Entries for July 2007

Because everything we see on TV is real, the national organizations for sororities and fraternities are up in arms over ABC Family's new show "Greek," Ohio State's Lantern writes. The show–which is not about big, fat weddings but rather debaucherous coeds with an affinity for stripping on front lawns and drinking too much tequila–has drawn criticism from sisterhoods like Delta Delta Delta, which condemns the program for promoting "the stereotypical and mistaken misconceptions about greek [sic] life." Fine, but let's back up here. This is on ABC Family? What? –Alison Go

UC-Santa Barbara's chancellor alleviated two of the administration's most irritating problems in one fell swoop by banning camping on school property, reports the Daily Nexus.

Citing health and safety concerns, the ban forbids anyone to overnight on campus grounds in a sleeping bag, tent, or other such structure. The university says the reason for the ban is concern over a growing number of "transients" (read: the homeless), but student activists, who have set up tent cities in the past, could also be affected by the new rule.

However, the more militant activists aren't protesting the antiprotesting measure, because it's not really civil disobedience if it isn't illegal in the first place. "I think it's great," says one student. "The fact that they were letting us do it didn't give us the opposition we wanted." –Jackie Mantey

In the newest chapter of Iowa State's "Chaplain? Or not a chaplain?" saga, not much progress seems to have been made. While the athletic department had earlier conceded and appointed a "life skills assistant" instead of a "chaplain" for the football team after 130 professors threw a massive hissy fit, the Iowa State Daily reports the same person who would have been named the team's religious counselor now fills the PC-ified position. The appointee is a Texas Baptist pastor and friend of the coach.

And no surprise here: Professors are still pissed off. –Alison Go

A pack of feral cats got the boot at Texas Tech this week after they sneaked into basement classrooms of a campus building and subsequently infested the area with fleas, reports the Daily Toreador. These ain't no lolcats, though. Instead of acting completely adorable, the feral felines used sand intended for engineering projects as their litter. The humans who ratted them out said their presence wasn't the problem: It was the parasites (fleas) they dragged in since their arrival over the winter. The cats have been conveniently relocated to another part of campus, and school officials have crossed their fingers hoping they don't return with their itchy, ankle-biting friends. –Christina Mueller

Tibetan monks invaded Sophomore Family Weekend at Dartmouth University this week. According to the Dartmouth, the main event was monks meticulously painting with sand, messing it up, and then throwing it into the Connecticut River–all to "symbolize the evanescence of life." One student described the visit as "thrilling," a word we never thought we'd see in the same sentence as Tibetan monk. –Alison Go

Remember that one time when you tried to figure out how many days in a row you could go out drinking? But then, after 31/₂ weeks, you got inexplicably sick and were forced to stop your Dionysian ways? Next time, you might want to try drinking just wine, and lots of it. Studies suggest that wine not only helps you fight heart disease and the ravages of time (if you're capable of drinking hundreds of glasses a day), but also—because of its antibacterial qualities—it may prevent strep throat, Penn State's Daily Collegian reports.

Sound too good to be true? The study was conducted by researchers at the University of Pavia in northern Italy, an area known for wine production. Don't throw out your Listerine quite yet. —Alison Go

Men take many more risks when it comes to sex and drugs than women, but women are catching up, Penn State's Daily Collegian writes, summarizing a survey conducted by the National Center for Health Statistics. Now that the "news" is out of the way, let's play the game "Spot the clichés, painful generalizations, and obvious statements."

1. "Women seem to be trying to catch up to men," says a Penn State professor.

2. But some seem to think that the numbers are even more equal than the surveys suggests. "[The professor] said because of socialization, men also tend to exaggerate their sexuality while females usually under-report their sexual past." (Cue American Pie).

3. "However, most people don't have an exact scorecard," she adds.

4. More reason why the numbers may be more equal than not: "If females have a lot of sex, they are labeled as a whore," says a student. "But if guys do it, they are called a pimp or player and get more respect." (Do people even say "pimp" anymore?)

5. And one student, who conducted a similar survey to the national one, but obviously much, much smaller, says she found less discrepancy between men and women's self-reported sexual activity. "It does take two to tango." True, and now we're all the wiser. —Alison Go

Fluffy and Rover acting up again? Perfectly legitimate government-funded research suggests checking your lunar calendar or the night sky. One Colorado State scientist set out to debunk the urban legend about a full moon making animals crazy but instead found that medical visits were 23 percent more likely for cats and 28 percent more likely for dogs during the monthly lunar alignment, the Rocky Mountain Collegian reports.

The popular theory is that the extra light emitted by the moon makes animals more active, creating more chance for injury. However, many of the reasons for the visits (toxins and heart attacks) seem to have no direct correlation with light levels.

Two studies testing humans for similar werewolf-like behavior have proved inconclusive, yet some scientists attribute our immunity to full moons to our over-developed brains. Obviously, those researchers have not read this, this, or this story. —Jackie Mantey and Alison Go

*The North Carolina State student government overspent their budget, the Technician reports. And looking at their damage control strategy ("The problem is during the last administration" and "There was only so much I could do"), these kids have a flourishing future in grown-up government.

*A sports columnist from the Lantern is worried that Ohio State's returning school president "could spell trouble for Buckeye athletics." Part of the problem? He is "well-known for his stance on increased academic standards by student-athletes." Trouble indeed.

*The Indiana Daily Student diligently reports that psych researchers have trouble finding test subjects in the student-sparse summer and that the shortage is neither unexpected or detrimental. So...what exactly is the news here? --Alison Go

Smokey Bear has lasted almost 63 years, yet Kent State University's crime prevention mascot, Simon the Squirrel, may be abandoned after just one year because of budget constraints, reports the Daily Kent Stater.

Taking a cue from Iowa State University's Frank the Flamingo, KSU's grotesquely dark-haired "squirrel" was created to inform students in a "nonthreatening manner" about the consequences of alcohol and drug violations. Almost $2,000 worth of budget funds was spent on posters, T-shirts, ad space, decals, and—of course—nuts to promote Simon's message. The didactic rodent's fate is now in the hands of police, who will determine whether the stuffed squirrel has been worth two grand in undergrad drinking prevention. —Jackie Mantey

Remember flash mobs—that trend circa 2003 in which hordes of people gather in public, do something absurd, then vanish as quickly as they appeared? The Daily Nebraskan recently infiltrated the Lincoln Underground Flash Mob and writes all about it.

The mob's "Hungry Crowd" gathering, in which members, clad in black with Zorro-type masks, gathered on the steps of the University of Nebraska student union and "attacked" one member dressed in white, quickly turned to romantic clichés: One member asked another to marry him.

Finding a flash mob in the middle of Nebraska? Weird. Proposing to your girlfriend in the middle of it? Even weirder. —Christina Mueller

*A Honda Accord crashed through a sub shop in Blacksburg, Virginia Tech's Collegiate Times reports. "I'm sorry, Officer. I just really wanted a sandwich."

*Real Daily Iowan headline: "UI Researchers Receive Constipation Grant." No word on how students will help with that research. —Alison Go

Your eHarmony account not working out like you planned? That could be because you're going to the wrong college. A recent study by a real-estate data company found that the city of State College, home to parts of Penn State University, has the highest percentage of singles of any city in the country, with 76.5 percent of its population unattached and rounding out a median age of 24, reports the Daily Collegian.

But single Penn Staters still have to do lots to change their relationship status—trolling about the local bars, apartment parties, and most efficiently, local speed-dating events, where participants are paired off for four-minute "minidates" before switching partners. The speed daters hope that after two and a half hours they will have found the loves of their lives. Tell that one to the grandchildren. —Jackie Mantey and Alison Go

The University of New Mexico wants to make its campus more bike-friendly with bike lockers and repair services, the Daily Lobo reports. Police also say they have caught a man they think is responsible for the majority of campus bicycle thefts. Between January 1 and April 7, there were 45 reported bicycle thefts, according to university police. Since April 8, the day the man was apprehended, there have been two. The Daily Lobo offers no comment from the suspect.—Alison Go

*Overachievers at Michigan State University have been in a tizzy ever since the school decided to raise the GPA thresholds for graduating with honors, the State News reports. "It's a little bit discouraging," said one student. "Especially if you're struggling in a class. You might panic."

*Turns out Duke University's wireless problems weren't caused by the iPhone, as previously reported (sorry, Apple!), but rather a hiccup in the school's Cisco network, writes Macworld. Paper Trail also apologizes to the Duke community as a whole for accusing it of wanton materialism.

*Apartment complexes near some college campuses have begun installing tanning beds on the premises, Kennesaw State University's Sentinel writes. Despite the potential health risks, the tanning beds are—no surprise here—exceptionally popular. —Alison Go