 fine and 30 days in the county lockup, so it’s certainly not worth the risk just for the momentary pleasure of falsely appearing to be intelligent.

   Ready? Let’s go:

April 28, 2011

American Idol and the Royal Wedding

Total People in Discussion: 15

    Before I get to my summary of this week's "American Idol," a word about Friday's royal wedding.

   Is there anyone out there who intends to spend the day watching television coverage of this event? If so, why?

   I'm somewhat baffled by all the excitement. Then again, I'm a guy who will sit all day watching the NFL Draft, so you may not be interested in my opinion about what makes compelling television.

   My main thought about the royal wedding is that if it weren't for his being a Prince of Wales and all -- which by the way reminds me of my favorite drinking game from college; anyone else ever play it? -- I would argue that William has totally outkicked his coverage. He's not hideous or anything, but Kate Middleton is beautiful. She could do way better.

    I'm guessing this will be one of the subjects they'll focus on during the 20 hours of coverage. It's too bad ESPN analyst Mel Kiper Jr. will be otherwise occupied, because he's very good at that kind of marathon broadcast and analysis. He could break out the the charts -- Best Royal Husbands Still Available -- and liven things up. 

    Anyway, back to "American Idol."

April 27, 2011

Separated at Birth

Total People in Discussion: 16

      My plan had been to write about bobbleheads today in the wake of Ryne Sandberg bobblehead night at the Lehigh Valley IronPigs, but it turned into a column.

    On the bright side, that gives me today's post to begin what I hope will become a popular feature, and one that I've dreamed of launching in my column for years:

    Separated at Birth.

   I gave you a stellar example in a recent post, repeated below. Those guys are virtually undistinguishable, except that one is a supercriminal from Krypton and the other is a supercriminal from Allentown.

    But a friend suggested an equally compelling combination of two celebrities who have been separated at birth: presidential hopeful Donald Trump and the late great Daniel Cipko.

   What do you think?

April 26, 2011

What Is It?

Total People in Discussion: 16

      I have hit the treasure trove of "What Is It?" items. Indeed, I think it's safe to say that we are about to enter the Golden Age of "What Is It?"

   Thanks to a tip from a former colleague, I touched base recently with Stu and Marie Lathrop of Allentown. Marie and I used to work together, too, both at the Call and at the Allentown Fair, where she was a cooking contest volunteer and I have served as a judge.

   Stu collects old tools, in some cases dating back centuries. When I visited their home last week, I was blown away at all the fantastic items he has. Best of all, he knows how they were used. In fact, he demonstrated some of them for me and showed me pictures and descriptions of some of them in reference books.

April 25, 2011

Return of Island Girl

Total People in Discussion: 5

     A few of you may recall that I've written before about the travels of a peregrine falcon called Island Girl in particular and the Falcon Research Project in general.

     A team of researchers traveled to Chile to radio-tag several adult female tundra peregrines and record their travels north to the Arctic and then back to South America. The only remaining falcon with a functioning tracking device is Island Girl, who began flying north earlier this month. She had reached Ecuador as of Sunday, and she'll eventually pass through Pennsylvania on her journey to her summer nesting grounds.

    If you go here, you can follow her progress. Go here for a blog about her travels and other news about the project.

 

 

April 22, 2011

Best Egyptian or Roman Empire Movies

Total People in Discussion: 20

     To commemorate this week’s Jewish and Christian holidays, I had considered the topic “Ten Best Movies About Religion” for this week’s list, and I got a good list started, but I ultimately decided to go in a different direction. If you want to respond with the 10 best movies about religion, feel free.

   Instead, I settled on an equally provocative, if clunky, topic that pays glancing tribute to the Passover and Easter stories: The 10 Best Movies Set in Egypt or Involving the Roman Empire.

  I considered restricting it to ancient Egypt, but I decided that was too limiting for me and for the contributions I hope you’ll make in the Comments. Here we have so many good movies to choose from, religious and otherwise, that narrowing it to 10 will be extremely difficult.

  Let’s do it:

April 21, 2011

American Idol

Total People in Discussion: 6

       They tell you to be careful what you wish for, and "American Idol" is no exception.

       After weeks of bitching because the judges won't say anything negative about anybody, I got a taste of their constructive criticism on Wednesday night's show, and I realized their advice stinks.

     For them -- actually, Randy and J-Lo, since Steven continues to be in a semiconscious state -- it's all about big notes, preferably from beginning to end. Forget nuance, forget building to a vocal climax. Forget, I suspect, the advice of vocal mentor Jimmy Iovone. Just let loose from beginning to end.

    I take it back. Judges, just be cheerleaders.

April 20, 2011

Hockey Arena

Total People in Discussion: 18

    I got a call last week from a downtown Allentown business owner who said she was unhappy about being forced to sell her building to make way for the proposed hockey arena complex. She said a real estate agent had been visiting business owners throughout the area bounded by Seventh and Eighth streets and Hamilton and Linden, warning of eminent domain and not being as forthcoming as they would like.

    We talked about this at some length, and I came away with the impression that this particular owner mostly wanted to make sure she gets top dollar.

   I don’t blame her. Her concerns, and those of other property owners who were quoted in news stories this week, are quite sensible:

April 19, 2011

Atlas Shrugged, Part 1

Total People in Discussion: 19

   I learned recently that they’ve come out with Part 1 of the movie version of Ayn Rand’s “Atlas Shrugged.”

   The reviews so far seem pretty savage, which isn’t terribly surprising. Of her two best-selling novels, I prefer “The Fountainhead,” but while the basic stories are compelling, both of them suffer from all kinds of problems, literary and philosophical, that would doom anyone trying to render them faithfully to the big screen.

   I know, I know. Some of you out there may loosely subscribe to her political views – essentially, every man for himself -- as I did somewhat when I first read the books as a callow teen Republican. With all due respect, a little growing up convinced me that they’re preposterous, even when you set moral considerations aside, sustainable only in the fantasy world she constructs in her novels.

   Essentially, she posits that everyone except the hero, the heroine and a tiny handful of others is an evil nincompoop whose views are so outlandish that anything the hero says or does seems brilliant in comparison. It’s easy to win arguments when you create an opponent who is an idiot, but it’s intellectually dishonest. She's flailing at wispy straw men instead of real people and real ideas.

April 18, 2011

How to Succeed in Business

Total People in Discussion: 5

    My wife and I attended Liberty High School's production of "How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying" Saturday night.

    The kids did a terrific job, not just as performers but also in constructing the wonderful sets for the show. I'm always blown away by the professionalism and talent level of this area's high school musicals.

    We've never seen this particular show, which is getting extra attention right now during its Broadway revival, featuring Harry Potter star Daniel Radcliffe. Here's an article about the show's history.

    I was invited to attend by director and Spring Garden Elementary School Principal Eric Smith, with whom I've corresponded over the years. He, wife Stephanie Smith and Gayle Justice, the leadership team behind some great Liberty Theatre productions of the past, were called out of retirement when this year's director left unexpectedly in December. They were told that if they didn't step forward, there would be no show.

   "No pressure, right!" he wrote me.

   I suspect that accounted for the extra level of warmth with which the cast greeted the Smiths and Justice at the end of Saturday's performance. They truly saved the day.

April 15, 2011

Movie Quote Quiz

Total People in Discussion: 31

     We raced through last week's Movie Quote Quiz so quickly last week that I decided to throw another one up today. I think it's pretty tough, but I thought that last week and you guys polished it off in just a few hours.

     The four themes here are the four actors/actresses who appear in these movies, in some cases together. See if you can identify them as well as the quotes.

     The usual rules apply. Don't hog the quiz by answering a bunch of these. Pick a couple, preferably the tougher ones, and then let other people participate. It's more democratic.

    And of course don't look the quotes up on the Internet if you intend to participate. It's cheating.

   Let's go:

April 14, 2011

American Idol

Total People in Discussion: 6

   Since "American Idol" has decided to dispense with judging in favor of middle-school cheerleaders, I find myself watching these performances and imagining what Simon would say if he hadn't jumped ship.

   James? Good move. Choose a song and performance that focuses on great guitar-playing and minimal singing, even though you're not the one playing the guitar and this is supposed to be a singing competition. His arrogant self-indulgence may get him sent home, which would be too bad, because at least he's interesting.

   Casey? Excellent choice. Ignore the music industry expert and stage Creepy Guy Bad Jazz Night at the Beatnik Coffee Bar instead. The judges wasted their save on this person?

   Haley? Never mind this crap about a bad song choice. She sang a good song very badly.

   Paul? "Old Time Rock 'N Roll?" OMG, that was awful Why is this person and his bad jackets still around?

   Jacob? He's so full of himself that I imagine him lifting off the ground and floating away to the Island of Misfit Egomaniacs. His solution to landing in the bottom three last week: Sing one of the operatic old lady songs from a Rodgers and Hammerstein musical.  Yeah, that should win everybody over.

   Scotty? So cautious at this point that "Everybody's Talking," which would have been perfect for him, seems like too big a stretch from his very narrow comfort zone. So he sings George Strait instead.

   Lauren? With all those great movie-related songs to choose from, you pick ... a Miley Cyrus vehicle? Really?

   Stefano? My crystal ball tells me he'll be lucky to open for somebody at Mayfair someday. More likely, he'll be singing "Proud Mary" at your wedding. Nice-looking kid, though.

April 13, 2011

Corbett Bumper Stickers

Total People in Discussion: 37

    In my column the other day, I mentioned a fictitious (I think) bumper sticker: “Don’t blame me, I voted for Onorato.”

   A couple of readers asked me where they could get one. Another, Dave Lutz of Salisbury, even offered his own: “Gov. Corbett: We Got What THEY Paid For!”

   This gave me an idea. How about a contest to come up with the best Corbett bumper sticker? I won’t restrict it to messages reflecting dissatisfaction with the new governor and his budget priorities. If you want to invent a bumper sticker supporting the governor, preferably in a humorous way, have at it. I presume you’ll do that by ripping ex-Gov. Rendell, which is fine with me, too.

April 12, 2011

Best Five Tastykakes

Total People in Discussion: 27

    I’m never quite sure about these things, but my first impression is that we should be happy with the news that Philadelphia’s Tasty Baking Co. will be purchased by Flowers Foods of Georgia.

    Flowers says it will assume Tasty’s indebtedness, including its loan from the state government, and that it plans to continue making Tastykakes in Philadelphia.

    I wouldn’t be shocked if the operation eventually is moved South to less union-friendly grounds. But for now, at least, it just means more people in more parts of the country will be able to eat Tastykakes and that they'll be made where they've always been made, which are good things.

   I’ve flirted with Hostess and Drakes, primarily because one of my Christmas Light judges worked in the snack food industry and contributed Devil Dogs and other treats for our trips, but my heart always will belong to Tastykakes.

    I still remember stopping every afternoon at a little deli in New Providence, N.J., on my way home from football practice to buy a Tastykake pie – I’m partial to peach, but they all were good – and a Yoo-hoo chocolate drink. When my wife prepares a care package for one of her Lehighton-native brothers on the West Coast, it usually includes some Tastykake products. We all grew up with this stuff.

    Anyway, since they’re in the news, I thought I would throw out this question for you all: What are your top five favorite Tastykake treats?    

    I’ll prime the pump with my list:

April 11, 2011

Make Elmer Fudd Work for It

Total People in Discussion: 4

    The state Senate Judiciary Committee is scheduled to vote Tuesday on the latest attempt to ban pigeon shoots in Pennsylvania.

   Senate Bill 626, which you can read here, bears the name of several Morning Call area senators of both parties, I’m happy to report. It’s very specific about banning the practices of hunting by launching animals or tying them up.

     It defines the banned "trap shoot" or "block shoot" as an event during which participants shoot or attempt to shoot targets that are:

   "(1) launched or otherwise immediately presented to the shooter with electronic or mechanical assistance from a fixed location or locations within a predefined shooting field; or (2) affixed to a rope, chain or other tethering device when presented to the shooter."

    Contrary to the claims that I’m sure will be repeated at the hearing, as they have been every time this has come up, this is not the first step on a slippery slope toward banning hunting. It’s about ending barbaric practices that most other states long since have outlawed and that should be an embarrassment to any real sportsman.

   I watched one of these pigeons shoots almost exactly two years at the inaptly named Pike Township Sportsmen’s Association in Oley, Berks County, and it was pathetic. Here’s an excerpt from a column I wrote about anti-pigeon shoot bills that were circulating at that time.

April 8, 2011

Movie Quote Quiz

Total People in Discussion: 25

    Today’s Movie Quote Quiz is pretty darned tough, if you ask me, but I think you’re up to the task.

    You’ll find four themes here, all involving actors who appear in the movies on this list. Identify the actors, and it’ll be much easier to recognize the movies. I can tell you that one of these guys is something less than a household name, but he’s been in some memorable films.

   Let’s talk rules. Confine yourself to answering only a couple of these the first time around so everyone gets a chance to play. You’ll be welcomed back with open arms by Saturday if there are unidentified quotes still sitting there.

   It should go without saying, but I’ll say it anyway, that you shouldn’t look these up on the Internet if you intend to answer. It would make this whole thing even more pointless than it already is.

  Got it? Let’s go:

April 7, 2011

Here is How the Government Shutdown Will Be Averted

Total People in Discussion: 5

    I know a government shutdown is looking increasingly likely, but I'm feeling curiously hopeful.  

   For all the focus on conflicting budget numbers, I'm convinced that this is how the budget impasse will be broken and a shutdown avoided:

   House Speaker John Boehner stepped into the Capitol Tanning Complex and greeted the towel boy.

   "Good morning, Roscoe," he said. "Are we all set for my 11:00 session?"

   "Yes, sir, Mr. Speaker," Roscoe said. "I have you down for your usual, tanning bed No. 3."

   "My favorite! Excellent. I'll just hit the Republican locker room for a moment and I'll be ready to go. While I have you, put me down for Saturday and Sunday, same time. I hate to miss a day, and my schedule opened up for the weekend."

    "That may be a problem, Mr. Speaker," Roscoe said.

    "What do you mean?"

   "Sir, with the government shutting down Friday, the Tanning Complex will be padlocked and its employees furloughed. We just got word from the White House yesterday."

   Boehner was sputtering. "Are you %$#^ serious? Shut down the Tanning Complex?'

   "It's straight from the president, sir."

   "That diabolical monster! How can he do this to ... well, you and the other employees here? It's fiendish."

   "With all due respect, sir, the shutdown would slow the approval of projects by the EPA, damage home sales, impact clinical trials at the National Institutes of Health, slow down the processing of tax returns, prevent the approval of small-business loans, delay new applications for Social Security benefits, stop the issuance of passports, close down national parks and force furloughs of hundreds of thousands of federal employees. The impact will be a lot more far-reaching than just a tanning chamber for legislators."

   "I'm aware of all that, but when you directly attack the ability of elected officials to look healthy and youthful, you're striking way below the belt!"

    "You could always use a public tanning salon until this is over."

    "Unthinkable. I'm not going to set my naked body down in a tanning bed that might have been used by God knows who. It's bad enough that Barney Frank comes in here once in a while."

    "Well, then you'll just have to be pasty or increase your self-tanner applications until this is over."

    "Out of the question. I already look like a jack-o-lantern. Put me down for those weekend appointments. I'm off to the White House to settle this thing. Tea party be damned."

    "You'll be condemned as a traitor."

   "At least I'll be a tanned traitor."

 

April 7, 2011

American Idol

Total People in Discussion: 6

     This was a good week for the "American Idol" contestants, who were singing the songs of members of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and were coached by will.i.am. Gwen Stefani also supposedly was doing something related to the girls' clothes, but I never quite figured it out.

     This show nearly batted 1.000 in terms of demonstrating the new dynamic between judges and contestants. Until Randy offered a mildly critical comment about the beginning of next-to-last singer Stefano's "When a Man Loves a Woman" performance -- Randy was immediately shouted down by J-Lo, who was horrified at his breach of protocall -- the judges had gone the entire show without a single negative observation. Randy's overall verdict was somewhat positive anyway, so you could reasonably argue that it was a perfect night in which every contestant was, in the words of Steve, "beautiful." Steven, by the way, has not disliked a single performance all season.

    I'm not sure how this helps the viewers sort things out or the performers improve, but hey, that's the new Idol vibe, and who am I to question it? If you go to the end, you'll see a compilation of the accomplishments of the guy I think would make things much more interesting as an additional judge.

   There were a couple of noteworthy developments, I thought. Pia established that she can sing an uptempo song -- "River Deep, Mountain High," very nice -- and Scotty, endlessly cheesy and charming, did a very entertaining Elvis. Haley decided that since everyone keeps telling her she's like Janis Joplin (which she isn't), she might as well sing "Piece of My Heart," and she did it pretty well in a Janis-Lite kind of way.

    Now that Thia and Naima are out of the way, the cuts become more difficult, but I'm convinced Stefano, a little too lounge-lizardesque for my tastes, will be hitting the road tonight. I wouldn't be surprised if Casey ends up back in the bottom three, too. I would add Paul, although he was better than usual in a semi-rockabilly rendition of Johnny Cash's "Folsom Prison Blues."

   Here are my new power rankings, followed by my pitch for the new judge:

Pia, Scotty, James, Jacob, Lauren, Haley, Casey, Paul, Stefano

       

 

 

 

April 6, 2011

'What Is It?' Reveal

Total People in Discussion: 1

     Thanks partly to its appearance in last Sunday's Best of the Blogs feature in The Morning Call, which captures a lot of readers who don't do blogs, I got a great response to last week's "What Is It?" item. I've reposted the photo there on the left.

     As I mentioned when I put it up, it was refreshing to pose a question that I actually knew the answer to, which was a change from the truly mysterious "What Is It?" items I've been using recently. I always feel bad when I have no solid information to reveal.

     I do today, though. Here's what it is, including a photo of the item being used: