Is it ever OK to break the rules?
Late in March, my two grandsons lost their other grandfather, who died suddenly and unexpectedly.
Before my son-in-law told his sons about his father's death, he called to ask if I would attend an autograph signing not far from my home in Boston that my oldest grandson was to attend the night of the wake in Chicago.
I, of course, agreed to go.
The rules of the event said you had to pay a separate fee for each item signed. Evan had an official NHL puck he wanted autographed by Boston Bruins centre Patrice Bergeron.
The morning of the event, Evan called from Chicago. He asked me if he thought it would be OK to call me on my cellphone from the funeral home when I was scheduled to get the autograph.
"Maybe Patrice Bergeron will say hello to me," Evan said.
I said I would try.
After Evan's call, I figured I should find out who Bergeron was. In addition to playing for the Bruins, he had won a gold medal on the Canadian Olympic team. And buried in a sports reporter's blog was a reference to the fact that he had missed a game early in March because of his grandmother's death.
I called my son-in-law to tell him of the coincidence in Bergeron and Evan each losing a grandparent recently.
Figuring the phone call between Evan and Bergeron wouldn't happen, I printed up a sign that said, "Hello, Evan" as well as Bergeron's name and jersey number. (It's 37.) I figured we could get a photo snapped.
I also wrote to the owner of the shop where Bergeron was appearing, explaining my grandson's loss and seeing if there was any possibility Bergeron could get on the phone with Evan.
Terry Fox, co-owner of P&T; Sports Cards, called me back, told me how moved she was, but that it was unlikely there would be time for a call. Still, she said she'd print out the e-mail and give it to Bergeron's agent.
When we were third in line to get the autograph, Evan called. Someone grabbed the puck, ushered us up the line and, as Bergeron was signing it, I started to ask if he might talk to Evan. Having seen the printout of the e-mail, he asked for the phone.
"I'm sorry for your loss," Bergeron said. "Hang in there." His agent put the sign I had made in front of Bergeron and asked him to "sign it for the kid." He did it, breaking the rule about having to pay separately for each item signed.
Did Bergeron do the right thing by breaking the rules to sign an extra autograph? I like to think he did. I also know that he has new fans for life.
Jeffrey L. Seglin, is an associate professor at Emerson College in Boston, where he teaches writing and ethics. Send your ethical questions to rightthing@comcast.net.