Comments
Welcome to the virtual Maya launch party
2010-02-04 10:38:44
Seventeen ... the number so far of texts and emails from journalists wanting to know why they haven't been invited to the launch party for Maya, my new novel published TODAY!!
Three ... the number of others asking the same question.
The journalists are likely to think this is because I have so few friends.***(see note at bottom) More likely is that my real friends know I am not a launch party kind of person. And the 'why haven't I been invited' stats comfirm me in my view that book launches tend to be events for the media, rather than events that might help get you good media for the book.
It doesn't stop them being paranoid about missing something though. The Evening Standard have tried via my agent, my publisher, my charity, my party and my website to find out where this mystery event is being held.
So this morning I thought, let's put them out of their misery, let's have the launch party here, online, on the website, on Facebook, on Twitter, wherever people want to hold it. Welcome to the virtual launch.
Here I go, I'm a bit late, a bit edgy but I'm arriving at the launch party ... there's someone from the publishers to meet me, oh God I've forgotten her name ...
Hi, er ... mwah, mwah.
'Great turnout,' she says. 'Gail's on her way.'
Mmmm. 'Come on in ...'
'Have you met Cindy from the Times diary?'
'Lovely cover,' says Cindy. 'Is it based on anyone you know? (subtle sexual innuendo in the word know?)
'Er, no, not really.'
Man sidles up.
'Hi, I'm from the Telegraph diary ... great turnout ... can I ask you about the sex scene?'
'Alastair,' says publisher person, looking over shoulder of Telegraph man. 'Gail's arrived.' (Gail is uberpublisher, and young publisher person knows who boss is.)
'Excuse me,' I say to Telegraph prurient 'Gail's arrived.'
Mwah mwah. 'Thank God you're here,' I say (Gail is old friend and knows how much I hate looking-over-shoulder type social events. 'Just smile and be nice,' she says. 'Treat it like the dentist. It'll soon be over and it won't hurt when you're home.'
'Hey Gail,' says man, loudly. Gail introduces him to me as visiting exec from US. Makes introduction. No mwah mwah. Manly handshake.
'Love the cover Alastair,' he says. 'Very different to The Blair Years.'
'Yes, it is. Different sort of book really.'
'Can I leave you two to it?' says Gail. 'Ian's arrived I think.'
'What? Where are you going?'
Diarywriteralert beeps in rear of my brain. I turn.
'Hiiiiiii,' says pretty twentysomething in skimpy black cocktail dress. 'Feel a bit overdressed, but going onto another doooo later.'
'Which diary do you work for?' I ask, pulling back slightly to avoid having to mwah mwah complete stranger.
'How did you gueeeeess?' she asks. 'Wow, that is amazing.'
'Kind of instinct. Trained observer you know ... comes with writing novels I guess.' Do my James Bond eyebrow raise.
'Go on then, which paper, bet you can't guess that?'
'Standard I'd say.'
'OMG that is unbelievable' ... giggle ... flirtatious eye contact ... 'so tell me about Maya? Who is she, that's what I reeeeally want to know?'
'Alastair,' says publisher person 'do you think we can do some pictures?'
'Yeah sure ... excuse me. Got to do some pictures. You know how it is.' Skimpy Standard girl does mock hurt. Eyebrow raise turns to wink. Castigate myself for flirting with someone less than half my age
'Thought you needed rescuing,' says publisher person.
'Thanks.'
Freebieloving-scroungeralert beeps in front of mind.
'Al, how ya doin' ... not seen you since we were on the Mirror doing shifts together. Lot changed since then.'
(Vaguely) 'Oh yeah. How are you?'
'Any chance I can get a few signed copies, for old times sake maybe?'
'Er, not sure what the deal is on getting copies.'
'Speak to Vicki over there,' says publisher person. 'Freebie loving scrounging e-bastard,' she adds, steering me to the photographer.
'Do you want to say a few words?' asks Gail.
'Do you know what, I think I'd rather tweet' ...
And so I do .... Maya out today. FB/twitterfriends go Waterstone's and make sure well displayed. Launch party at http://www.alastaircampbell.org/blog.php.
Then I do a few mwah mwahs, evade the Mail on the way out (at least the publisher had not let them in) and jump in a cab for home.
Enjoy the book, those who get it.
* Meanwhile, thanks for the messages from those impressed with the quick delivery of The Blair Years. Remember it is 15 quid, with £7.50 going to the Labour party. http://www.alastaircampbell.org/bookshop.php.
*** Need a bit of advice. I understand 5000 friends is the limit on Facebook. I am just short of that and have almost 1,000 outstanding friend requests. I think it looks a bit winky-wanky to set up a fan page, so what do I do?
Archive
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A tribute to a lovely manPublish date: 2009-06-18 17:19:40
Bad times in Belfast, great day for Burnley, odd statement from Ed BallsPublish date: 2009-06-18 10:04:47
A plea for five-figure cyber-donationsPublish date: 2009-06-17 07:40:42
On two inquiriesPublish date: 2009-06-16 08:57:39
From India to Iran to Labour witPublish date: 2009-06-15 10:13:17
Memories of Princess DianaPublish date: 2009-06-14 09:54:55
A House Divided?Publish date: 2009-06-13 02:53:47
A humbling NHS experience, a media row and a good GB speechPublish date: 2009-06-12 10:48:46
Psychiatrists heading for relegation in 'disease prestige' league tablePublish date: 2009-06-11 10:25:35
The shrinks awaitPublish date: 2009-06-10 09:44:16
As Obama fights for healthcare, let's celebrate the record herePublish date: 2009-06-09 12:52:55
Anger at BNP seats must be turned into activismPublish date: 2009-06-08 14:11:10
Can today be as frenzied as Friday?Publish date: 2009-06-07 10:31:04
Take heart from a win in LambethPublish date: 2009-06-06 18:46:40
JP is right there was no proper campaign but Tories still weakPublish date: 2009-06-05 13:47:20
Do we care more about the NHS or moats?Publish date: 2009-06-04 00:21:23
Guardian of social justice or attention-seeker?Publish date: 2009-06-03 10:19:33
Who says Britain can't deliver the best?Publish date: 2009-06-02 08:08:38
Mainstream has a duty to vote against BNPPublish date: 2009-06-01 11:03:29
Let Diversity inspire a vote against the hate-filled BNPPublish date: 2009-05-31 12:24:20
White House whack at UK media well-timed but sure to be ignoredPublish date: 2009-05-30 13:41:00
Elvis has a plan to make MPs King againPublish date: 2009-05-29 12:09:44
At least there's a campaign on in ItalyPublish date: 2009-05-28 09:04:32
A blow to gay rights and a boost for Cameron's short-termismPublish date: 2009-05-27 11:27:41
It's my blog and I'll be a big kid if I want toPublish date: 2009-05-26 23:25:58
Highs feel better after so many lowsPublish date: 2009-05-26 10:13:12
Only one present countsPublish date: 2009-05-25 11:05:46
Contrast Cheney and BushPublish date: 2009-05-24 12:11:45
Sex (or at least the female form) obsessed BritainPublish date: 2009-05-23 20:49:57
Sport at both ends of the financial spectrumPublish date: 2009-05-23 09:57:23
Stronger together - whether Scotland or expensesPublish date: 2009-05-22 10:22:36
Back to Number 10, familiar faces, familiar argumentsPublish date: 2009-05-21 10:14:34
Speaking up for ParliamentPublish date: 2009-05-20 11:44:17
Peace in the Middle East - yes he canPublish date: 2009-05-19 09:37:35
Breaking news - one frenzy at a timePublish date: 2009-05-18 10:34:30
Getting a good look at Vince CablePublish date: 2009-05-17 09:36:55
How do you solve a problem like Silvio?Publish date: 2009-05-16 09:32:21
It was the internet wot won itPublish date: 2009-05-15 10:04:57
There now follows ... a good whack at CameronPublish date: 2009-05-14 17:21:28
They got their kit off - so you get your cash outPublish date: 2009-05-14 07:41:11
Expenses row must not obscure Tory intentions on minimum wagePublish date: 2009-05-13 16:12:08
We love you Burnley, we do ... what a nightPublish date: 2009-05-13 02:37:17
A tweet cannot express the wonders of TGVPublish date: 2009-05-12 08:48:31
It's Mind week - Get it off your Chest with me and Stephen FryPublish date: 2009-05-11 06:29:15
Hate the Mail, love ObamaPublish date: 2009-05-10 10:04:00
Burnley 1 Reading 0 - a biased reportPublish date: 2009-05-09 21:26:32
MPs expenses - time for party leaders to meet againPublish date: 2009-05-09 09:50:19
Should happiness replace prosperity as national goal?Publish date: 2009-05-08 08:43:23
Musings from a sleepless nightPublish date: 2009-05-07 07:33:49
Darren Fletcher - an injustice that has to be rightedPublish date: 2009-05-06 09:52:29
Maggie's legacy not as great as she thinksPublish date: 2009-05-05 08:33:02
Here's hoping Cardiff is metaphor for CameronPublish date: 2009-05-04 09:38:30
More Mr Benn and Co pleasePublish date: 2009-05-03 10:03:00
Going Fourth with JPPublish date: 2009-05-02 18:25:41
Journalism - print first, think laterPublish date: 2009-05-02 09:10:01
In praise of two poetsPublish date: 2009-05-01 10:26:36
JP hits the road againPublish date: 2009-04-29 18:52:11
My night with Eddie IzzardPublish date: 2009-04-29 10:53:25
Explaining the 50p top tax ratePublish date: 2009-04-28 09:22:53
George Best and Martin McGuinnessPublish date: 2009-04-27 09:02:35
Cameron confused over indepdendence and impartialityPublish date: 2009-04-26 12:20:56
Guide ro Marathon running part 2Publish date: 2009-04-25 11:01:34
Good signals on coal and the OlympicsPublish date: 2009-04-24 10:45:28
Tips for the London MarathonPublish date: 2009-04-23 17:29:27
Missed the Budget, saw why it matteredPublish date: 2009-04-22 23:09:31
Football good, politics bad. AllegedlyPublish date: 2009-04-22 00:00:24
The Great Wall gets greaterPublish date: 2009-04-21 09:55:22
Two sides to police storyPublish date: 2009-04-20 11:39:54
Budgets, Balls, billionaires and Susan BoylePublish date: 2009-04-19 12:31:45
Do muscles have memories?Publish date: 2009-04-18 09:44:44
Bring back standing at footballPublish date: 2009-04-17 14:50:22
When Facebook friends fall outPublish date: 2009-04-16 12:29:16
Guardian sightings and the email and bath plug agendaPublish date: 2009-04-15 11:32:16
The spin is all in the prismPublish date: 2009-04-14 09:22:41
A setback, not a crisisPublish date: 2009-04-13 12:55:19
The real lessons from Damian McBridePublish date: 2009-04-12 10:49:47
Will English always be the dominant language?Publish date: 2009-04-11 10:02:02
On the pipes and what makes a ScotPublish date: 2009-04-10 11:06:20
John Prescott lazy? NO WAYPublish date: 2009-04-09 09:11:31
David Frost is seventyPublish date: 2009-04-08 08:48:38
The Speaker, BBC2, tonight and tomorrow 8pmPublish date: 2009-04-07 14:25:31
Obama, colds and being woken by Korean missilesPublish date: 2009-04-06 11:59:24
When a call matters more than protocolPublish date: 2009-04-05 11:33:42
Green Cities Champions LeaguePublish date: 2009-04-04 10:19:53
Could Cameron have delivered the G20 deal?Publish date: 2009-04-03 10:11:59
Of Benn and BonoPublish date: 2009-04-02 08:21:16
Memo to Sarko - allez vite a LondresPublish date: 2009-04-01 08:46:17
Happy April Fool's DayPublish date: 2009-04-01 01:44:05
Eurostar, Le Monde and a thought for the G20 sherpasPublish date: 2009-03-31 09:17:22
Why Kevin Rudd made an impactPublish date: 2009-03-30 10:24:41
Pre-G20 hype matters less than post-G20 processPublish date: 2009-03-29 13:17:28
The Damned UnitedPublish date: 2009-03-28 10:37:04
A hobby horse, a plug and a bit of sportPublish date: 2009-03-27 10:22:23
Cloughie - he had a lot to be big-headed aboutPublish date: 2009-03-26 09:38:36
A sad sight of the old fearing the youngPublish date: 2009-03-25 17:03:07
Post-modern, post-structural, or bullshit?Publish date: 2009-03-25 08:18:02
Learning the right lessons from ObamaPublish date: 2009-03-24 08:53:15
Lazy Dave needs to keep an eye on lazy KenPublish date: 2009-03-23 11:16:14
Farewell favourite restaurant, hello hometownPublish date: 2009-03-22 08:18:09
Dave, Danny and have the Tories really changed?Publish date: 2009-03-21 08:55:13
Life beyond Dover ...Publish date: 2009-03-20 10:11:21
My friends in The New Statesman - Fergie, Fiona, Tony, Sarah, Kevin, 'Dacre,' and a great GB idea for the G20Publish date: 2009-03-18 10:38:22
Iraq, Iran, GB, Obama and diplomatic chessPublish date: 2009-03-17 10:07:13
The Age of StupidPublish date: 2009-03-16 08:27:13
Is all change good?Publish date: 2009-03-15 10:00:06
The pressure of being a post-modern sex godPublish date: 2009-03-14 10:00:55
Cameron still hasn't sealed the deal with businessPublish date: 2009-03-13 09:21:49
Stand up for social workersPublish date: 2009-03-12 08:31:17
Surely Malcolm Tucker could have told Armando Ianucci ... You can't spin a spinnerPublish date: 2009-03-11 10:58:25
Start of a new approach from Labour?Publish date: 2009-03-10 09:54:12
A peace process still strongPublish date: 2009-03-09 08:21:05
Day of destiny for the real footballer of the yearPublish date: 2009-03-08 09:21:06
Private advice to Peggy Mitchell - the leaked note in fullPublish date: 2009-03-07 08:17:21
Boris, the Tories and the tummy-tickling poodle pressPublish date: 2009-03-06 09:49:37
A day in the life of the self-obsessed TV reporterPublish date: 2009-03-05 07:55:47
GB - good speech, well deliveredPublish date: 2009-03-04 19:31:05
Notes on the environment, a role in EastEndersPublish date: 2009-03-04 10:58:56
She may be my 'wife' but it is time to rebut!Publish date: 2009-03-03 10:52:59
Some speeches matter more than othersPublish date: 2009-03-02 12:04:45
Mental health and the Carling Cup FinalPublish date: 2009-03-01 09:08:17
Inside the chocolate factoryPublish date: 2009-02-28 10:23:59
GB on the G20, JP on Jeremy KylePublish date: 2009-02-27 09:14:36
Charity and the credit crunch, please give generously!Publish date: 2009-02-26 08:55:12
Why oh why are the Tories not home and dry?Publish date: 2009-02-24 09:44:59
Me, Dermot and ten top songsPublish date: 2009-02-23 10:02:19
Names round-upPublish date: 2009-02-22 08:43:39
What's in a name?Publish date: 2009-02-21 09:58:14
Editing the New StatesmanPublish date: 2009-02-20 11:42:36
Salute Peter M’s proper use of the F wordPublish date: 2009-02-19 09:58:58
Labour's communications challenge for the NHSPublish date: 2009-02-18 10:34:39
In praise of KeighleyPublish date: 2009-02-17 14:33:57
A night at the EmiratesPublish date: 2009-02-17 00:06:51
When marriage is testedPublish date: 2009-02-16 13:36:35
Spare me the myths and the whiningPublish date: 2009-02-15 13:29:50
Dave Cameron - is that all there is?Publish date: 2009-02-14 11:11:55
Boris Johnson: F is for ...Publish date: 2009-02-13 07:55:10
The Cameron vacuumPublish date: 2009-02-12 14:48:33
Lincoln, Obama, Blair and the 24 hour media culturePublish date: 2009-02-11 10:28:47
Eighteen interviews later ...Publish date: 2009-02-10 19:24:45
Time to talk about Time to Change on NewsnightPublish date: 2009-02-09 22:47:49
So that’s what they mean by online community?Publish date: 2009-02-08 12:12:51
First blogPublish date: 2009-02-05 15:23:57
Trevor Malcolm Portsmouth Hampshire
2010-02-05 01:49:16YES, ANOTHER ONLINE PARTY DATE: THIS ONE, TO CELEBRATE
THE FIRST ANNIVERSARY OF ALASTAIR CAMPBELL’S WEBLOG
OR …
JUST ONE POOF AT THE CANDLE ON TOP YA BIRTHDAY FRUITCAKE
THURSDAY: Announcing … on the eve of this first anniversary of your weblog, Mr Campbell, congratulations, the heartiest imaginable
Now, that’ll be when the REAL party starts, after the virtual “book launch” for your new novel, Maya, on Thursday (see your blog details, published opposite)
See, at precisely 3:23pm Friday, it will be one year to the moment since you entered the blogosphere here
So, it’ll be befitting that at 3:23pm, beginneth the synchronised throwing our top hats in the air, whilst we croon “ … jolly good fella, for AC’s a jolly good f … an’ so say all of us,” right?
Then – POOF – you blow out that single celebratory candle and we all clap loudly, across the nation
The candle a-top the secret-recipe-Nigella’s Special Birthday Boy fruitcake and you make an earnest wish. All this palaver to mark the Alastair Campbell weblog birthday numero uno, eh? Good job it’s only once a year, then
Still, jolly well done, you. And equally Team @ SilverFish, too
As for the candle blow, with your robust lungs, sir, I’m sure one big poof’ll be enough
TM --------
--------------
Robert Jackson
2010-02-05 00:56:36Yes ...great party and as well as the buzz about Maya there was the buzz about Grayling being ticked off for comparing apples and elephants.
Still - quoting Goebbels(sp?) - if the lie is big enough then no one will dare challenge it.
The problem with this Tory lie is that it HAS been challenged and found wanting. Yet they intend to carry on propagating it as if it has some meaning.
Arrogant? Stupid? Strategic?
There will come a point at which, much like 2008 US Republican Presidential candidate John McCain correcting a lady who asserted Barack Obama was an Arab, Cameron will have to backpedal.
Great party - yours - not Grayling's.
Good luck with the book!
Lou Rossati
2010-02-04 23:08:00Bugger! Have I missed all the champagne? And where's the ruddy loo? I'm busting. Anyone seen the man of the hour? Oh, there he is. No, I'm NOT going over to introduce myself. That would be so...winky-wanky. Besides, being terribly British I'll just wait until someone introduces me to him. Which they probably won't. Ho hum. Must order the book, and move my signed copy of Blair Years to bedside table with intention of finally reading it.
Then go home and start a Facebook page, "I bet I can find a million people who want Alistair Campbell's Facebook friends limit to be raised".
Alan Quinn
2010-02-04 19:22:44Sorry I'm late AC, the book launch looks to be going well. The Blair Years arrived today, superb service, faster than the strike of a Diamondback Rattlesnake. Many Thanks.
C Burke
2010-02-04 18:24:02'Oh God, Alastair! Put some trunks on at least!. Is Tony coming?'
'That's ok. Where's the key bowl?'
Andrew
2010-02-04 17:56:38Excellent party Alastair, I would have brought nibbles if it wasn't such a viral campaign. I very much look forward to reading Maya soon.
sara elnusairi
2010-02-04 17:43:06Hi Alastair. Congratulations on the new book. Set up a fan page. It's not that 'winky-wanky' - it's not like setting up a fan club or anything. It's not like you really have over 5,000 friends, anyway ;0) xx
C Burke
2010-02-04 16:51:12'Alastair, this launch party is great! Can you be a doll and get out and turn the hot tub water temp up?'
Sure, but don't look'.
Paula Harrison
2010-02-04 15:39:17Mwah mwah, lovely do, saw the Metro did nice piece on it - didn't see her at the party - rushed to Waterstone's, they said they don't have book till Saturday! Why are books never in shop when they come out???? Mwah
Ray Merrall
2010-02-04 13:41:09Hiya Alastair [hand extended for kiss on ring]
Hateful cartoon p26 Private Eye today.
Maybe you should have invited them into the "party" along with their new pals from Dacre's organ.
Gerry
2010-02-04 13:11:46hic!
Em
2010-02-04 13:07:17FYI, I worked as a bookseller and then a buyer in my salad days and savvy authors would make a beeline for us at launches. It's true we might have been the only people there who were genuinely happy to be there. We appreciated the free food, free booze, and possessed an actual love for books. We also were the people who could make a real difference with sales. These days a lowly buyer may not decide on the number of initial copies purchased but may have a powerful effect on returns and re-orders over time. And one should not underestimate the power of a book recommendation from a bookseller to a customer. Those recommendations shouldn't have been influenced by the quality of launches but they were.
Ben Elton and David Lodge (and others) would come into our bookshop and argue with us about returns of their new releases (after three months) and ask us to justify the number of copies (always too low in their opinion) we'd keep in stock at any given time. i've actually sat with a couple of authors and showed them our sales history to explain. I don't recommend you follow in their footsteps, but it illustrates how well they understood our power.
Gerry
2010-02-04 13:00:13Looks like I overdressed! What are Ross and Ramsay are giggling about?
Ela Wiązowska
2010-02-04 12:56:10It's great to be at the virtual launch party. Can't wait to get my copy here in Warsaw(I hope the mail service won't fail me). Good luck with sales.
olli issakainen
2010-02-04 12:46:37Have you ever heard of Dunbar´s number? It is limit to number of people with whom one can maintain stable social relationships. Commonly cited approximation is 150, not 5,000!
Ps. I was surprised to read from your Fanhouse UK BFC column that there is not a character called Mr J. Coyle, a sideways career move consultant, in Maya. George Clooney could have played him in the inevitable Oscar winning movie adaptation of Maya starring Keira Knightley.
David Banks
2010-02-04 12:28:16In an equivocal review in the Times you were compared to Iain Banks, and his novel 'Dead Air' which is high praise indeed.
The reviewer took issue with the fact that the reader could not sympathise with the narrator. So that's Martin Amis's oeuvre dead in the water then.
Good luck with the book, not that you'll need it.
Em
2010-02-04 12:26:20Champagne!
gareth
2010-02-04 12:21:01where's the toilet?
Pearl Freeman
2010-02-04 12:13:41Good luck. Big piece in Metro today I see
Mark Hammer
2010-02-04 12:13:00great canapies, but soooo noisy
Jane A
2010-02-04 11:12:55I love the idea of the virtual party & am very pleased to be here. No more what-to-wear stresses either, and the first time I have been to a party at 10am. Very entertained about the James Bond eyebrow raise.
On your last question it is uber-winky-wanky to have a fan page. Add people in as people drift out. It's like a different sort of party - the room will only hold so many.
Good luck with sales; it's a great book.
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